Reddit reviews Expecting Better: Why the Conventional Pregnancy Wisdom Is Wrong-and What You Really Need to Know

If she would like, she can have a glass of wine or something and just nurse it the whole time, or water it down, mix it with juice. At 10DPO, the placenta has not yet developed (maybe haven't even implanted), and the placenta is how alcohol and nutrition is transferred. At that stage, the embryo is not getting it's nutrition from mom, it's getting it from its own supply. Many consider it safe to drink at least until you see that positive test.

For more info, check out the book Expecting Better! It's got lots of info on studies and research on these kinds of things.

Edit to add: If she still isn't comfortable with drinking, of course, that's ok too - you could swap drinks or do the ol' spill into the sink, tell people she's got a headache and alcohol will make her feel worse, bring some really tasty sparkling cider to drink instead... lots of things you can do! :)

I'll plug Expecting Better - sounds like it's up your alley.

This topic was also discussed in /r/BabyBumps a month or so ago - maybe there's some help in the comments for you? http://www.reddit.com/r/BabyBumps/comments/1zcgh2/bump_books/

This book is also relevant: http://www.amazon.com/Expecting-Better-Conventional-Pregnancy-Wrong/dp/1594204756

I bought Expecting Better by Emily Oster after reading a ton of positive reviews about it from girls on here. So far, I love it and I'd recommend it to anybody whose pregnant!

Isn't there actually very little evidence that small amounts of alcohol affect development?

http://www.amazon.com/Expecting-Better-Conventional-Pregnancy-Wrong/dp/1594204756

Good one!

Oster's book "Expecting Better" is one of the books I hand out to friends when they announce a pregnancy.

This was my favorite book prebaby: http://www.amazon.com/Expecting-Better-Conventional-Pregnancy-Wisdom/dp/1594204756

Actually provided the science and the data behind all the different advice and rules provided.

Chiming in to say that it's impossible to predict this, including for yourself for future pregnancies. It's really different for each woman and each pregnancy.

That said, regardless of where you gain weight, it is not "unnecessary". In addition to gaining the weight of the baby, uterus, placenta, increased blood volume and breast size, your body is storing up fat as energy for making milk. This is incredibly important, because at 108 pounds you probably don't have a lot of excess fat lying around. So I'm not saying to go eat an extra bowl of ice cream each night (which, ahem, I have been doing a lot of), but continue eating healthy foods when you're hungry. Keep in mind also that gaining too little weight in pregnancy generally has worse repercussions than gaining too much (see Expecting Better for more information and sources on that).

Pregnancy and childrearing books are funny. Seldom do you see review distributions with such bipolar ratings!

http://www.amazon.com/Expecting-Better-Conventional-Pregnancy-Wrong%C2%97/dp/1594204756

Competence at applied statistics?

http://www.amazon.com/Expecting-Better-Conventional-Pregnancy-Wrong-/dp/1594204756/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1376484454&sr=8-1&keywords=emily+oster

9 weeks here, and yep, it's hard not to be irrationally anxious. We've read plenty of sensible stuff, and we know that we are doing everything we can to play it safe; but it's still hard not to dwell on tiny little things.

My main advice, on thinking about it, is to try to de-stress by talking to someone about it - not your wife, necessarily - you don't want to add to her stress levels! But find a close friend, ideally one who has been through it before, and 'fess up and talk to them about it.

We've decided to tell a handful of people at this early stage, because really we value their support; and if we (heavens forbid) do lose the baby, we'll need their support anyway. We aren't telling people far and wide until after the week-12 scans; we don't want to have to un-tell people if things go wrong. But talking to a handful of close friends is the essential, IMHO.

And hang in there - it's terrifying to know that there's a 15-20% chance of miscarriage in the first trimester; those are way worse odds than for anything else you are likely to do! But also, those odds are mostly due to hormonal or biological factors - not to do with whether you used bug spray or ate the wrong food. I'm guessing there's a higher risk from worrying about bug spray, than from the bug spray itself.

If you want specific advice, as others say, avoid just googling. There are some good books out there - I'm really enjoying "Pregnancy for Men" for a lot of details for modern dads; also "Bumpology" for evidence-based scientific information about the real risks involved. I also hear good things about "Expecting Better" but haven't tried it yet.