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u/Nexu101 · 2 pointsr/Christian

First of all, like others have said, ask her!! The topic of sex may make some Christians uncomfortable, but it's really important to be on the same page in relationships, and she'll likely appreciate the opportunity to explain her opinion on the matter. There are actually a lot of different perspectives on sex. Some stay chaste for life. Some think sex is inherently sinful, but needed to reproduce, and we'll be forgiven for it. Some think sex within the union of marriage is not inherently sinful. And some believe that premarital sex is okay too. Most Christian youths I've met believe that they should wait until after marriage to have sex, but I would venture to say that a third of them (or more) have had sexual experiences and will continue to engage in sexual activities before marriage despite holding this belief. So the lines certainly get really blurry.

I hope I don't offend you by saying this, but it's somewhat unusual for a Christian to be dating someone who's not religious because, as someone mentioned, 2 Corinthians 6:14 says that Christians should not be yoked together with unbelievers. I realize it sounds harsh, but for me personally, it rings true because my theology has profoundly impacted my personality, my interactions with others, my personal choices, my political beliefs, etc. This is NOT meant as discouragement! I'm only trying to elaborate on what others have said on the topic. For some couples, different religious beliefs have worked out okay. But it takes a lot of communication and patience. Another reason why I bring this up is that if she is dating an agnostic, she might have a different view on acceptable sexual activities before marriage than what I would consider to be those of mainstream Christianity.

So what is the view of acceptable sexual activity in mainstream Christianity? Generally speaking, many Christians would see vaginal sex, anal sex, oral sex, masturbation, mutual masturbation, and so on as unacceptable before marriage. Some may think that masturbation and oral sex are okay before marriage, but not vaginal sex or anal sex.

If you talk to her about these issues, try to avoid leading questions. What I mean by that is don't ask questions like "Do you think sex before marriage is morally wrong?" Ask questions like "What is your view on sex in relationships?" Listen to what she says and respect her decision. If she says she doesn't want to have sex before marriage, then as her partner, you need to help her do what she believes is right. If she says she is down for it, and you guys reach that point in your relationship, then great. Either way, support her.

On a side note, there are many different theologies concerning sex that I believe are valid even if they aren't compatible with my personal beliefs, so I understand what you mean when you say "depending on how Christian you really are," but the truth is, two very deeply religious and involved Christians can come to two totally different and well-informed conclusions on acceptable sexual activity before marriage.

I hope that this relationship has a positive outcome, whatever outcome that may be! I'll be happy to elaborate further on sex and marriage in Christian theology if you have any questions.

Also, here's a cool book on the topic if you're interested:
https://www.amazon.com/Sex-Soul-Updated-Sexuality-Spirituality/dp/0190221283

u/Hadashi_blacksky · 1 pointr/Christian

That's really sad. But you honestly don't need to worry. As far as I've seen, there very much is a God - and I say that as someone who has heard every atheist argument there is. The thing about atheist arguments, though, is that they rely on belief. You have to believe that the universe is purely made of atoms and that there is no spiritual dimension to anything. It causes them to reject evidence outright and pretend they are being scientific.

I'm not honestly sure what you found in other religions, but you should know that the spread of Christianity has had a profound effect on them. Before we turned up in India they would burn you alive on the funeral pyre if your spouse died. You should also know that in other religions, their Gods aren't even really spiritual beings. They're more like our concept of a super hero or super villein - and that is in the places where they don't just worship objects. It's like humans are wired with the concept that there is something more, but they go looking in all the wrong places.

If you would like to really delve into religion and find out more about it I suggest delving into Christianity too. You are not really going to learn about Christianity from atheists or agnostics. They have a very ideological view of it and they tend to twist things to fit their view. The best method of debunking their ideas about the Bible I've ever found is to read the quotes they give in context. Usually you find out they didn't read the line literally just before that one they are quoting! This holds true even for those atheist books - you should always check their quotes because they are hyper selective. They'll tell you the Jews practiced slavery, for example, but they won't tell you that it was a method of paying debts and that you are set free once the debt is paid. (Also, slave-taking the way we understand it was a crime)

If you want to take a closer look at Christianity, the theologian William Lane Craig has a really good free podcast series where he goes through the proofs for God: https://www.reasonablefaith.org/podcasts. But if you prefer books, here are a few. I have more as well:

​

Mere Christianity- and CS Lewis in general. He used to be an atheist, and he talks about it in depth. The Problem of Pain is a great one.

Letters from a Skeptic: A Son Wrestles with His Father's Questions about Christianityis a classic that is formed as a long question and answer between an atheist and his Christian son.

Let There Be Science: Why God loves science, and science needs God Is really good if anyone tells you that Christianity is unscientific. The actual truth is that science flourished under Christianity and there is at least one scientific experiment in the Bible itself.

​

And a couple on myths about Christianity:

Heresy: Ten Lies They Spread about Christianity

Galileo Goes to Jail and Other Myths about Science and Religion this one was actually written by a bunch of different experts - some of them atheists.

Thanks for reading, and sorry for the late response. I don't use this account much!

​

u/ninjoe87 · 2 pointsr/Christian

This verse is one I turn to when I'm feeling down in this sense.

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalm%2077

Psalm 77
For the director of music. For Jeduthun. Of Asaph. A psalm.

1 I cried out to God for help;
I cried out to God to hear me.
2 When I was in distress, I sought the Lord;
at night I stretched out untiring hands,
and I would not be comforted.
3 I remembered you, God, and I groaned;
I meditated, and my spirit grew faint.
4 You kept my eyes from closing;
I was too troubled to speak.
5 I thought about the former days,
the years of long ago;
6 I remembered my songs in the night.
My heart meditated and my spirit asked:
7 “Will the Lord reject forever?
Will he never show his favor again?
8 Has his unfailing love vanished forever?
Has his promise failed for all time?
9 Has God forgotten to be merciful?
Has he in anger withheld his compassion?”
10 Then I thought, “To this I will appeal:
the years when the Most High stretched out his right hand.
11 I will remember the deeds of the Lord;
yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago.
12 I will consider all your works
and meditate on all your mighty deeds.”
13 Your ways, God, are holy.
What god is as great as our God?
14 You are the God who performs miracles;
you display your power among the peoples.
15 With your mighty arm you redeemed your people,
the descendants of Jacob and Joseph.
16 The waters saw you, God,
the waters saw you and writhed;
the very depths were convulsed.
17 The clouds poured down water,
the heavens resounded with thunder;
your arrows flashed back and forth.
18 Your thunder was heard in the whirlwind,
your lightning lit up the world;
the earth trembled and quaked.
19 Your path led through the sea,
your way through the mighty waters,
though your footprints were not seen.
20 You led your people like a flock
by the hand of Moses and Aaron.

I'd also recommend picking up a daily devotional, personally I'd recommend Streams in the Desert, it's fantastic.

https://www.amazon.com/Streams-Desert-Graduates-Devotional-Readings/dp/0310282764

u/FriendofHolySpirit · 2 pointsr/Christian

I'm so glad to hear you are a Christian now. If you haven't heard of them before, this kid has an amazing testimony, just thought it would bless you since you were raised Mormon.

LInk here

Also, his mom, Lynn Wilder, wrote Unveiling Grace on their journey out of Mormonism. If you look her and Micah up on youtube there are lots of great videos. I enjoyed it! Glad to hear you have some good friends who are believers. I'd love to hear your testimony if you want to share. I pray God continues to bless you <3

u/arg211 · 1 pointr/Christian

So first off, just because someone put a Masons label on that version of the KJV doesn’t reflect on the KJV as a whole. The overwhelming majority of KJV Bibles have zero ties to Freemasonry (in fact it’s going to be a statistically insignificant percentage of KJV Bibles DO have ties to Freemasonry), and are probably the single most commonplace translation in the English speaking world. That being said, KJV would NEVER be my recommendation. We have learned too much about ancient culture and language since 1611 to consider it viable for study. NKJV is significantly better, but there are far better options.

That aside, there is no such thing as the single “true” translation. We are wholly unable to provide such a translation, even if you have complete knowledge of ancient Hebrew and Koine Greek (which is impossible to obtain) due to the context of the written Word spanning over 6000 years itself.

The most accurate English translation for academic theological study across the spectrum (not only by most individual denominational backgrounds but by secular academia as well) is widely accepted to be the New Revised Standard Edition (NRSV). Second most accurate is the most recent version of the New International Version (NIV). I would recommend a good study Bible in either translation (in other words, not a “specialized” study Bible such as the Wesley one that I really like a lot!) over anything else. If I had to pick a third best, I would probably say ESV for ease of understanding, but I would never use it for serious study, and it’s such a distant third for my own use behind the other two in my opinion that it’s hardly worth mentioning.

My personal approach is to use NRSV for academic and personal in depth study as well as sermon preparation and NIV for personal reading and readings during services

Edit to include a link: this is an outstanding NRSV study Bible on Amazon

u/RECIPR0C1TY · 3 pointsr/Christian

I think it is important to be a bit more clear. There is a difference between Col 3:2 (Setting your affections on the things above) or Philippians 4:8 (what ever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is... think on these things) and what you are describing. What you are describing is the “power of positive thinking”. In one case, positive thinking tries to make us be or feel better by changing the way we think. In the biblical case, changing our mind transforms us from glory to glory. In positive thinking, it is about what makes us feel or be better, in the biblical case we worship and glorify our God. In positive thinking we narcissistically put the emphasis on us, in the biblical case we focus on our Creator and all glory and honor is his.

This might sound nit picky, but I think it is important to make this distinction that the secular world and its atheistic or even spiritualistic mindset sees as self help. This differs in goal. The secular goal is about me, the Christian goal in changing the way we think is about God.

u/MattOnePointO · 2 pointsr/Christian

I realize this was posted several hours ago. If you subscribe to Amazon Prime, there is a great free video series title Tetelestai. This mini-series does an excellent job of bringing the old-testament relevancy to Jesus Christ. It has acting out of scenes and excellent narration making it very enjoyable to watch.


It does a great job orienting people to Christ and the Bible. Highly recommend watching this first and then see the parts you want to read directly later in the Bible.


https://www.amazon.com/The-Promise/dp/B07F9BH1D2/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=tetelestai&qid=1564482792&rnid=2941120011&s=movies-tv&sr=1-1

u/TomBombadil75 · 1 pointr/Christian

+1 For John Gottman's 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work. I just read it and was blown away by the solid advice backed by the science of decades of research/observation of couples in Gottman's Love Lab.

He basically says the Mars/Venus book is bollocks.

2 biggest take aways:

  1. You need to be each other's best friend. You need to know your wife deeply and be involved and engaged with her on a daily basis. Care about her life.

  2. Your wife and her needs are more important than you and your wants. There are a hundred different things that annoy her or that she wants a specific way and it wouldn't make any difference to you - so remember those things and do them. Even if you have to spend a little extra energy or time - do them. Happy Wife, Happy Life.
u/SeaRegion · 1 pointr/Christian

Definitely - here it is:

Neil Anderson - Freedom from Fear

It's a wonderful book. I struggled with anxiety issues for about 15 years and found freedom through this book. The author is a professional counselor and shows how to tangibly get rid of anxiety and trust in Christ. The book starts a bit slowly but ends powerfully on how to trust in God through the thick and thin.

u/NicholasLeo · 2 pointsr/Christian

When the great age of the earth was discovered in the 1800s, the discovery did not result in any religious backlash or rejection by the religious communities. Rather, it was received quite positively by virtually all denominations. Here is a great book on the history of geology that discusses how the earth's great age was received.

https://www.amazon.com/Earths-Deep-History-Discovered-Matters/dp/022642197X

u/[deleted] · 1 pointr/Christian

Hmm. There are so many to choose from. Perhaps the following will be enlightening to you.

http://www.amazon.com/dp/0875421849

or

http://www.amazon.com/dp/0380015390

or, if the above aren't enlightening enough, I highly recommend

http://www.the600club.com <---very good Christian spiritual literature.

Hope that helped :)

u/shad0fx · 2 pointsr/Christian

I was leading a Disciple class at my church for a while. As well as helping out with the church middle school youth group when I can. I've had to step back a little from helping out as much as I want to. I had hopes of starting a community game night at one point. Hard to put one together when I'm the only one pushing for it.

I've volunteered with cleaning up during the week, taking care of the prayer path last year. I'm always willing to help out what I can.

u/TroutFarms · 1 pointr/Christian

This is pretty much exactly what you're asking for. But it's a bit weird since it is a Catholic translation with all of the books you would expect in it but with a study guide written by protestants that doesn't exactly match Catholic teachings. You might be better off looking for a genuinely fully Catholic bible.

https://www.amazon.com/GNT-Student-Bible-Philip-Yancey/dp/031092720X

Maybe something like this might help you decide:
https://douglasbeaumont.com/2017/06/23/choosing-a-catholic-study-bible/

u/franz_karl · 2 pointsr/Christian

there is a book about this by david pawson here https://www.amazon.com/Once-Saved-Always-Perseverance-Inheritance/dp/0340610662

his summary is this

unless you wilfully reject God you are saved

since in this quotation one thing is missing:

>38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,

>39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

from the King james version

we ourselves are missing from this list so if we reject God then we are lost if we do NOT reject God and stay faithful unto the end then we are saved

u/HillsSeeker · 1 pointr/Christian

I really cannot add anything more except to say I am in the same boat.

There are two books I'd recommend. First Second

u/CJoshuaV · 1 pointr/Christian

That's kind of you. For your own reading, or others looking for an understanding of Christians sexual ethics that goes beyond fundamentalism, here are some resources:

- Good Christian Sex - Bromleigh McCleneghan

- Unprotected Texts - Jennifer Wright Knust

- Shameless: A Sexual Reformation: - Nadia Bolz-Webber

- Shameless: How I Lost My Virginity and Kept My Faith - Dani Frankhauser

- Just Love: A Framework for Christian Sexual Ethics - Margaret Farley (this one leans toward the academic)

- God and Sex: What the Bible Really Says - Michael Coogan

and, for a wonderful critique of the devastating impact of "purity" culture...

- Pure: Inside the Evangelical Movement that Shamed a Generation - Linda Kay Klein

u/HaiKarate · -4 pointsr/Christian

It really depends on how you approach the Bible. Fundamentalists tend to believe the Bible first, and then look for evidence in support of the stories. More moderate Christians are willing to let the evidence speak for itself, even if it contradicts the biblical account.

Most Bible scholars around the world try to take an objective approach. If you remove all theological assumptions about the Bible and try to prove what is true and what is not, what does it look like then? You take the conclusions of science, history, archaeology, literary criticism, etc, and apply them without trying to force them down the path of a particular point of view.

Here's an example of a story in the Bible that is at odds with the known evidence -- the slavery of the Jews in Egypt and the subsequent Exodus. There are many problems in trying to prove the validity of the story. First of all, Egypt did not keep a lot of slaves during the period in question. We know that the pyramids were built by Egyptians, not slaves, and they were given decent wages, the best medical care or the day, and a privileged burial site near the pyramids when they died. It was considered to be honorable work, not slave work.

The Egyptian government kept good records, and there are no mentions of 2 millions Jewish slaves. Egypt had an estimated population of 3 million at the time, so the loss of 2 million workers would have devastated their economy, but not a word of it in their records.

There has not been a single piece of evidence recovered from the Sinai Desert. Two million Jews in the desert, wandering for 40 years, and they don't leave any evidence? No altars, no pottery shards, no burial sites. God commanded that a whole generation needed to die in the desert, so let's say that a million died -- how do you hide a million bodies?

I could go on and on. Needless to say, the story of the Exodus does not line up with what we know about Egypt during the period that the Bible alleges that this happened. For more information, there is a book by one of the leading archaeologists in Israel today called, The Bible Unearthed, where he discusses in detail all of these problems. (Or if you prefer, the History Channel ran a 90 minute special on The Bible Unearthed, and the video can be found here.