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Well, I'm no doctor, but I've studied and practiced CBT for years. I'll link some guides and books below that are pretty good. But, essentially, CBT is all about paying attention to what you say to yourself and working to change it. What you say and think about is like a habit: you've been doing it for so long that it's become rather 'default' behavior. But, like a habit, it can be changed with enough time and work.

One of the very first steps in doing this is becoming aware of what you are saying. For example, like in the title of the post, when you call yourself a moron. Or the lines of thought, such as your friends leaving you. This is a major step because, for a lot of that self-talk, you probably aren't aware of it or your brain 'filters' it out, but it's hurting you anyways.

The next step is to start challenging what you say about yourself rationally. Try comparing them to this list. For example, when you have a fear about your friends leaving you, the first thing you should do is ask yourself why. Why would they leave you? What did you do? Then look at your answer and compare it to that list. Chances are that what you're afraid of is either unlikely or illogical. It can help a lot to write this stuff out on paper.

Another test that I like is to imagine that you're saying your 'self-talk' to someone else. Imagine you had a friend you really liked and trusted completely, they can be real or imaginary. Now imagine that friend is calling himself a moron or is saying that he's afraid his friends will leave him, or whatever self-talk you're giving yourself. Would you agree and call him a moron or say his friends will leave him (remember, you're supposed to really like this person)? I would guess probably not. It would just make him feel worse, right? What's important with this test is to realize is that that is exactly what you're telling yourself and it's making you feel just as bad.

After that, it's a game of watching what you think and doing the above until it becomes less of a problem. So when you call yourself a moron, you never let yourself get away with it. You ask yourself: why am I a moron? Why does X make me a moron? Aren't I allowed to make mistakes? Etc. Eventually, you'll start to become nicer to yourself and treat yourself like you would that good friend from above.

Feeling good by David Burns is pretty much the go-to, raw CBT book. It has a lot of worksheets and examples to help the reader. I highly recommend it, especially if you're just starting.

Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness by Gillian Butler is also a good book that focuses in more on social aspects.

Most of the online guides I've seen haven't been too fantastic IMO. But they do exist. This seems like a good overview, but definitely not as interactive or comprehensive as the books are. Personally, I'd start with David Burns' book. It's probably the most tried-and-true of them all.

Just take it one day at a time. I know living away from home for the first time can be scary, but you've made it this far and you can do this!

It's natural to wonder if you've made the correct choice, but try to take comfort in following the choices you have made so far. Just follow through with those choices. Going to school is almost always the correct decision to do, and since you left to go to school you're on the right path.

Just focus on your education and learn as much as you can in your classes. Get help from the professors or Teaching Assistants. Your college may even have free therapists if you want to get specific help. Be aware of all the perks you get as a college student.

Over the next few weeks you'll be establishing new routines and habits as you adapt to this new environment. It's going to be new and uncomfortable at first, but you will get used to it. I recommend exercise as a habit because it can be as effective as medication for keeping stress under control.

I'd also suggest trying to make friends. It took me a long time in college before I finally found a friend or two I felt I could trust and be myself around, so I feel a little hypocritical giving this piece of advice. But having someone to talk to can be very helpful. Check out what clubs your school has, you're bound to find something that interests you. And if you go to any nerdy clubs (Sci-fi clubs, writing groups, anime clubs, video game clubs) you might be able to ask around and see if there are other Bronies around if those are the kinds of people you are looking for for friends.
You can also always call your parents, I'm sure they'd love to hear from you too as they are also dealing without having you around.

But don't sweat it, you can do this!

sigh It really disappoints me that a solution that might actually help you is becoming unattractive to you because of the way these therapists are shoving it down your throat.

As someone who has studied and attempted meditation (with various degrees of success) for much of my life, I can say that you're not wrong to be frustrated with both meditation as a solution, and your therapists for not being helpful. Eastern meditation is becoming something of a fad in psychological circles, which I actually support, but it's fairly useless to just tell people to do it without any other useful guidance... Meditation can help with a variety of mental problems, but it requires continuous practice to really benefit, and a teacher or guide who really has experience with it is also really important.

Your own insight is actually something I'd recommend you do:

> If those things worked for me I could do them with youtube videos and books and I wouldn't need a real life therapist.

Well, why not look into YouTube videos and books? And yes, as much as I harp on people getting professional help for mental health issues, like any doctor, therapists can vary in quality.

I might recommend this book to you, it's a very good meditation guide for beginners:

Mindfulness in Plain English

Just remember that feeling frustrated with meditation and feeling like it isn't doing you any good is a common experience, you're not alone. You need to understand why meditation helps, and how to do it properly and with what attitude - a therapist simply insisting that you do it is not good enough.

Would you be a good piano player if someone just told you play the piano repeatedly? No. The same is true of meditation. It's an art, a skill that needs proper technique and regular practice to be effective.

Lately, I've been reading I'm OK--You're OK which may sound a bit cheesy, but I think it's actually a really good book. For example, it explains how/why even people who are "successful" and have "happy childhoods" can be messed up [emotionally] like anyone else. It's not a failure or something on anyone's fault to have problems they need help with. It's not selfish.

So anyway, maybe you'd like reading it. Or maybe not, but either way I hope you realise that you're enough & you matter. Good luck. I hope you feel better soon.

If you have a chance, read a book called The Black Swan.

http://www.amazon.com/The-Black-Swan-Improbable-Robustness/dp/081297381X

It's a bit technical in some parts, but it discusses how highly improbably events can have massive changes. How people meet their spouses/significant others is a good example. One of the things that encourages these black swan events is just getting out there and meeting people. You never know when you might meet the person you end up with. It might be at a convention, work, or a chance meeting at a library where you notice someone reading a great book ;) Plus, lots more options nowadays on-line ;)

You've got three good options, as far as I can tell:

1: Solve things with your boyfriend, get the romance back
2: Break up with your boyfriend. You have totally valid reasons for doing so. Also, you're 20 and almost done with college. No age is time to settle, but you've got way more life ahead of you... there's still partnership and romance and excitement and good sex for you. (I can remember thinking, years into a boring, dumb, slightly combative relationship that whelp, this was it, this is what people do. I am SO VERY glad I wasn't stuck there forever.)

You don't even have to try 1 first, but you can.

or:

3: Negotiate with your boyfriend and open your relationship up.

But pleeeeeeeease don't cheat!

http://www.amazon.com/The-Ethical-Slut-Relationships-Adventures/dp/1587613379/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1369187482&sr=8-1&keywords=The+Ethical+Slut

http://www.avclub.com/features/savage-love/

I think it would help if you learned how to properly converse with people. It could maybe be difficult since you'll need to do that with high schoolers but you should try it.

I have one such book: https://www.amazon.com/Have-Confidence-Power-Dealing-People/dp/0988727536/ref=sr_1_3?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1521227154&sr=1-3&keywords=how+to+have+confidence+and+power+in+dealing+with+people

There are more you could try reading. I would also recommend observing people's conversations as well to know how to go about them in practice. It's simple small-talk they engage in and just a chain of respond-and-speak.

As for how to start them. You sort of have to "break-in" to social circles and such. I would recommend just talking with people who have similar situations and after-school acitivites as you.

If you are new to programming I can't recommend python enough. I was able to pick up the language in a couple of weeks in high school and now I use it every day at work.

If you are feeling a little more adventurous get the book The Little Schemer. The book kickstarted my love of computer science.

What book are you using? I had trouble with calculus, though this book made it a lot easier. The price is a bit steep, perhaps you can find a different edition for cheaper. In any case, it is the reason I passed Calc 3 and many of the people I have let borrow it have said it is why they passed Calculus.

It's good that you haven't made up your mind about anything. Holding onto that mindset will make everything much simpler.

If you read much at all I'd recommend a very good book on the subject to you, an autobiography from someone who struggled with bipolar disorder herself. It's called An Unquiet Mind, by Kay Redfield Jamison. It should give you an understanding of what severe bipolar disorder is like, educate you on the dangers of it and present a strong case for medication. I can sympathise with being reluctant to go on medication, I was very opposed to taking any myself for my depression, but it can be a lifesaver.

Even if you decide after reading it that you don't identify with her situation at all, it's still an excellent read that I sure you wouldn't regret. It's a fairly popular book so if your school has a psychology department you might be able to borrow it from them (at least that's where I got it from), alternatively you can pick it up on amazon for £5.66.

 

Whether or not you decide to read the book you should ask for an appointment with a mental health professional sooner or later. I'm no expert but I think what you've said is cause for concern. Certainly enough that it's worth risking worrying your family a little to check. Not wanting to scare you, but if you stay quiet the worst case scenario is that you do suffer from bipolar, it gets worse and you end up hurting yourself. That would worry them a lot more, aside from being awful for you.

Mental illness is scary, but we'll always be here to help you through it. It doesn't make you any less of a person or any weaker than anyone else, and I'm sure your family will understand that.