Reddit reviews The Power of a Positive No: Save The Deal Save The Relationship and Still Say No
We found 7 Reddit comments about The Power of a Positive No: Save The Deal Save The Relationship and Still Say No. Here are the top ones, ranked by their Reddit score.
Bantam
The Power of a Positive No
This was one of the best self-help books I’ve read. It’s not “it’s hard to say no but you just really need to say it sometimes even though you don’t want to”, it’s more like “what’s the alternative if I don’t say no; why do I want to say no” and is really helpful for understanding relationships.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/0553384260
Alright well all those books on negotiation that the MBAs were readings? Get a couple. People are a pain in the ass so:
Power of a positive no
http://www.amazon.com/The-Power-Positive-No-Relationship/dp/0553384260
3D negotiation
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/1591397995/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1426162478&sr=8-1&keywords=3d+negotiation&dpPl=1&dpID=41zewhv9BfL&ref=plSrch&pi=AC_SY200_QL40
And of course
Getting past No - for when they are especially thick
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0553371312/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1426162632&sr=8-1&keywords=getting+past+no&dpPl=1&dpID=41nqwjOnSiL&ref=plSrch&pi=AC_SY200_QL40
Just remember facts don't matter and sometimes explaining yourself isn't always the right path.
OP, here's what you need:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0553384260/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1484097874&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=the+power+of+positive+no&dpPl=1&dpID=51UVThy7okL&ref=plSrch
You need to be able to say No to people. It doesn't have to be aggressive, they just need to know when to stop. You are part of that culture, and you are helping to keep it going.
Start with The Power of a Positive No by William Ury.
The book, "The Power of a Positive No" would help you a great deal. It's by an internationally famous negotiator (Ury), who says if you can't say "no," you can't really say "yes" either. He shows you how to say "no" in a way that preserves the relationship. Basically, say what's important to you that you have to say "no", then say an unambiguous "no", then propose something to continue the relationship. It's worth a read.
He may perceive that others will like him more for doing favors. He may believe that he is valuable because of the services he renders. Whatever the reason(s), your friend has the capability to say no, he just chooses to say yes.
There are lots of self-help books on the topic. "Your Perfect Right" and "The Power of a Positive No" are both geared towards men.
The psychology behind difficulty saying no is complex and rather irrelevant. Your friend does not have to understand a behavior in order to correct it.
Thank you beccccca52. I really don't want to give advice or recommend a book, if is those are agreements /r/alanon follows. At the risk of offending traditions, I'd like to recommend http://www.amazon.com/Boundaries-Face-Difficult-Conversation-Avoiding/dp/0310221528 which outlines our rights and methods for setting up an intervention with boundaries and http://www.amazon.com/Power-Positive-No-Relationship-Still/dp/0553384260/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1371573140&sr=1-1&keywords=positive+no+Ury
these have helped me protect myself from highly dysfunctional family members I love, love to help and believe I am responsible for.