Reddit reviews The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert
We found 2 Reddit comments about The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert. Here are the top ones, ranked by their Reddit score.
While no two marriages are alike, Dr. Gottman's findings have shown that all happy marriages have certain characteristics in common. Dr. Gottman describes the seven principles that make up an emotionally intelligent marriage, each one providing the foundation for the next. This handbook also offers easy-to-understand advice that addresses the five big marital issues: Work, Kids, Money, Sex, and Stress. Filled with questionnaires, exercises, and games, this is a practical interactive program for all couples interested in making their love last.
I recommend you pick up the book 7 principles to make marriage work by the Gottmans.
And maybe see a marriage counselor. You can go without him.
Communication for Mr BGW and I varies wildly. Sometimes we do a lot of emailing and can’t call for months, sometimes it’s very one sided, sometimes it’s one sided on the other way....phone calls irritate me because he’s not very talkative and I feel like I’m dominating the conversation with inane chatter about stupid stuff [the following are real examples from this last deployment] “so the strawberry field down the way opened a stand and I got a flat of strawberries for $5, FIVE BUCKS! I have so many strawberries I don’t know if the kids can eat them all before they go bad, other than jam what does one make with strawberries?” and when I ask him how he’s doing or what he’s doing he’s like “work. The usual. Tool control.” That’s it, babe, took control? That’s the highlight of your week? Like I know you’ve got funny stories, I sent you a shit ton of Easter eggs and candy for you to hide around your shop on Easter, tell me how everyone reacted? But he writes very good emails, and says he prefers to listen to me talk, so....I guess it’s what works for us. When I deploy I can’t ever get to a phone easily so it’s less of an issue trying to force a decent phone conversation than when he deploys.
You aren’t being selfish but he’s got a lot of stuff going on, especially depending on his job.
Some other stuff we do—read a book “together.” Watch the same series of shows “together.” This gives us stuff to talk about on slow days (cause I know he DGAF about strawberries). The book 8 dates has some good exercises in it that could be modified for emails.
Good luck.
You need to work on yourself not just losing the weight. You are a whole person not just the number on that scale. Are you someone who is worth hanging out with? Are you a kind and fun person? I am also obese. I got a gym membership and I got a personal trainer. It's going to take me a while to lose this weight and I need to change my diet and it's really the diet change that trips people up because you have to change your relationship with food. Also, I recommend you read books on relationships, this is a book that helped me. https://www.amazon.com/Seven-Principles-Making-Marriage-Work/dp/0609601040/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=John+Guttman&qid=1562688169&s=gateway&sr=8-1
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It's about marriage but I think what it says is applicable to non-married persons.
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Focus on you. Who do you want to be? What kind of partner do you want to be? Do you want to be in a relationship? If so, what kind? You are the central issue in your life because you are the one living it.