Reddit reviews It Feels Good to Be Yourself: A Book About Gender Identity

I highly recommend It Feels Good to Be Yourself: A Book About Gender Identity. It’s written for about that age, but I think it’s great for anyone.

There's a book coming out in a few weeks which looks like it might be exactly what you have in mind - It Feels Good to Be Yourself: A Book About Gender Identity. It's fairly unique in that it includes non-binary individuals; most of the children's books with trans characters are specifically MtF or FtM. The only other one I'm aware of is From the Stars in the Sky to the Fish in the Sea, in which the main character is implied to be intersex and genderfluid, and uses they/them pronouns. (However, the metaphor of also being lots of different animals can be a bit confusing to young kids; I've found this to be true with some of the other more metaphorical stories out there as well, such as Red: A Crayon's Story, Not Quite Narwhal, and Neither, although those are all fantastic books!). There are also a couple other non-fiction books, Who Are You? The Kids Guide to Gender Identity and The Gender Wheel, which are probably a bit too complex (and preachy) for a 3-year-old but might at least give you some ideas. The authors of Gender Wheel also just released an alphabet book focused on different pronouns called They, She, He, easy as ABC which would definitely work for his age. As you pointed out though, it's much harder to find books about trans parents than trans kids; I don't think I can really help you there, as the few I'm aware of are self-published and not very well written or illustrated. The closest thing I can think of would be Introducing Teddy, in which the main character's teddy bear comes out as trans, but it's a binary transition, so may not be super helpful. There are lots of good picture books showing diverse family structures though, which you could definitely elaborate on. Sorry I can't be more helpful, it's definitely a major gap in the world of children's books that will hopefully be filled soon!!

Sometimes people look like boys when they're little, but then they grow up and it turns out they're really girls on the inside, or they look like boys when they're little but later it turns out they're really boys.

There are also some books for young children that explain what it means to be trans in an age-appropriate way, which may be helpful. E.g., When Aiden Became a Brother, and It Feels Good to Be Yourself.