Reddit reviews Writing Better Lyrics

In the book "Writing Better Lyrics" (link below) it addresses how fundamental it is for a pleasant scheme. Overtly over-using "hard rhymes" is annoying to our ears and akin to listening to Dr. Seuss.

Soft rhymes (mouse/ground, note/hose, life/dice etc.) are much less obtrusive to the flow.

That said, a hard rhyme is sometimes necessary.

All goes back to preferences. I knew a drummer who felt that the end of every line should rhyme. And I know a bassist who (for a period) felt that any rhyme of any shape or form was detrimental, and that other literary devices like alliteration would be preferable. Ultimately, neither of them sang their words. The bassist has since begun singing, and thus rewriting on the spot.

http://www.amazon.ca/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779

1. Highly recommend this book.
   
   
2. Go for specific imagery and storytelling. "Still looking at this gift you gave me" is better than "Girl I'm sad you left me".
   
   
3. Find a theme for the song that is not just the emotion you're trying to work with. For example, "sad because of a breakup" is a subject matter, not a theme. A theme would be "life is strange" or "you can never keep something for long". Then, don't necessarily make the theme a lyric in your song, but try to draw out images and ideas from the theme. If you do that and the song still really needs you to actually state the theme, you'll know. Sometimes it works, sometimes it's a cliche.
   
   
4. Don't rhyme emotional words. Don't rhyme "mad" with "bad" or "sad" or "glad", for example.
   
   
5. One effective technique that's used a LOT is to make the verses specific and the choruses general, or vice versa.
   
   
6. Use the rhythm of the lyrics to emphasize emotional parts
   
   
7. Try to have some emotional development within the song. Not just a reflection of emotion, but some kind of journey or realization. I mean, a song about depression might work well as just a static droning sadness, but for most songs, this can be really powerful.
   
   Example, from an 80s hair metal ballad that was a big hit:
   
   
   VERSE
   
   We both lie silently still in the dead of the night (specific situation)
   
   Although we both lie close together
   
   We feel miles apart, inside (storytelling, relatable situation, specific scene)
   
   Was it somethin' I said or something I did
   
   Did my words not come out right (storytelling - you know exactly the emotion but all he's said so far is "feel miles apart inside")
   
   Tho' I tried not to hurt you
   
   Tho' I tried (storytelling)
   
   But I guess that's why they say (note how he interrupts the verse cadence leading into the chorus - adds emotional weight)
   
   CHORUS
   
   Every rose has its thorn (specific metaphorical imagery, asserts a theme (good things are always difficult))
   
   Just like every night has its dawn (familiar metaphor, also turns around the metaphor from the previous line)
   
   Just like every cowboy sings his sad, sad song (wtf? do they? I dunno. This line is just weird but for some reason it works for a hair metal ballad. but notice they don't go with "I feel like a sad cowboy" - they just show you the image)
   
   Every rose has its thorn
   
   Yea it does
   
   VERSE
   
   I listen to our favorite song playin' on the radio (storytelling, specificity)
   
   Hear the dj say love's a game of
   
   Easy come and easy go (listen to the song and notice how they use the rhythm to reinforce the emotional weight of this line, which also relates to the theme)
   
   But I wonder does he know (reinforces and relates to the story and a theme of distance - in the first verse, he's lying next to someone close to him and feeling far away - in this verse, he's listening to someone far away and wondering how they're feeling)
   
   Has he ever felt like this
   
   And I know that you'd be here right now
   
   If I could have let you know somehow I guess (notice how at the end of the first verse, they are wondering if they are at fault, and at the end of the second verse, they are admitting it)
   
   CHORUS
   
   etc
   
   In the rest of the song, they start leaning on more direct stuff "I feel so much pain" and "cuts life a knife...but the scar remains" and it gets kind of cliche. The last verse returns to the story, so the bridge being more direct kinda works in that way, but for me the success of this song is the first two verses and choruses. Seems like they got a little lazy about the middle of the song. Still a very successful song about a breakup, full of relatable storytelling, specific imagery, decent rhymes, good emotional use of lyrical rhythm, and a catchy chorus that sets off against the verses really well.
   
   EDIT: Also, check out the work that "Just like" is doing in the chorus. "Every rose has its thorn" is pretty much the opposite idea of "every night has its dawn" - but, by relating them with "just like", the song is creating this kind of philosophical malaise - all good things are kind of bad, all bad things are kind of good, the good is like the bad and the bad is like the good, and it's hard to even tell what's bad or good, just like people feel when they suffer a painful breakup. Checkout how much weaker it would be if it was: "Every rose has its thorn / But every night has its dawn". Totally different meaning, totally different song. That would be a song about how everything is going to be alright in the end. Relating contrasting ideas like that to get at an underlying feeling can work really well.
   
   
   

Check out this book: http://www.amazon.ca/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779/ref=dp_ob_title_bk

There are tons of writing exercises to get your sharpen your creative writing skills. I just started reading it and it's already helped a ton. There are a lot of exercises that need to be done in groups or with partners. If there's interest I could start a subreddit for these kinds of exercises.

Pat Patterson https://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779

> I'd much rather write and have a professional singer with professional studio equipment sing it.

A lot of guys do that. And I probably will too, least that's my goal when my skills are up to it. But I'm glad you told me that, if that's your goal then you should want to get better. A hobbyist isn't going to be willing to put in the work.

Anyway, after listening to em all I would give yourself more credit as a singer. A few vocal lessons with the right teacher could get you singing so good you'd surprise yourself.

Of the 3 originals you posted, all 3 have some pretty common issues that can be addressed. I'm not going to go line by line because really the lines can be arbitrary.

• Word rhythm - believe it not, the accentation(or lack thereof) in a syllable creates a rhythm that you can use to make more powerful lyrics. I just read about this a couple weeks ago in my rhyming dictionary but basic prosody rules apply. If you need a line to feel stable with the other lines, match the rhythm. If you need to create instability, change the rhythm (shorter or longer). Stability in word rhythm is how you get the sing-along effect.
  
  
• Rhyme - You can tell you wrote these as a teenager because you must have been coming up with the rhymes off the top of your head. A better approach I've found is to brainstorm some words that have to do with your hook. Then go to your rhyming dictionary (not a bullshit online one, no matter what anyone else says), and pick all the rhymes that seem to fit your theme. A good rhyming dictionary will also teach about the other types of rhyme other than perfect rhyme. You can also use this to create stability/instability, perfect rhymes are stable, the more dissonant sound the less stable the rhyme.
  
  
• Rhyme scheme - Setting up more a pattern to your rhyming will make it easier for the listener. See the above about rhymes but try out these rhyme schemes as there about the most popular in music today: ABAC, ABCA, ABCB
  
  
• Song structure - You did a better job than most posters here of having a chorus that sticks out. However, the songs on the radio these days almost always have a pre-chorus. Back in the day it was more optional but these days a pre-chorus build that has a hook in it is the way most hits seem to work
  
  
• Verse development - Here all the rules of story telling apply. You want each line to move your story along with a definite beginning, middle, and end (especially with country which it sounds like you're most close to). This is something else you can determine before you write the lyrics. I use a box method and a typical development could be I-You-We. Or even Aristotle's Pain-Fear-Catharsis. The way you were doing it, it didn't seem to be moving very far.
  
  
• Detail, detail, detail - Ralph Murphy says that our job as story tellers is to get the listener engaged in a story that never happened, with characters that don't exist, in a place that never was, and make em believe it because it relates to their own story. A lot of us make the mistake especially when we start out as using music as a diary, that's fine but that doesnt' make people want to listen to your song over and over. The trick is to use lots of details that can relatable to other people. So details are objects or typically nouns that help paint a picture in the eye of the listener. Use them liberally in your verses, sparingly in your choruses. The chorus is where you talk about how you (or the narrator) feel(s)
  
  I'll use one of the songs as an example of some of this stuff:
  
• hook/title: Just Another Broken Heart
  
• When I read that I see another non-unique way of singing a sad bastard song. One of the hardest things about our job is saying the same old thing in a fresh way
  
  
• rhyme schemes
  
• Your first verse sets a AABAA (counting assonance as rhyme), the next verse is ABBAA. And you go to ABAB in the chorus to mix it up, good job on mixing it up there but you want to keep the verse rhyme patterns the same. Also, try to stay away from couplets when you want to be taken seriously. AABB can sound corny.
  
  
• structure
  
• You have a Verse/Chorus/Verse/Chorus/Verse structure. Not one of the standard structure. Again, pre-choruses are the thing these days. And your first verse is the 3rd verse. I don't know if your first verse is strong enough for that. Additionally, is there a counterpoint idea that could balance the sadness of the rest of the song? Remember, contrast is the name of the game in songwriting.
  
  
• verse development
  
• the first verse deals with not wanting to wake up to the reality and face the pain. I like that. The 2nd verse deals with the fear of what you'll find. That's okay but you've already indicated that somewhat in your first verse. You're just restating it. And then the 3rd verse is a repeat of the first. And I don't know if your first verse is strong enough for that.
  
  ..k so I'm getting to have a wall of text here so I'll stop there. I think you get the point. The biggest hurdle an aspiring pro songwriter has to make is the realization that listener's don't give a shit about you. They care about how your song makes them feel. If you can elicit emotion in the right way you may been on to something.
  
  I would recommend, if this is something you're legitimately considering pursuing, that you consider joining Taxi.com. They're a company you can join (for a fee) that will pitch your songs to the majors. They can also give you advice on finding a studio to produce your songs. But more importantly, they'll give you reviews of your submissions for actual industry pros. At the very least you could learn a ton from their forums (http://forums.taxi.com) and watching some Taxi TV.
  
  Here are the books that I've probably learned the most from all most of my critique is based on:
  
  Writing Better Lyrics
  
  Murphy's Laws of Songwriting
  
  The Craft of Lyric Writing
  
  But that's just my 2 cents as a random guy on the internet.

https://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779

I know a few folks who swear by this particular book by Pattison: https://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779

Get this book: https://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779

Pat Pattinson is a professor of songwriting at Berklee College of Music. My friend studied with him and turned me on to the book. It includes a lot of exercises on how to get yourself thinking in terms of imagery/metaphors as you write, but it's specifically geared toward songwriting. The exercise my buddy often does as a warm up is a free-write. Pick an object like "Apple" and start writing a stream of consciousness about apples. Let your mind wander and just WRITE, it doesn't have to make sense. I'm typing this on a phone, but when I think of apples:

"old scraggly woman, arm outstretched offering tastes of her madness to beautiful girls; a snake winding up a tree, it's cold stomach scraping against bark as it sweetly whispers knowing hisses. Red but not round, paragon of fruits, mottled red and breaking like the earth cracks on a fault as the white teeth sink".

Lyrics and poetry are similar, but there are some nuances to lyrics. The number one I can think of is that people often write lyrics that are impractical to sing. The lines are too long (aside from meter, you'll run out of breath before you can finish the line), or include excessively complicated words (difficult to enunciate and control pitch at the same time). Think of a word like "splendiferous". Maybe you could write it in a poem, but you probably wouldn't want to sing it.

On songwriting specifically, Writing Better Lyrics by Pat Pattison

On harmony and melody, Writing Hit Songs by Jai Josefs
You may need to know basic theory for that one though

Do you struggle with the music or the lyrics?

Most people struggle to write good lyrics. Most people's first songs are pretty awful lyrically. You can improve with practice.

Pat Pattison is the professor of songwriting at Berklee College of Music and an incredible teacher. He does clinics and has published some books and videos. Write Better Lyrics is a great introduction into how to think about your lyrics.

https://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779

Grab a copy of this: https://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779

Lyric writing, like any type of writing, has to go through rewrites and rewrites and rewrites... and even then it might not be good. But it's the practice that counts!

This is what song #2's lyrics look like for me: https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B2DzuQtCAAAiaV2.jpg

If you want to read about lyric writing, I actually took an online course for it... not that I ever finished it, but the book that the course recommended (and that was written by the teacher), is Writing Better Lyrics. And if you're a poor, underemployed sap like me, there are other ways of acquiring that book, hint hint. I thought it was a great breakdown of song structure, how to tell a story within the short span of a song, etc... Worth a look, if you continue to have trouble.

I've been writing songs as a hobby for years now. Music comes pretty easy to me so I can just sort of hum or write melodies with ease, but I could never get lyrics + melodies to fit and create a great song. Then I read "Writing better lyrics" by Pat Pattison and have very little issues now. His methods are genius and honestly made lyric writing MUCH easier for me. I have read countless songwriting books and that is the single greatest one I've ever come across. If you want to write great lyrics, learn how to structure them melodically, and learn the intricacies of songwriting please read that book. He's also got a songwriting class on coursera.


http://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779

Buy the book Writing Better Lyrics by Pat Pattison off Amazon. Do everything he says. I just finished it, and I found it thoroughly insightful.

https://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779

This book was pretty helpful for me in creating more descriptive, tangible strings of words, along with a ton of other wildly helpful ways to create more meaningful lyrics:
https://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779


This one, which I've only read a few chapters of, has been pretty helpful in getting me out of my own way. If we just tell the truth about our experience as a person (the real truth, the one we usually just think), we'll be saying things that mean more, and are more universal than any surface level or constructed truth:
https://www.amazon.com/Writing-Poetry-Save-Your-Life/dp/1550717472

Dude check out the free courses on coursera:

https://www.coursera.org/learn/songwriting-lyrics
https://www.coursera.org/courses?languages=en&query=music

The guy who teaches the songwriting course has a few books with lots of good exercises in. I'm currently reading https://www.amazon.co.uk/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779/ and doing the daily "object writing" exercise. It's opening a lot of stuff up for me.

I would second this, I also read the books the guy who teaches that course wrote, it's a worthwhile perspective on the topic, this book in particular http://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1406294784&sr=8-1&keywords=writing+better+lyrics

Two things I'm finding extremely useful:

LinkedIn Learning course with Julian Vengard: https://www.linkedin.com/learning/music-theory-for-songwriters-the-fundamentals


Writing Better Lyrics by Pat Pattinson: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1582975779


Some people will say "write from your heart" but I'm learning that great songs have SO much more technique and theoretical wizardry applied throughout the process.

These two resources are just excellent. I've been a musician for 20 years and I forced myself to watch all the videos on the LinkedIn course - I learned useful things I wish I'd known years ago.

There can be A LOT of thought behind the inner structures. Pat Pattison's book may give you a lot of insight:

http://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779/

There's a free online course with him somewhere, too.

https://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1541606392&sr=8-1&keywords=write+better+lyrics


This is one of the best things I've done to enhance my lyric writing. If you follow the exercises in this book, you will surely see quick improvement. It will not be all you need, however. You still need to put in hard work before you will be able to write songs you really feel proud of. Good luck mate.

My pleasure! Ralph Murphy is a boss, met him for the first time my last trip down to Nashville. I would highly recommend a few cheap/free resources. Ralph Murphy's Laws Of Songwriting, Writing Better Lyrics - Pat Pattison (You can't really tell but both of these are hyperlinks, so go feel free to click on them), and www.coursera.com offers a free online lyric class. SAC memberships are like $35 for students, and then you can attend workshops free.

I think you can totally write downer characters, but again, give him a redeeming quality. Give us a reason to root for him.

As far as playing. You don't need to be a John Mayer or Elton John. A lot of the most successful writers I know are mediocre at best guitar players. If you can play acoustic guitar in time you have all you need as far as guitar skills. I mean the more you know the better, but you can get by with the basics. A bigger factor for the artist thing is having the "it" factor. It's impossible for me to tell from a recording if you have it or not. I know I don't have the frontman "it" factor. But when you see it you know. It's the confidence, the charisma, the ability to connect with an audience whether it be 3 drunk dudes in a bar or thousands at the ACC. I wouldn't concern yourself with the guitar stuff.

All the best!

this is really good man! if you would like this link is to a book that i used to help me write better. it really works
http://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1331524881&sr=8-1

good luck!

I have typically gone for #2 (at least those are the lyrics that have aged best for me).

I found the book "Writing Better Lyrics " by Pat Pattison to be immensly helpful when I set out to rethink my approach to lyrics.

The way I learned to write songs was literally "learn to play what you hear on the radio, then try and do it for yourself" and that's still largely what I'll do if I find there's something interesting about a track I've heard.

However, I did buy some books to give myself a bit more focus. Those books were:

"6 Steps to Songwriting Success"
"The Craft and Business of Songwriting"
"Writing Better Lyrics"

In the first two books I found some sections helpful, some sections blindingly obvious and some of no value. So, y'know, caveat emptor.
The last book is just excellent and I'd recommend it to anyone who wants to be any kind of songwriter.

If you're after a quick leg-up, what I'd suggest is:

Pick one song.
Work out the chords.
Work out the structure (e.g. verse/chorus/verse/chorus/bridge/chorus), noting how many bars for each section.
Throw the chords away.
Write your own chord progressions for the sections you noted above.
Write melody.
Iterate over the last two steps until you have something you're happy with.

Last point. It's hard to write something original, but if you start by writing unoriginal trash then (a) you're not worried about being original so you can work faster and (b) you get to grips with "what does writing a song involve". The more practice you have of writing songs the easier it will get and the more you'll feel able to experiment with playing around with form/progressions/melodies and so on.

For music I like: http://www.amazon.com/Melody-Songwriting-Techniques-Writing-Berklee/dp/063400638X

For lyrics I like: http://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1397613676&sr=1-1&keywords=writing+better+lyrics

Writing better lyrics by Pat Pattison
https://www.amazon.com/Writing-Better-Lyrics-Pat-Pattison/dp/1582975779