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I've had similar experiences. Growing up everyone else seemed to know how to be with each other and I was on the outside looking in. I retreated into compulsive daydreaming as a defense; imagining myself succeeding in social situations; being popular and well liked.

I've looked into how one gets this way. Here are some resources if you want explanations:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attachment_theory
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B009VJ4B4C/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1

You can learn to trust others, see the good in them, be kind to yourself, accept things as they are. Meditation is one way to practice anchoring yourself in the moment. I hope you find someone to trust who can restore your faith in people.

> Do we know what causes it? Is it associated with childhood trauma, etc.?

We don't know what exactly causes the condition. This article cites that Dr. Somer (whom I'll mention more about down below) drew a connection with trauma (in a paper he published on MD), since his six-subject cohort had all been sexually abused as children.

> Is any treatment in particular considered optimal?

Therapy. This can help identify the triggers and underlying causes of maladaptive daydreaming. Therapeutic techniques such as cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT) may help expose underlying issues. A therapist might also suggest useful coping techniques.

A case study of one individual with maladaptive daydreaming showed that fluvoxamine (commonly used to help treat OCD) was helpful in managing daydreaming. However, there is currently little research to support the use of drug treatments.

> Is there any especially popular book/website/video(s) about it?

This buzzfeed article is centred around the recount of a woman with MD (published October 2017)

While I haven't read it, this book seems to have been received fairly well by those who have

This video by a clinically licensed therapist talks about MD in comparison to Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID)

> Is there anyone who is generally considered the lead expert in regards to this phenomenon?

Dr. Eli Somer, a professor of clinical psychology at the University of Haifa in Israel, first identified the condition in 2002. He described it as "a disorder where people spend about 60 percent of their waking life in a self-designed imaginary world".

He did an AMA on this subreddit last October

Hope this helped!

Capture and escape is a common one according to this book: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00GKQJ8E2/ref=kinw_myk_ro_title

Its a cheap book and a fast read. Good for explaining this to therapists and doctors who won't listen to you. I am not selling it, it just helped me.

I daydream a lot about dancing and being a great ballerina. This falls into the "idealized self" common category according to this book.

If you want I can even virtually loan it to you, PM me.

Of the top of my head I'd say that if you have a tendency to lose focus on your child then you want to put some protocols in place asap to counteract that while you work on awareness and such. My initial thoughts would be:

A Tile (tap the app and it makes the tile "chirp"):
www.amazon.co.uk/Tile-Mate-Finder-Anything-Finder/dp/B01L3VEC08

Some type of beacon technology (here you can set a radius and the phone alarm will go off if your child leaves 30 meters etc):
http://blog.cubeacon.com/nivea-and-ibeacon-protects-the-kids-along-the-beach.html

One of those fitness apps that gives a warning if you sit still for too long - usually you'd set it to 30 mins so you dont get sedentry but you could set it to go off if your still for over 30seconds when you take your child out. This will get annoying but safety first right?


Hope that helps!

This is called "Rubber Band Technique", as given in one of these books

Freedom from Maladaptive Daydreaming: Self-Help Strategies for Excessive and Compulsive Fantasizing

Returning to Reality: How to Stop Maladaptive Daydreaming

I hope this method works for you :)

No, it’s a supplement you can buy OTC. It’s $10 for 100 pills (so 50 days). Here’s what I bought but there are many brands: Swanson NAC N-Acetyl Cysteine https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07F92YLRW?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share

Hey, OP. Don't know if you're still checking replies but here goes -

As MDD was only written about in 2002 for the very first time, there aren't any self-help books on it yet, especially since it's not in the DSM-V like "more serious" conditions such as bipolar and schizophrenia.

However, you can take your problems bit by bit and target them individually. You're already a step ahead with the meditation - I can't do it at all, my mind wanders; and if it doesn't then I just fall asleep lol. But moving on - targeting problems individually:

Anxiety? Depression? PTSD-induced need for escapism? There are books on that. What I'm suggesting is targeting the problem at the source - the symptoms and causes for the daydreaming to start. Think - do you think there is an ultimate cause for the need to disappear into your own world? Of course there is. It's a bit of an egg-or-chicken situation... one wonders if the dreaming started first and then caused problems socially and academically, or is it the problems that caused you to retreat into fantasy? It's most often the latter.

As for books, I bought this particular one in a half-assed (to be frank) attempt to try to help myself, to supplement my therapy - Higher Reality Therapy: Nine Pathways to Inner Peace . I only got through a couple of chapters, though, but it's a very interesting perspective on dealing with the greater picture of life in general. It draws on philosophy a lot in addition to psychology. It teaches you, as the summary says, "a 'Higher Reality' not only exists but awaits each of us, if only we allow ourselves to be as we were made to be." I really relate to you saying that you've already achieved everything you wanted in fantasy. This book addresses living life and making most of it.

I say this to every MDD person I meet on here - feel free to message me to chat or just rant. Most of us are lonely as fuck. We gotta stick together. :)

I have this problem for around 15 years now and it's not going away. There are ways I limit it but it will always be with me, I think. It has become part of my identity and I feel vapid without it.