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I'm glad you can at least recognize that there is a part of you that thinks you don't have an issue- 2300 is still very low. Plugging in your height and activity level to Active's fitness calculator suggests that you should be eating at least 2500, probably closer to 2800 just to maintain. And 2500 is for "low active"!! If you're going to a gym regularly I'd bet you're in the 'active' category.

>I still just seriously doubt that it’s anything worth anyone’s time.

Your life is worth it! There are many people who have made a career for themselves out of their empathetic nature that would love to be given the opportunity to help you recover. You sound very kind and worth it <3

I know you said you don't plan to seek help, but I hope you can at least someday recognize your strength and your worth.

It got admittedly super cheesy at a few points, but I checked out this book from my local library and really got a lot of good messages out of it!

Yeah!! Here's an example of one on Amazon: link

You are in my thoughts and prayers for sure! You can do it! Hahaha

I've heard good things about this one but haven't tried it! I was thinking of switching to it from ensure so if you try it let me know!

Purely Inspired Organic Protein Shake https://smile.amazon.com/dp/B07KRHRS6Z/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_IX5wCbS2W9PCX

Sure! Here's what I've personally tried so far.

Sunergetic Brand. I've purchased this brand the most and it's what sold me on the supplement in the first place. Though, $20 might be steep for some people for only 240 capsules. (At four capsules a day, that's a 2-month supply.)

[NOW Foods](NOW Supplements, Psyllium Husk 700 mg, 180 Capsules https://www.amazon.com/dp/B000MGR2T4/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_mriODbHPW9MF7). This is a well known brand and a good "try and see" option, imo. If you don't see the desired results, then you're only out $10 for 180 capsules, with Prime. The dosage is slightly lower, as well. They also offer a loose powder version that's excellent for keto baking recipes.

When I'm running low again, I think I'll see what's available outside of Amazon. I haven't checked GNC or Vitamin Shoppe, but I'm hoping they might offer something that's more .mg-per-pill at a reasonable price. I should warn you that these capsules are not small, and four of them in one sitting can be un-fun if you're less than a stellar pill-swallower.

Most of the bottle instructions will tell you: Always chase with an entire glass of water!

Electrolytes are soooo important, especially if you’re restricting heavily or doing very low carb. I take Oxylent everyday and when I forget to take it, I feel shaky and dizzy.

I have to take colostrum & collagen for a health condition, and I’ve noticed that they really help with inflammation/muscle repair. Collagen in particular has really improved my skin, hair & nails! I love to mix Primal Kitchen vanilla coconut powder with tea, coconut milk, and Jordan’s Skinny syrup; I’m currently drinking a delicious birthday cake flavored tea.

I completely agree with the vegetarian Better Than Bullion, I prefer the vegetable one as the "chicken" and "beef" taste to much like real chicken and beef and it kind of spooks me.

I make the broth and put in some soup mix I get at the bulk food store that has lentils, wild rice, and dried vegetables, or just some dried soup vegetables. That way I can adjust the amount of stuff in my broth and I don't have to worry about fresh vegetables going to waste sitting in my fridge.

Frontier Co-op Soup Vegetables, Deluxe 1 lb. Bulk Bag https://www.amazon.com/dp/B001VNKZQY/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_B42QDbXABNWFY

I only just eat plain old salt and no salt but I have bought electrolyte supplements before (https://www.amazon.com/Medique-03033-electrolyte-replacement-50-Packets/dp/B004IZA46S/ref=sr_1_10?ie=UTF8&qid=1543180781&sr=8-10&keywords=electrolyte+supplement+tablets) and I liked them, except I had to use like 6 tablet a day.

Oh I do that at work lol. Everyone is used to the crazy lady in the corner wrapped in a blanket in the middle of summer (they over air condition).

Mostly joking about the complaining. More like self-deprecating jokes.

But seriously my tea thermos is my life. It's this one, unfortunately current unavailable. But it keeps tea warm for hours, so I always have something hot to sip. Really makes a difference. Also tricks me into keeping myself hydrated lol.

Hmm I wonder how this ties into attachment issues. I've just started reading attached. It's pretty eye-opening.

"Hot Hands" are my friend, and now maybe yours too.

https://www.amazon.com/HotHands-Hand-Warmers-Odorless-Activated/dp/B0007ZF4OA/ref=sr_1_4?dchild=1&keywords=hot+hands&qid=1573576370&sr=8-4

Why not shakes? I feel like they keep me full longer and they seem to have a better calorie to protein ratio.

Muscle Milk (200 cal 40g protien)

Ensure Max Protein (150 cal 30g protein)

If shakes aren't your thing, the premier protein bars are decent!

Here is an Amazon link to buy enough Stevia Concentrate to make 200 x 60mL bottles of liquid stevia, for $35.00

https://www.amazon.com/Ozeri-Digital-Multifunction-Kitchen-Elegant/dp/B004101GQC

Nearly any drugstore. You can get them on Amazon too!

Some ramen packets will say for noodles and then noodles plus seasoning. It's generally very very low, 10 or zero calories.

Nissin Top Ramen Noodle Soup Chicken Flavor 3 Ounce Packages - 5 Pack https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00KGH9ERW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_tw20CbHVCV2AN

I have THIS electrolyte mix, which has basically no taste and no calories, though other mixes like Ultima do come flavoured (also no cals but kinda pricey). If you are purging it's really important to replenish because a lack can really mess you up. Another thing i like to drink after purging is coconut water for the same reason.

https://www.amazon.com/Good-Earth-Herbal-Caffeine-Packaging/dp/B000F6SNPS/ref=pd_lpo_vtph_bs_t_1/131-6370994-8071002?_encoding=UTF8&refRID=3FYGAYK7X9MDZK2P6NCB&th=1

i'd die for this shit

Just like so many of the posts in this thread, this one hit me head on. Even more so because it makes me remember a poem in this book of poems on eating disorders:
https://www.amazon.com/Sarah-Simon/dp/1950437507/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?keywords=sarah+simon+core+collection&qid=1565366658&s=gateway&sr=8-1

i am not quite a latte
but rather a cappuccino
who thinks she just wants a plain ol’ joe
no sugar
no milk
no
foam
.
.
.

but she is not just a plain ol’ jane!
it’s the perfection of shape that she seeks, a fantastic form. a body
that she thinks milk
cannot support as in
her bones
she becomes weak,
yes,
weak.

weak for lack of calcium
but still, so many bananas! her
“safe food”, plenty of
potassium

.
.
.

Try some digestive enzymes.

When I was in inpatient and resi we were all on digestive enzymes, colase, and miralax. The link above is the digestive enzymes they gave us in treatment. I was on two doses of miralax in the morning and the evening, one dose of colase in the morning and the evening, and a digestive enzyme thirty minutes before each meal.

Honestly the only way to fully get through it is to sit with the discomfort and eat more. The enzymes help. I thought that I was gluten intolerant (and I Am lactose intolerant) for the longest time but it was just because I was abusing laxatives and then getting constipated plus not eating for such a long time that my body didn't know what to do with the food. It was probably the worst pain I've felt in my life.