Reddit reviews Life Without Ed: How One Woman Declared Independence from Her Eating Disorder and How You Can Too
We found 7 Reddit comments about Life Without Ed: How One Woman Declared Independence from Her Eating Disorder and How You Can Too. Here are the top ones, ranked by their Reddit score.
McGraw-Hill
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Life without Ed by Jenni Schaefer.
Another helpful book, A Parent's Guide to Defeating Eating Disorders by Ahmed Boachie. This shows parents the difficult task they have if they really want to help. However, if someone's parents don't "get it" this book won't help, and if the person with the ED doesn't want to live without ED, the parents really can't help.
I feel you here, just came from that dark hole about 8 months ago. While I wasn't a small as some, I did weigh the same as I did in the 6th grade.
I hate sounding like such a bro, but lifting weights saved my life.
My biggest problem and probably your biggest concern right now is the whole "gee, I know I have an issue (that I need to gain weight) but I don't know what I should do. I don't want to get fat but I need my period back."
Knowing that I need to eat for my weight training helped me turn my life around. I gained 30 pounds (some fat, some muscle) so far in my training from around January. I hope to compete in my first powerlifting competition in October.
But I know, realistically, not all people are ready for that immediately. Heck, I definitely wasn't, but here's what happened to get me there:
It is really hard to kick bad habits. When I get stressed, I tend to shut down and get really indecisive about what I eat. Over time, I have found, that if you have a good reason for gaining weight, you will gain it and it will not bother you as much.
If you do not do lifting (which it isn't for everyone, I know) I at least recommend the bulleted steps I went through. In summary, these are counselor (they could help you get a nutritionist--if you got to University, these services could be free, they were for me), reading those books and other self-help books, and telling people. The more people you tell, the easier it is to have an accountability system.
I consider myself someone who has fought it. I believe in you can too, OP. Ever need to talk or a friend, message me. I'd love to listen.
Life Without Ed https://www.amazon.com/Life-Without-Ed-Declared-Independence/dp/0071422986/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?keywords=life+without+ed&qid=1570768680&sprefix=life+without+&sr=8-1
14,000 Things to be Happy About https://www.amazon.com/14-000-Things-Happy-About/dp/0761181806/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?keywords=14000+things+to+be+happy+about+book&qid=1570768746&sprefix=thinks+to+be&sr=8-3
The Wish List
https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0761107568/ref=dbs_a_w_dp_0761107568
Power Thought Cards: A 64 Card Deck https://www.amazon.com/Power-Thought-Cards-Card-Deck/dp/1561706124/ref=mp_s_a_1_1_sspa?keywords=louise+hay&qid=1570768837&sprefix=Louise+&sr=8-1-spons&psc=1&spLa=ZW5jcnlwdGVkUXVhbGlmaWVyPUFLQUk5SktaRkFQMDEmZW5jcnlwdGVkSWQ9QTEwMzk3NDVENTdNWUtINjJRNUomZW5jcnlwdGVkQWRJZD1BMDU1NzIwMzIyMzU4VEZZTllETUQmd2lkZ2V0TmFtZT1zcF9waG9uZV9zZWFyY2hfYXRmJmFjdGlvbj1jbGlja1JlZGlyZWN0JmRvTm90TG9nQ2xpY2s9dHJ1ZQ==
Zen as Fck: A journal for practicing the mindful art of not giving a sht https://www.amazon.com/Zen-Journal-Practicing-Mindful-Giving/dp/1250147700/ref=mp_s_a_1_7?keywords=calm+the+fck+down&qid=1570769032&sprefix=fuck&sr=8-7
Live without Ed is a great book. Puts the ED in a character (his name's "Ed") you can respond to and eventually live alongside and choose to not listen to.
Good luck :)
Boyfriend of a recovering ED person. She has been in recovery for about a year now, and nothing comes easy with it. It is daily that she has to remind herself to keep with the program and that even when she falters, she has to get back up and get back on track.
If you are looking to recover (and congrats to that!), here are a few good first steps. You will need to find yourself a treatment program. I would suggest be starting out by going to the doctors, tell them you are bulimic, and then they will be able to recommend to you a specialist and/or treatment programs in your area. Also, do not keep it a secret anymore. By telling your friend and family will make you accountable and will be telling yourself that you in fact have a problem. This will also open the door for better support from your loved ones.
Also, please keep in mind that you need to do this for yourself and not because others are wanting you to recover. As the boyfriend, this is the hardest thing for me do do is to leave the recovery to her because I always want to fix things. She has become stronger for it though.
Also, here is a good first book to read. This book is written by a recovered ED person and it really gives a good perspective into the life and recovery involved. http://www.amazon.com/Life-Without-Ed-Declared-Independence/dp/0071422986
Again, congrats on making the first step! Just make sure not to give up. It is a long road ahead, but it is well worth it in the end.
I agree with /u/xXChocowhoaXx. I doubt there is much you can do. Eating disorders are usually way deeper than they seem, and aren't as simple as not eating enough lunch or whatever. I would put the most effort in to helping her get some help. It might be a little too upfront, but I have a close friend who had an eating disorder and she told me about Life Without Ed, and said she really liked it.
Though if you wanted to take a stab at it, you can put her height, weight, age, sex, and activity level in a tdee calculator and get how many calories she should eat. That will tell you how many calories she should eat to maintain her current weight, but it will also give you a BMI. You should then increase the weight in the calculator until the BMI is in the healthy range, then use that as the # of calories she should be eating to maintain a her weight at a healthy BMI.
As far as foods, I would go with calorie dense, easy to digest stuff. When you're malnourished, macros (like protein or carbs/fat) are nowhere near as important as overall calories. Calories are king, macros are queen, and micronutrients, source of the food (organic or not), etc are all... um, jesters? :P So I would emphasize calories over stuff like protein. The fitness wiki has some good stuff on diet. A trick with caloric density is to eat fats. Fats have 9kcal/gram as opposed to carbs and protein which only have 4kcal/gram. So for a given weight of food, you get over twice as many calories by eating fats as opposed to carbs/protein. Oils, while they aren't the healthiest thing in the world, are super calorie dense and can be snuck into foods really easily. 1tbsp of olive oil has 110 calories, and it's pretty much flavorless. Easy to add to stuff to up the calorie count. Peanut butter is also really calorically dense - 1tbsp has almost 100kcal. Another trick might just be to find out whatever she likes and will eat, then just make a ton of it or find ways to increase the calorie count.
Here's the thing, and it's hard to acknowledge - you CAN. And more importantly, you need to. Yes, you may feel you know yourself, but right now you don't know what you are capable of doing - because you feel you can't.
By saying that you are "all or nothing," and that the "in-between" is impossible, you are admitting that your mind is in an incredibly unhealthy place right now. And more often than not, an unhealthy mind is the reason we all gain weight in the first place.
You're wasting your teenage years hating yourself? You won't love yourself any more if you lose the weight because then you're loving yourself with strings attached. "I will love myself as long as I'm this weight." "I will love myself as long as I never binge." That's not love, that an ultimatum. That's abuse.
Take a deep breath, and then another, and another. Try this exercise - imagine if you were your little sister, or brother, or someone younger than you that you love dearly (even a young version of you). Imagine that they've just come to you crying, because they hate themselves - is it because of their weight? Other issues? What would you say to that person? How would you comfort them? What beautiful parts of them are they blind to that you see? You would want to take care of them, right? Make them happy, and help them see what an amazing person they are.
That's how you should start treating yourself - with love, with understanding, and most of all, with forgiveness. You're currently holding yourself hostage, and punishing yourself for stepping out of line. Stopping that will take time, but again... it's part of your journey.
Please, please, please do me a favor and buy or borrow this book from your library - it's called Life Without ED, and it's a book about overcoming eating disorders. http://www.amazon.com/Life-Without-Ed-Declared-Independence/dp/0071422986
Whether you feel it is true or not, binging and purging are not easy to overcome and for many (and many on this board, myself included) it is a lifelong struggle.
Next, if you're currently in school, check with the school nurse and see if the school employs a nutritionist - what you need now is to STOP counting calories and learning how to get back on track with eating, and learn how to be okay with eating.
But most importantly, please realize that you CAN.