Reddit reviews Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000
We found 247 Reddit comments about Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000. Here are the top ones, ranked by their Reddit score.

[SPECIFICATIONS] Outer Dimension: 18.7 in. L × 14.37 in. W × 3.54 in. H. With 2 years US based manufacture warranty[MODERN SLIM DESIGN] The bidet seat is made out of anti-bacteria PP and fit most O shape toilets. Please make sure you measure your toilet bowl size and shape to ensure a perfect fit. The slim design and defined lines meet ergonomic, naturally fit the human body, looks more beautiful and use comfortably.[TWO WASH MODES] Rear Wash and Female Wash. The Female Wash is a gentle and dedicated water stream and will be produces cleans her front safely and comfortably. Especially for women during menstruation and pregnancy.[DUAL SELF-CLEANING NOZZLE] Two automatic extensible and retractable cleansing nozzles that fulfill both Rear Cleansing and Feminine Cleansing. Cleaning before and after using, avoid secondary pollution, guarantee safe use.[SAFE & FRIENDLY] Slow closing lid and seat helps prevent sudden loud noise and accidental injuries. No more accidentally loud noise and wake up the family at night. The mats on both sides of seat's bottom can prevent the ceramics from wear and tear.[EASY TO OPERATE] Abandon the tedious panel operation, start it with one switch. Just turn the function knob to the left or right to choose the appropriate function. Perfect for the elderly and children use. Requires no additional electricity, which makes it even more economical and eco-friendly.[EASY TO INSTALL] Come with the quick attach part for fast and easy installation. (7/8 in. plastic T-valve, 23.62 in. water inlet hose, 2pcs plastic nuts, 2pcs nylon plug nuts, 2pcs bolts, 2pcs washers, 1pcs fixing plate). The sturdy and durable bracket makes the bearing capacity is up to 330 LBS.
A bidet. Seriously, go try one. Changed my life. Bought an attachment soon after for my toilet and now have a squeaky clean bunghole 24/7.
*Here is the one I use, since people were asking for an example.
Amazon's current bestseller is similar to the one I got, and is going for $25 here.
They are super easy to install and you will never feel cleaner after taking a shit.
Get a bidet, dude.
It changed my life. No ass rashes!
If you can turn a wrench and tape some threads, a bidet will change your life. Never again will you make a thousand smearing wipes that still result in skidmarks. You just pat dry and walk away clean.
The only problem is that you'll never want to poop away from home again.
It's cheap and easy to install and the guy who converted me to the way of the bidet recommended it to me.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003TPGPUW/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o07_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Install a bidet. They are $24 on Amazon. Fuck fabric, only use it to dry your clean ass.
Edit: For your health
To my American brothers and sisters if you got shit on your arm would you wipe it off or clean it with water and wipe it?
I'm a American and I bought a bidet on Amazon after using it at a friends house. In American men want to seem masculine and they wanna seem not "gay". Most American men then see water going up your ass as gay or weird. They also don't understand how it could be cleaner.
I'm a guy who owns a bidet.
Astor Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet
Buy this for 24 bucks and you'll never go back plus it takes us a year to use a big package of toilet paper now.
Here is the one I got, its powered by water pressure and because of that there is no electricity and they last a really long time. Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_other_apa_rwh8ybK95BNM3
You can get a simple bidet on amazon that works on water pressure alone for about $30-40 here
https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_5?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1495437712&sr=1-5&keywords=Bidet
This is what I've got. Comes with a T connector to put in line with the toilet water line.
They sell the add-on to turn your toilet into one of those at Amazon.com.
EDIT:
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1319984450&sr=8-1
Before we moved in, I hired a forensic cleaning company to completely clean sanitize the whole house. (Well, except for the basement.) Being able to move into a perfectly clean house where I didn't have to worry about my then-infant daughter touching something nasty was a huge help.
Installing bidets on the toilets in the house was a big hygiene improvement, especially for my daughter.
Epoxy coating the garage floor has saved tons of time in spill cleanups.
here's one for $27
https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B003TPGPUW/ref=mp_s_a_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1496773298&sr=8-4&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=bidet&dpPl=1&dpID=31DZfu08OPL&ref=plSrch
It will absolutely help.
You can wiggle your butt around and get it pretty much everywhere. I don't usually hose down my cheeks, but the whole crevasse can get a thorough scouring.
source: GF diet, with lots of spicy greasy food = Usually a 5-7 on the birstol stool chart. https://www.continence.org.au/pages/bristol-stool-chart.html
Just buy this: https://smile.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1496433804&sr=8-5&keywords=toilet+seat+bidet
It'll pay for itself in toilet paper in six months or less, and you'll be able to get by with the shittiest, cheapest, thinnest toilet paper on earth and it won't matter because you're only using it to blot clean water off your tradesman's entrance.
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_KzbfAbV3E6H1T
GAME CHANGER
This one: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003TPGPUW/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o03_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
It attaches to your toilet and taps into the same water line. Took me about 10 minutes to install with no plumbing experience.
Bidets are God's gift to man. The non-electric ones are pretty cheap too.
Bidet is under $30. http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B003TPGPUW/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1419025895&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX200_QL40
Everyone on this subreddit, go on Amazon and get yourselves a bidet! Less than $30 to access that cooling booty relief, it’s also a major toilet paper money saver. This is the one I have, godspeed y’alls’ buttholes.
Nah man. THIS is a relief.
Everyone should have a bidet in their home. They're not all that expensive either unless you go with a high end Japanese model. I think I spent $25 on mine which has lasted 5 years so far, and is the best quick fix for summer swamp ass.
Edit: added amazon link to the bidet I have
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW
They all kind of work the same, but this is the one I have. It is placed under the back of the seat and attaches to the fresh water supply coming out of the wall. It's amazing.
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 is only $27. I am sorry this happened to you though, it sounds wretched. Also 'clitty litter' is hilarious!
I bought this one about two month ago and it’s a game changer. Took about 15 minutes to install and I’m not even a very handy guy.
Bought this bidet attachment 3 years ago and it’s the best $25 I’ve spent
not that expensive to retrofit.
Personally, I don't like using public drinking fountains because the nozzles are a bacterial dreamland. I imagine the spray heads on a bidet are even worse.
It's basically a jet of cold water that's aimed at your asshole. I've owned this exact one for just over a year now, and it's legitimately one of the top 10 purchases of my entire life. That's not even an exaggeration. It has a dial that lets you adjust the pressure of the water, so that you don't accidentally give yourself an enema. The nozzle is already angled so that the water hits the right target. Seriously, buy one. It'll change your life.
$30 and prime shipping
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1367967855&sr=8-2&keywords=bidet
Get a bidet. They're cheap and easy to install.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_qrLSyb5MDSEP8
Reusable toilet paper sounds gross.
I'm proud to say I haven't wiped my ass in months!
[Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000] (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_ws4oxb6P4YQQE)
Or you can go super cheap and get one that doesn't require electricity but shoots ambient temperature water.
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_h0IbBbT6ZMWN5
Edit: link that has 6.6k reviews instead of 60.
I get my toilet paper from Amazon as well, but I also got a $25 bidet from Amazon and it has been life changing. You will never ever ever regret it. My husband was a hard sell in trying it, now he won't poop anywhere but at home lol he feels disgusting without it. Took less than 10 minutes to install and only needed a Philips head screwdriver.
Basic $25 bidet
Slightly nicer one for $35
We have these non-electric bidets attached to our toilets.
Here is a link: http://smile.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1458580618&sr=1-1&keywords=bidet
They are much nicer to use specially for the heavily constipated pregnant women like me :-) The water is not heated, but I am used to it now.
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1427126441&sr=1-1&keywords=bidet
This is the one i have and it works flawlessly. no more skid marks in the boxers. No more ass rashes. no more dirt butt.
Seriously, buy clorox wipes and go on a spree getting all the knobs, handles, faucets, electonics, etc.
Then buy some baby wipes and introduce your roommate to the wonderful world of wiping. You could even buy a cheap and easy to install bidet attachment for him.
Even better
This $27 investment has saved me at least that in TP costs. 1 wipe every time, cleaner butthole, and only took 15 minutes to install. Why doesn't everyone have one?
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_awd_NVz2wb7797KH3
This is the one I bought.
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1459052071&sr=1-1&keywords=bidet
This one. No fancy heat or drying, but great pressure that you can adjust.
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1410983895&sr=1-1&keywords=bidet
You are all disgusting to me. Behold, the 25 dollar bidet:
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=pd_sim_hi_2?ie=UTF8&refRID=07ZMSJTZAVP20ZTZHFT6
Bought this guy for $30. If/when it breaks, we buy another. It gets the job done!
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/
What? I bought a bidet for $25 off Amazon and installed it in 15 minutes.
This is the one I bought. it uses the same water line as the toilet and it just hooks up to it.
30 bucks from amazon and no need to tear out his toilet.
It has changed my world of pooping.
I believe it varies, based both on personal preference & the type of bidet you are using. My wife & I use a model that just attaches onto the bowl itself (http://amzn.com/B003TPGPUW). I spray without wiping, then dab with toilet paper: both to dry & to make sure I'm truly clean.
For the best $30 you will ever spend, you can have that feeling every morning.
Yes! Total game changer. I have this one and it has served me well for 2 years! https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/
I would seriously use like half a roll of toilet paper before I got a bidet. Ridiculous. Sometimes I find that once I spray off my butt it paves the way for more to come out which I think was my problem. 😂
I also have a squatty potty because I take pooping very seriously. 💩
Try flushable wet wipes. Your life will never be the same.
Also bidet attachments that you can put on top of your toilet.
Y'all are welcome.
Your solution lies not in which consumables to buy, but rather in reducing your requirement for them. In the case of toilet paper, install a modular bidet system on your toilet. After you've relieved yourself, activate the water spray. After that, the job of toilet paper is to dry your already-clean arse. The bidet will pay for itself in terms of reduced consumption of toilet paper. Mine has paid for itself many times over.
I was inspired to try it after reading about it in these posts:
>http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/180f95/what_is_your_best_dont_knock_it_till_you_try_it/c8agzdt
>http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/1c7dmy/poop_marker_the_bane_of_my_existence/c9du6ot
They were right.
This makes me happy
sure
Yes sir lol.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B003TPGPUW/ref=mp_s_a_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1495084452&sr=8-2&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=Bidet&dpPl=1&dpID=31DZfu08OPL&ref=plSrch
On sale, too. Took maybe 45 minutes to hook up and that was mostly me looking for a good adjustable wrench
You can order one from amazon for $25.
Your asshole will thank you: http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1418861878&sr=8-1&keywords=bidet
In the US, you can pick up one fairly cheap at Amazon.
My family made fun of me when I bought it. They said that is GROSS!
A month later, it is the most used toilet in the house.
$27 with Prime.
Bidet is the way to go! A few years ago this one was recommended somewhere on reddit, I bought it and love it (as a mom to a crohnie).
I have an older Consumer Reports on toilet tissue, I don't like Scott 1000 or Angel Soft (or Costco's version of it). I settled on Target's Premium Ultra Soft (or Ultra Strong, I couldn't really tell a difference) that was listed on my report as in the top 5 for dissolving/fewer clogs.
Finally, we also updated our (25 year old) toilets to American Standard Cadet 3 FloWise Tall Height 2-Piece 1.28 GPF Single Flush and haven't had a single clog yet in three years.
This will change your life: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_api_7axDxbCK08687
Super fancy expensive ones do. There are cheaper options out there that don't.
I use this one
https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW
and it's totally adequate. It's been a great value for $25. It has plenty of pressure range and even in winter it's not too cold.
It doesn't require electricity and it connects right on to the existing plumbing with no specialized knowledge of plumbing.
Seriously a bidet is pretty much a pressure water up your ass. They are only $25 and pretty awesome
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003TPGPUW/ref=oh_aui_search_detailpage?ie=UTF8&psc=1
That's the one I got, took all of 5 minutes to install. I can't imagine not having one now, just seems so unsanitary. I mean, if I got poop on my hands would I be content to just wipe it with a dry napkin and call it good?
This is the correct answer.
I got a squatty potty several weeks ago but TBH haven't found it to make a difference for me. I just have weird bowels I guess.
Installed a bidet attachment today, though. Total pain in the ass (heh) to install, since the toilet is right up against the vanity in my bathroom. No room to get in there, every goddamn nut was seized up, and then somehow I managed to break the fill valve in the toilet. When I turned the water back on, the cap on the fill valve shot off like a fucking rocket and I had a geyser of water hit me directly in the face. My husband ran out to get us a new fill valve while I wept. When he got back with it, I disassembled everything, put the new fill valve in, and then it all went in easy breezy and the bidet shoots water directly at my asshole with laser precision.
mine
https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW
I recently made two purchases which have rocked my shitting world. The first is the Squatty Potty - crappy name, good idea. It changes your pooping posture to one more like squatting, which means less pushing, less hemorrhoids and less wiping. After hearing about this, I tried for a while just putting my feet on the trash can and other things, but it's way easier and more comfortable to just get the stool (in my opinion). EDIT: Read closer and see that you're already squatting, but I still recommend the stool if you don't have one.
Second, I got a bidet attachment for my toilet. There are MANY to choose from, but I got the lowest priced one on Amazon and have been very pleased. This is a simple device that just provides a stream of cool water to your bum to spray off the poo. Then you use a bit of toilet paper or cloth (your bum is clean, so no poo stains to wash off) to just dry off.
Between the two, I barely use toilet paper anymore, and I also used to need to use quite a lot to clean up. The downside to these purchases is that I'm now completely spoiled at home and miss them deeply when I travel.
How to save on TP even more:
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1393984795&sr=8-3&keywords=bidet
a few months back, i installed a bidet, this model, on my shitter at home.
it's a little hard to "aim" at first, but i can't tell you how much i recommend this over regular old tp/butt wipes. i never realized how nice it was having a confidently clean butthole.
I have the Astor 1000 and it works great. Just a simple attachment to your toilet seat. Comes with a stainless steel braided line too. No heaters or other bells and whistles to break, just a plain and simple adjustable spray. Careful, the high setting will make you jump a few feet in the air. The heaters are not needed, you don't really feel the cold down there. I got mine on amazon for about $20. I will never go back to paper. http://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_udp_awd_mob DTH
For less messy amazon links you can extract the part after "/dp/" in
https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1484236719&sr=8-4&keywords=bidet+attachment
and make it:
https://amzn.com/B003TPGPUW
Or via smile link:
https://smile.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW
BEEP BOP
Plz send any recommendations via PM
Get a bidet attachment instead. It will quickly pay for itself in saved toilet paper and be much more forgiving to your septic tank.
They sell like $20 attachments on Amazon to install into the water line and attach to the rim. check it out
To the rim of the bowl!
They have them on Amazon. For about $35 http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1367895894&sr=8-2&keywords=bidet
this one is superb
Buy one. They're cheap and easy to install. It's been a game-changer for me. Wiping my ass used to be like cleaning peanut butter off a poodle. Not anymore.
I recently got this, it's very easy to install.
I now use 1 roll of toilet paper about every 1-2 months.
They are the best and you're missing out! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IDMo2ncT2D4
For the uninitiated, bidets are super cheap now and easy to install. http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/
I bought that one for my BIL so it’s no wonder he never thanked me haha.
I have this one Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_npy3Cb5BM1YVM
You'll never want to poop anywhere but home ever again
Want to improve your home life, be more hygienic, and save money on toilet paper? Buy a bidet on amazon prime for $27. I found out about these on another reddit thread last month, and I couldn't be happier with my purchase!
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1416441421&sr=1-1&keywords=bidet&pebp=1416441425308
This is a great thread for discussion. If I may add...
This is the one I bought.I call it my ass blastor.
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_gI8OCbD595A0B
Here you go. Cheap and easy to install. One of the best purchases I have ever made!
Just get a bidet attachment! Super cheap, no shower head unthreading needed. And you’ll always have a squeaky clean undercarriage!
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_ycbTAbDRQRNFH
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW?ref=yo_pop_ma_swf
You low brow non-bidet users. Let me ask you this. If I were to wipe shit on your forearm. Would you grab a dry paper towel to get it off and be satisfied or would you wet it a little bit to ensure you were clean? For the sake of humanity, I hope you agree that you would wet it. So, why is your asshole any different? You can buy this bidet for only $25. It has 6,600 reviews at 4.5 of 5 stars. Installs on your toilet in 10 minutes.
You should tell your Father in Law about these;
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1405868292&sr=8-1&keywords=biday
These would help him to stay clean during the week and reduce irritation to his sensitive areas.
Salam
Jazak Allah Khair for helping him out. No need to get angry. Remember that what you teach him will be written as a reward for you every time he does it. It's a great opportunity to gain a lot of rewards.
I am not sure about which you are talking.
If it's about Wudu, then explain to him that we are taught as Muslims to not waste water. And that getting water to where it should be is enough (i.e., in Wudu)
If it's cleaning up after visiting the bathroom then maybe you could consider [this] (http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1404518306&sr=8-1&keywords=bidet) Or maybe swing by Home Depot and explain to them that you want to install a water spray bidet. It's very doable and here is a [video] (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4sT_wfTv7UI).
Good luck and May Allah reward you.
Here's an example There's a nozzle inside that you can adjust back and forth for a higher/lower aim. There are dials on the side that control force and temperature. It's just a stream with a little force. It's very controlled. I've never had or have known of any incidents where it went or sent somewhere or something it shouldn't have.
This is what I got. It's great and only took 15-20 minutes for me to install. I kind of wish I got one with warm water hookups (around $60) for the coming winter.
Who needs toilet paper when you can install one of these in less than 5 minutes?
https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B003TPGPUW/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?qid=1374472410&sr=8-3&pi=AC_SX110_SY190
Connects in between the water line and the tank. No more poopy butt.
I have two of these and I'll never go back.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003TPGPUW
You can buy a 24.99 bidet attachment on Amazon that goes under the seat, easy to install uninstall and move even when renting. I've brought one of these with me to a hotel before--5 min install coming in, uninstall on the way out.
https://smile.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B003TPGPUW?psc=1&ref=ppx_pop_mob_b_pd_title
Just installed this bad boy today. Super easy, took about 20 minutes.
I had pretty much the same reaction, with one minor difference. I had a brief, high-pitched scream at the beginning (described by my neighbor as "hyena-like"). That was followed by a mad scramble for the spray control knob, then another few seconds of unsticking my now wet shirt from my back while I repositioned for round 2. From that point on, though... exactly like yours.
Pro tip: it doesn't matter how tough you think you are, do not start off on the highest setting. You need to work your way up to that shit.
You can thank me later
https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B003TPGPUW/ref=mp_s_a_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1487050647&sr=8-2&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=bidet&dpPl=1&dpID=31DZfu08OPL&ref=plSrch
This is the exact bidet I use, it's even on sale.
Bidet user reporting in, clean and sparkling booty all year round.
I bought mine 3 years ago for $50, now they're half the price from the same company. Very reliable, just don't ever EVER go full pressure directly in to the tender pink donut.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B003TPGPUW/ref=mp_s_a_1_1/189-6266294-5835306?qid=1456849573&sr=8-1&pi=SX200_QL40&keywords=astor+bidet&dpPl=1&dpID=31DZfu08OPL&ref=plSrch
Nope American. A friend had brought it up that he got one recently and it was great so i decided to go for it. Got this one. They turned out to be cheaper than I thought they would be and it works great.
Shoutout for the toilet bidet kit. A stool makes you a prince, but a bidet makes you a king.
> You can buy an attachment for a normal toilet?
yes.
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1369275128&sr=8-2&keywords=bidet
They aren't motorized, they use the pressure from the water pipe to shoot the water at your poop hole. I have one similar to that and it works fine. The heated ones seem nicer, but cold water won't hurt you and it'll wake you up in the morning.
This.
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1380741332&sr=8-1&keywords=astor+bidet
the nozzle isnt in the water, it connects to your water line not the bowl water. and every bidet ive used/ seen has the auto retracting nozzle so its never exposed unless its on. best 25 bucks you could ever spend right here
Well, to be fair, you can get a simple bidet on Amazon for $25. In the long run, it'd end up costing less since its life span is certainly longer than toilet paper.
Or you could get this amazing bidet! I actually bought this after another redditor posted it on a thread years back. Changed my life. Plus it's less than $30 and it was super easy for my husband to set up.
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1453479944&sr=1-1&keywords=bidet
Not OP, but I have this one and it's awesome!
Oué c'est un truc comme ca.
Invest in a bidet attachment for the home commode and that number will decline sharply. Plus, it's much cleaner.
Easy to install and 27 bucks from Amazon - http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/
you can actually get a really cheap bidet attachment for your toilet on amazon, it is also very simple to install, here are the two types I've seen:
I have hemorrhoids. These will save your damn life.
I pretty much went to the Amazon top-rated ones in the category; I got this one first and it's great, then when we built another bathroom next to my bedroom I bought one of these because I was curious about the warm water (it's nice, but it was a bit more difficult to install and takes time to warm up anyway). Both of them were a lot cheaper when I bought them 3-4 years ago; it looks like the top-rated one right now is this; I can't personally speak about it but the ratings are good. :)
Also I forgot to mention in my first post: toilet paper lasts basically forever. Using four to six squares just to dry off it takes me over three months to use a single roll.
Just be straightforward and honest after finding a calm, neutral time to bring it up.
I'm a big fan of coming pre-loaded with solutions whenever I confront a problem (at least to get the ball rolling), so maybe you could buy some flushable wipes (like baby wipes but not for babies) ahead of time and set them on the back of the toilet/otherwise nearby. Love those things.
Or try out a bidet toilet seat attachment...wistful sigh
Problem solved
$25
I have this one. Works fine. Don't worry about the cold water, it's not a big a deal as you're thinking.
Don't think about it, buy it.
I'm just going to leave this here
I got one of these. One of the best purcheses I have made from Amazon.
Try one? Nah. Tell her to fully commit and get one at for her own thrown. $20 on Amazon. Worth it.
Nope! This is the one I have at home and it works great.
Inexpensive version: Astor Bidet
This one is fairly cheap.
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_SFidAbZVPDWG4
Im going to change your life....get this. And never ever ever deal with itchy ass, dingleberries, etc., ever again.
Well jump in, buddy, may the toilet be your oyster: http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1406316166&sr=8-2&keywords=bidet
Go with the bidet, it's only $25 and a 5 minute install. When you're done using it, you should only be using TP to dry yourself off.
Flushable wipes aren't actually flushable and end up causing problems for everyone.
> http://amzn.com/B003TPGPUW
When it's off, it's off completely. No dripping. I advise not doing what I did when we first got it, which is turning it on without actually being seated on the toilet. The spray is forceful enough to hit the wall across from the toilet. Shocked the snot out of me, because I was expecting a gentle water fountain-esque thing like is in the packaging's photo. Nope.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003TPGPUW?ie=UTF8&force-full-site=1&ref_=aw_bottom_links
Because everyone deserves a clean anus.
best money you'll ever spend
Of course! Right now /u/fillup420 and I have the Astor Bidet, it was $25 on Amazon and it is seriously amazing.
Stay away from the high-pressure setting though. We use that to clean our mirror on the other side of the room.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003TPGPUW?psc=1&redirect=true&ref_=oh_aui_search_detailpage
Easy to install too. Took me all of 20 minutes? Maybe 30 minutes. Needed an adjustable wrench and that's about it.
Make some time for yourself. Plenty of time. Get a bottle of lube and a smaller size dildo. (Not a hard vibrator) cover your bed with towels. Slowly start to play with yourself. Find what feels good. Keep a slow pace. Remember that your exploring. After sometime, your going to feel a warm comfort come over you. Your going to want to speed up. Go into the shower and continue picking up the pace. It might get messy. (I suggest buying bidet)you can use it before, during and after. You will feel an orgasm build. It will be like no other. Don't force it. If you get there, congratulations. If you don't, try again in a couple of days. Once you get more comfortable with your body, start involving your wife again.
I have two different add-on cold water-only bidets:
Both are less than $30. Installation is easy for an existing toilet.
Tell it like it is, sister!
I got a $27 bidet attachment from Amazon, hooked it up in about 20 minutes with a pair of pliers. Now I never get that "not so fresh feeling". Also good with the poops.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003TPGPUW
This is very relevant
This conversation never happened, also spend the frickin $40 and see what it does for you, the fact is it shoots a stream of water out, you can move your butt around to a degree to get greater coverage, I say give it a shot if you have any kind of disposable income, they're pretty simple to hook up too.
Option 1
Option 2
Buy one of these for your home
https://smile.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/
Use the wipes when you have to go out of the house.
For us, day 10 things started calming down with less urgent bodily alarms to hit the bathroom and the return of more normal density, thank goodness. As of now, I actually feel like my inner workings are functioning better than pre-keto, which is surprising. I really hope things calm down for you soon!
As a side note Someone in r/keto recommended this little godsend to literally save our butts during the process. It really helps as I completely understand how clean up can become a literal pain in the ass.
https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW
Or this one that's half the cost.
I've bought a few of these over the years and they are worth every penny! Your burning butt hole will thank you. Had some people laugh but later came to me and said they bought one too and love it. Haha! https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_other_awd_9QeNwbV0WBVEP
It's pretty regional. I'm sure I saw something about how in India/Pakistan they use a bucket and cup to clean up. I've lived in a place with these installed since before I can remember. Now we've got something like this. Obviously washing well afterwards.
I never thought I'd be discussing intimate hygiene with random people over the internet.
It happens. One of the first threads I read here was regarding "things you never knew you needed and can now not live without". Bidet was on the list. Can't be without mine now. Added benefit of reducing TP consumption by 50%
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_other_apa_-xEzybGQGV9D1
I agree. The future is only 35 dollars.
Your ass will be forever clean
Too lazy to install it on my toilet.
With that being said, a bidet is super easy to install and is only $24.95 on Amazon.
It can be upgraded: http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/
About the price of a 48 pack of toilet paper rolls.
just get one of these and call it a day
The only downside is burning cold water right on your butthole in the winter.
There was another about a couple who has a poop sponge they would attach to one of these to wipe... They were so proud of their ingenuity too
Also they would re-use the poop sponge. Honestly though all people should get a bidet, we should not be wiping our asses in 2018, we have mechanical robots that will wash them for us for $25 on Amazon.
This might be tmi but have you ever used a bidet? I got one on Amazon like this that hooks up to a normal commode. It's pretty forceful even on the lowest setting and you can really get it blasted into nooks and crannies. For that fresh clean feeling! And it's not a bad way to wake up in the morning ;)
https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_5?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1495438124&sr=1-5&keywords=bidet
Can personally say this was both easy to install and very beneficial.
Sorry for the delay, but it's this one
If you're re-doing your bathroom, maybe a fancy mom-level bidet is in the cards for you, but a year ago or so I bought one of these Astor Bidets from Amazon. $25, I feel at this point, everyone should be blasting their asshole with water. Super easy to install, seems to be a laser guided, heat seeking water stream as it hits the spot with stunning accuracy.
Has variable speeds, but full blast is total hole destruction, unnecessary. The downside versus a pro-bidet is the water is cold only, I'd imagine warm water bidets feel amazing but surprisingly, the cold water isn't bad at all.
It's a gamechanger, best $25 I ever spent.
DO NOT shave with a razor or even clippers/buzzers. The first day or two might feel nice, but MARK MY WORDS, the next 6 months to a year will be the worst itchiest hell you have ever experienced.
Get some mirrors, take some adderall and go at it with scissors is your best bet.
ALSO, you can get a relatively cheap bidet (~30$ and up) that attaches to a standard toilet from Amazon. This thing changed my fucking life.
https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1475189629&sr=1-1&keywords=bidet
I have this same issue. You probably have some minor constipation and could benefit from more water, more fiber, maybe some metamucil. This is happening because your poop is too hard.
My solution (in addition to the above things) was to purchase an over-the-toilet bidet. I have this one, and let me tell you: it is life changing. My butthole is so clean, no more hemorrhoids, no more itchy, scratchy, stinkiness. It's like a localized shower for your anus whenever you want.
It's easy. I used a wrench and a socket set and I think a flathead. I'm not very "handy" and I got it installed perfectly with no problems. This is the one I added to my other toilet:
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_q.aBxbNSS18MT
I don't know why the price went up like $40. Seems it's only available via third party sellers right now. Look up similar ones. They're all pretty much the same.
As for guests seeing it, my dad fell in love with it so I ordered him one last year for Father's Day. My gf was apprehensive then admitted she liked it.
O mejor consigue una de estas.
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=zg_bs_6810564011_1
Te preguntaras como pudiste vivir sin eso toda tu vida.
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=zg_bs_6810564011_1
So this is a little outside the box, but have you ever thought about a bidet? Here is one that is less than $30 and you will end up cleaner than using any type of paper. If you use the bidet at home, you can probably stand the paper at work. At least you won't have to use paper all the time.
No because while the water turns off, the nozzle also goes back in the guard. It all happens in one motion. Also your asshole is pretty far away from the nozzle unless you have a prolapse anus 😂
The one I use is the Astro Bidet and it works so well for $25. I know it sounds like an ad but honestly, after getting the damn thing, wet wipes became a thing of the pass and I use far less toilet paper now as well. Only use it to dry myself. Also has pressure control so you can control how much pressure the nozzle is giving out, just in case you are having a very very bad stomach virus giving you the runs.
LISTEN TO THIS
go here: http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?s=hi&ie=UTF8&qid=1463877684&sr=1-1&keywords=astor+bidet
This is a bidet. I don't care what pre conceived notions you may have about using it. I went through the same shit you did until I got this. No matter how bad your movement, this will clean you up in 5 seconds. I went from using a roll of TP in a day to taking about 7 seconds to use the bathroom daily. It's easy to install and easy as fuck to use. If this is as big of a problem as you say it is, get this and don't look back.
One was ordered from Amazon, Astor and the other one I found on chance on clearance at Kohl's department store. I don't recall the brand and not at home. But that one I like better, it's very similar but has more pressure.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_xN.hAbYHQT2YE
Edit: found it, I recognize the logo.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00FX1D55I/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_HR.hAb8N3KC3Q
Here's an electric one, on the lower end of the price scale since electric ones can be really fancy and get up to like $800+
Here's a really basic mechanical one.
For either type, you need to make sure that the shape/size of the bidet matches up with your toilet. Most mechanical ones are cold water only, which can be a bit uncomfortable. Some mechanical ones have a hot water hookup so you can temps but that would require additional plumbing on your end. Most electric ones use only cold water and have an electric heater in its storage tank. Some have timers/sensors. Some heat the water faster than others. Both types can be just rear (butthole) spray, or a combination rear and front (for ladies, or taint). But, the rear-only option can still be used by women for the front, with some creative maneuvering.
Get a bidet. It cleans it right up and only wipe once or twice.
~$25
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_ikfIxbM06JQH6
Have one of these? 110% recommended; I've convinced half a dozen friends to hop on the bidet train.
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1407862685&sr=8-3&keywords=toilet+seat+bidet
I just saved your sex life.
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_qny5xbC8NYBV4
Like this:
https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 - - Amazon.com
https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_LdhLAbZBPA5DT
Talk to your oncologist first but you may want to get on some probiotics. Chemo really kills the gut flora and sometimes a little push (probiotics / yogurt) can help get things back on track.
Also we ordered this to help with hubbys post-chemo & post RPLND bathroom time, and it's been great. Highly recommend.
Good luck!
Ja japansk scifi-toa med tusen knappar och neonljus är en lite annorlunda upplevelse.
Och det finns snikversioner att montera på vanlig toalett.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003TPGPUW/ref=zg_bs_6810564011_1?ie=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=FZYAQXYPHWDMZHM4JKRH
Easily the best purchase from Amazon I've made all year.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003TPGPUW/ref=oh_details_o00_s00_i00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Oh they have ones that mount between the toilet seat and your toilet and then connect to your toilet's supply line. That's the kind I have.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003TPGPUW/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o00_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Yes, this happened to me frequently. Best advice I got was to use a bidet to replace wiping. So happy I did. Water is the best solvent for this kind of cleaning and you don't have to use dry scratchy paper that never really gets it done. It was a game changer for me. I don't feel civilized without access to a bidet. Less than $30 on Amazon. http://smile.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B003TPGPUW/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1420015165&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX200_QL40
You can get ones that attach to any toilet.
Edit: here is an example
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B003TPGPUW/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1419888920&sr=8-1&dpPl=1&dpID=31DZfu08OPL&ref=plSrch&pi=AC_SX200_QL40
I bought this bidet because of a similar reddit thread years ago! I never thought I'd be a water-spirtzing type, but it really is awesome.
Get it, install it, own it.
Got this bad boy for 25$ and it's been great. Sent it out for 2 housewarming gifts and it gets raving reviews.
It is an add-on bidet they are a life changer. Makes your booty feel like royalty.
A little over $20 but I think we deserve a bidet.
I mean, who doesn't want the cleanest booty in town??
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B003TPGPUW?cache=999cfb60cffa90a794b61168e7e189d6&pi=SX200_QL40&qid=1406552821&sr=8-2#ref=mp_s_a_1_2
Do you dislike using a wipe when it is more dried out then the others? Conversely, what about the ones at the bottom of the pack that are wetter?
Have you considered this? OK I'm done [4]
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B003TPGPUW?cache=2cd08f4fad6a68b2827bb58efac0613c&pi=SX200_QL40&qid=1404177910&sr=8-1#ref=mp_s_a_1_1
This one right here.
Just curious, I was thinking of buying this:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003TPGPUW/ref=gno_cart_title_0?ie=UTF8&psc=1&smid=A2U3XBAMXKHMHK
Do these things really help get you cleaner?
Only time ever happened for anyone I know is when we intended it. For example, daring someone to get squirted in the face. That was the day after last Thanksgiving, I'll add. I'm in my thirties. We're all pretending to be adults, I think.
Anyway, it's a narrow stream and pretty much just hits your dirty bits. If you're interested but not convinced, get a cheap add on one for your current home. The Astor bidet linked below is $25 and installs in 15 minutes or less. Try it out.
https://smile.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B003TPGPUW/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1467593353&sr=1-1&pi=SX200_QL40&keywords=bidet&dpPl=1&dpID=31DZfu08OPL&ref=plSrch
The top rated one on amazon, Astor CB-1000 Bidet. I dont think it was a prime day sale, but I did in fact buy it on prime day.
I got this astor Bidet on a recommendation here in this sub. I hooked it up in 5 minutes, no tools. It works just fine-- for the price (~$25) I'd say it's pretty amazing.
I'll tell you what is so very helpful during these times is this simple to install (10-15 min) bidet attachment for your toilet. works just just like it should so you aren't endlessly wiping your butt sore. (that and my squatty potty and magnesium glycinate) have improved life for me.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003TPGPUW/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o03_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
While I'm not a doctor, may I suggest you try a bidet attachment for your toilet? I was having similar issues, and this inexpensive bidet really changed my life, and my butthole.
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1368714690&sr=8-1&keywords=astor+bidet
https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_4?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1526527435
There's usually 1-2 inches of feces in the anus even after a movement, you can reduce your chance of cancer as well.
The important thing is to pat dry, and not rub.
Bro if you like clean b-holes then get one of these. Changed my life.
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_awd_YOddvb0TQNFAT
I to suffer from shag carpet hiney!
Solution:http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1367974027&sr=8-2&keywords=bidet
Buy her a bidet toilet attachment. This will give you the chance to talk at great length about how clean it gets you. That will start her thinking along those lines. You may have to get yourself one first then act like it's the second coming of Christ to justify getting her one too. I have one it's awesome you'll feel cleaner than you ever have before and you'll hook your girl up at the same time. They are cheap on Amazon.
Tada
Y'know, I understand the merits of various designs, but I'll take my North American toilet + bidet attachment any day. No squatting. No mess. Very hygienic.
It’s a fancy one, yeah. Heated water, blow dryer etc. It ran me about $300. I have another one upstairs which was $25 and has no frills, but works just as well. Here’s one like it:
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_3SlQCb9WG3S2P
IMO it’s better than a hose because your hands are completely out of the way.
Like this?: https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1505423996&sr=8-1&keywords=astor+bidet
If so, it's stupid easy and takes five minutes tops.
Yeah, I've got one of these on my toilet, it's great. cut my TP budget by 95%.
Jesus OP... get a damn bidet and clean your asshole with water, they're only like $30.. or if your showerhead is near your toilet use it.
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1335081075&sr=8-1
honestly, the bidet attachment I got is a fucking life changer. I'll never own another toilet that doesn't have one. It's not even expensive, and with zero plumbing experience took me about 5 minutes to install.
Here, and, perhaps more frugalish, here : Easy installation, but you need 110 volt electricity for the deluxe ones, and save a lot on the TP.
Very similar to this
https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=s9_simh_gw_g60_i2_r?_encoding=UTF8&fpl=fresh&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_s=&pf_rd_r=5ZST950GQH8764J91MPC&pf_rd_t=36701&pf_rd_p=a6aaf593-1ba4-4f4e-bdcc-0febe090b8ed&pf_rd_i=desktop
But given what you two said, I probably shouldn't put warm/hot water through it.
Another possibility (if possible) is just getting a small reserve tank type thing to at least have room temperature water.
Ouu a proper bidet sounds cool, I'm just a Canadian chum. I use this lil guy , fills me up well!
This one is like 25$.
I mean, just to inform you--you can get ones that attach to your existing toilet, instead of being whole extra units of their own.
Also, baby wipes are nice.
A bidet.
You could also install a $25 bidet and remove the need for toilet paper.
Especially when you have installed one of these!
In case anyone in the US is looking to get a bidet on the cheap, head to Amazon.
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1415232914&sr=8-1&keywords=bidet
$26 is all you need.
I had a similar model in my old apartment. It took like 15 minutes to set up and it was easy to remove when I moved. It gets water from the supply line for your toilet, so be sure you're okay with whatever temperature that happens to be at. If not, spring for a model that has some mode of controlling the water temperature. A stream of ice cold water on your asshole is not pleasant.
Cheap bidet attachments can be added to toilets very easily and with a minimum of skill and tools.
Here's one such bidet: https://smile.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/
(that should be a non-referral link, I get nothing if you click it and decide to buy)
The main downside to the cheap bidet attachments is that they only shoot cold water up in your nether regions.
But they are a godsend if you have messy poops that normally require 50 wipes.
Also, close the lid when you flush, people! By doing so, you're reducing the spray of contaminated poop particles onto exposed things like your toothbrush, washcloth or glasses.
You should really look into getting a bidet attachment for your toilet. They're relatively cheap, ~$30 (link), for how much toilet paper you'll save.
lol well I'm sure there are ones that run into the hundreds. But the little bolt on ones like this are inexpensive. That one is similar to the one I have and it works great.
the water comes from the same source that fills the tank, you replace the hose from the valve to the tank with one that has an offshoot connected to the bidet (About the same dificulty as changing a showerhead to do) , there are ones that say they have tempature control IDK how I have a more basic one. anyway here's the cheap one I use
this one is AWESOME
I have This one no issues with the seat at all. Over a year with it and going strong.
EDIT: LOL i've had it exactly a year yesterday, just looked at my amazon order history.
Just throwing this out there for everyone. I bought one of these 2 and a half years ago and it's still going strong. Bullseye every single time. Women can even lean forward slightly and wash their mommy parts. I would pay triple for another if mine broke down.
https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_fkmrnull_1_sspa?keywords=bidet+atta&qid=1549648717&sr=8-1-fkmrnull-spons&psc=1 It's actually the top one on amazon.
I installed this one ($25) just recently. Took like 20 minutes.
http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1415847602&sr=8-1&keywords=bidet
OMG I love you!
The attachment is only $25 on amazon and works great.
There's a little shower head type thing that is retracted underneath the bottom of your toilet seat but like 8" down(The seats on these are pretty tall) and moves out a little and shoots up stream at like a 30 degree angle at your rear door and sprays it clean. It just all goes off you and down into the water. I've never had any on the nozzle thing or the bowl of the toilet. It's all a rather clean process. The water hose for it is split from the water hose that you have from the sink for drinking water, never from in the toilet....
https://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Attachment-CB-1000/dp/B003TPGPUW/
Here
well, I just bought one on Amazon.( http://www.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1301158445&sr=8-1 )
you don't need a plumber to install, it's very easy to do it yourself.
buy and install a bidet. It will pay for itself in 2 months.
This one
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_uJ5ZAbF4F9RGF
Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_y0w0xbQGGT6WS
Best $25 you'll ever spend, you asshole will thank you every day.
http://smile.amazon.com/Astor-Non-Electric-Mechanical-Toilet-Attachment/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=sr_1_2?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1408931827&sr=1-2&keywords=Bidet
this
This was the way to go.
I want to buy a product like this, but I worry that it'll just be dollar store quality, made-in-China, crap.
Here
$35 Bidet from Amazon, best anniversary gift lifesaver.
A while back I bought a bidet attachment for my toilet (only $35, including shipping from Amazon), and it works flawlessly, so as a result, they're all no wipe shits for me. A nice bonus was that when I recently fucked up my wiping hand, I didn't have to attempt to wipe with my other hand since I had the bidet to take care of everything. I'll never go back to wiping now that I've seen the light :)
Buy one of these. I have one and absolutely love it. I hate crapping away from home now.
Sure, this is the one we use in the guest's bathroom. The only difference is that the one we use in the main bathroom is electric and about twice the price.
I was going to mount it on the toilet, the kind that's like a water fountain, so all you need to do is turn it on, like this Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat Attachment CB-1000 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_Ap32Ab4FPKWE4
One purchase that I absolutely do not regret and has actually saved me at least double what I paid for it. Is a bidet. Those things that shoot water at ur butt and jiggly bits. I got one on amazon for $25 and takes a messy 20 minutes to install. And works like a damn charm.
It’s so weird and uncomfortable like the first 10 times you use it, but after that on man is it relieving and even on days when I have the sticky shits I get in and out with a single wipe. Im buying a regular 8-12 pack of TP like once every 6-8 weeks and that’s between both my GF and I
this is the one I bought
Get a diaper pail? If I felt like my bathroom smelling like shit, or using an excess amount of seal-able plastic bags to put my shit rags in, I'd just buy a bidet, or a fucking bidet attachment for 30 bucks.. Here's a review.
I'm not part of any kind of disinformation campaign, and I'm an engineer, not a paper/tree/recycling shill...
I was just pointing out that it's kinda crazy unless they're only using the remnants of the trees, and that I like the way the recycled paper works too prevent plumbing and septic problems. I promise I'm not just saying it for points or something. I used to get massive problems with clogged pipes before and even after we installed bidets on our toilets. The toilets we installed just after we moved in, because I'm disabled from my MS and I can't do the normal short toilets, so we got the new elongated Kohler ones. The pipes/house was still twenty years old though, and it had been owned by two other families before us. The biggest problem with the pipes was probably due to the most recent occupants, who treated the house very poorly because they were apparently angry at their landlord. Granted, the landlord was an asshole, but now I've got temperamental pipes even five years after getting many people in to fix them. So even after we installed the "addon bidets" to decrease the toilet paper usage, we still had some serious issues with clogged up pipes until we switched over to the recycled types of paper.
Actually, I am lying - this time I bought a case of Angel Soft Professional, because I found it on Amazon Warehouse for really cheap and I was in a rush to order it because we were in the process of moving back to this house after a stint trying to move back to North Carolina that failed miserably because I picked the worst rental property in all of Chapel Hill... So this time I ordered this "Angel Soft Professional Series" (I got it on Amazon Warehouse, but this is a Sam's Club link because it was what came up when I googled it, and contains a bit more detail on the "more details" page than the Amazon product page does). So this one's still working with the septic without issues, contains only 20% post-consumer recycled content, contains 80% "Sustainable Forestry Initiative-certified" and "Forest Stewardship Council" certified pulp, and it's good enough to use after the wannabe-bidet.
Sorry, I forgot to mention that the wannabe-bidet I keep mentioning here is this one from Amazon, we paid around $20 like six years ago when we for it, it's now $24.95 or $23.50 on Warehouse. It's "good enough", severely decreased our toilet paper usage in general, and they've been totally functional for the whole 6 years. We've got three and even detached them and brought them with us to the rental in Chapel Hill, then moved them back, and haven't had any problems with any of them (knock on wood). I had no experience with bidets prior to this except for a few hotels we've stayed at afford three of those "heated butt super cleaning machines" that was linked by the OP of that top comment, so we got these three instead. They're great, cheap, and severely decreased the toilet paper usage and plumbing issues - and combined with the Angel Soft (or the full recycled one I used to use that I can't remember the name of), they've completely eliminated any plumbing issues, clogs, and having to pump out the septic as frequently.
I'm sorry if I offended anyone though, that really wasn't my intention. I'll link this comment on my original though, in case it helps clear anything up. Sorry for appearing to be a shill for recycled paper though, I really didn't mean to in any way.
And the next best thing is
Step your game up my stank-ass brother. This might just change your life and bring you into the 21st century.
Or this if you're down to drop an extra $10 for a slightly nicer version.
If i'm reading between the lines: you can't get fully clean and it makes your ass hurt and itch?
Invest in a bidet! They changed my life. Amazon has basic models for under $30. That linked one is the one that I have. Just make sure to install it with teflon tape on EVERY connection or it may leak.
iRobot Roomba 960 Vacuum Cleaning Robot + Dual Mode Virtual Wall Barrier (With Batteries) + Extra High Efficiency Filter + Extra Sidebrush + More https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003TPGPUW?ref=yo_pop_ma_swf
Heated seat is sooooo nice but I went cheap since this is my first one and I wasn’t sure if I’d like it
Ok fuck all these dudes with their pussy ass little crystal. Everyone who's had major sweat knows that shit don't work for shit. It's for little girly sweat glands.
Here's the real guide.
Unlike what these mouth breathers say, killing your ability to sweat is far more important than what your fucking diet is.