Reddit reviews 4,000 Questions for Getting to Know Anyone and Everyone

Also want to add to the LDR thing as ham_rain did. I spent four years in a long distance relationship (however not 8 timezones apart, just two). It was difficult because our schedules allowed us to only see each other two to four times per year (because a plane ticket was quite a bit of money and we wanted at least five days together for the price). I wouldn't change it if we were to do it over again (if you asked me back then, of course I would have, but the difficulty is one big thing that really made our relationship so strong). I was just beginning to figure out what I wanted, who I was, all that jazz. I was in my second year of college and would have likely failed many classes with a 'regular' relationship as I had very poor time management skills.

The distance was also great in that we were able to really get to know each other and everything was really slow to progress (we never really ran out of conversation topics because we're both pretty talkative, but I purchased this book at one point to use). The excitement to see him was like the first time, every time, for the first four years, and even beyond. We talked to each other every single day and always always called to say goodnight. He hated (and still hates) talking on the phone, but somehow he enjoyed the multiple hour chats we had. We really improved our conversational skills and learned how the other ticks.

After those 4 years I moved closer, about two hours away from where he lived. It may sound far away still, but was a huge change for us! I got to see him every 2-3 weeks on weekends, as opposed to a handful of times a year! It was great, and even for the first year of that I'd get similar butterflies to those as seeing him each time when it was so rare. Just seeing him always made (and still makes) the world a much brighter place. As someone who struggles with anxiety and depression, it was a pretty big deal to me to see him, and I still get very excited.

Then after two years of that, we moved to the same city, 15 minutes apart. That was probably the most trying thing, and probably mostly my fault. I'd never had to schedule my day with someone else in mind. I never had to consider partitioning time between friends and him for many years. I was used to setting aside a block of days, not segments of a day. Whenever I had something important I needed to work on or do, I liked to have most of the day for it, and I consider our times together really important since it used to be so rare. It was easier for him because he actually put more effort in to planning, whereas I just kind of stayed in the same rut I'd been in. I ended up hurting his feelings a few times because I would go long periods of time (around a week; nothing extensive) without planning to see him--though it wasn't at all because I didn't want to! I was just stuck in the mindset of occupying all my time with school, work, hobbies, and friends. Some of it was also depression, and a lot of it was a very controlling/needy roommate. It sounds ridiculous, but I would forget we lived in the same town (because we lived on opposite sides of a bigger city) and our schedules were so dramatically different. Slowly, I learned his daily rhythms and sorted out my own so that we could find overlap. It started as sitting at coffee shops to study/work, just so that we were together, and then we started planning actual dates, something we'd never really done! It was actually really fun and a little comical that we were 6-7 years into a relationship and just starting to go on dates.

A few years in and all the kinks have been worked out. I learned (still learning) proper time management and what he needs, he learned what I need, and now we either start or end the day together at the minimum. It's strange to say it was hard getting used to spending so much time together, but the slow paced progression of our relationship has created such a strong foundation for trust, honesty, communication, and understanding (not saying long distance is a main way of achieving that, just that it did). We'll have been together for 8 years April 8th!

Good luck with your relationship! I don't know what your situation is, but if it's something you both want to pursue, try to look for the positives. As with most things, you'll see what you look for.

[sorry for any overlap in my statements, tried to make everything flow chronologically]

I bought this book which can help when not knowing what to say or ask: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/0375720812
You can find one or two copies on popular filesharing sites.

I think some people see a conversation very objective based, and thus only answer a question posed, rather than to relate back something to continue the conversation. I think that's just what happens on the internet due to there being a lot of autism (maybe).

Here's another book of questions. It might be floating around out there somewhere on the internets in pdf form.