(Part 2) Top products from r/TransyTalk

If you're into romance and erotica there are three excellent anthologies I can recommend written by trans people for trans people.

Take me there: Trans and Genderqueer Erotica

Trans/Love: Radical Sex, Love and Relationships beyond the gender binary

Nerve Endings: The New Trans Erotic

All three of these are really excellent and well worth reading. Very hot, very entertaing and wonderfully romantic. Some are cute, some are heavily sexual, hell one is about falling in love with a trans woman A.I. So there is stuff for everyone in these stories.

A couple thoughts:
-If you haven't already, I would definitely ask in a delicate way what language she prefers for her genitals / chest. For some trans femme ppl, dick or girldick is totally fine, others prefer clit, and some others may use junk or something else. Same goes for chest vs breasts vs boobs vs whatever. It's always best to ask, politely, before you're in a circumstance where you might say something that triggers dysphoria and kills the mood. This can also be a great way to ease into a more general conversation about likes/dislikes
-Even after these conversations, I would still check-in like the day that any kind of sexual activity is happening, just to see what her feelings are on that day. I know for me, some days I love for someone to touch / play with my chest, other days it makes me feel really dysphoric, so I always appreciate someone doing a quick check-in before getting down to it.
-This should be standard for all sex regardless of gender / genitals, but make sure you ask for verbal consent before touching or going down on her!
-Finally Fucking Trans Women is a zine with lots of great thoughts / ideas / advice on sex with trans women, I'd check it out if you are looking for ideas https://www.amazon.com/Fucking-Trans-Women-FTW-1/dp/1492128937

Lets see...

I had a happy valentines day.

Last night I got the screen on my iPhone fixed, and it only cost $30.

I also picked up my first Squirrel Girl book while I was waiting for the repair, and I loved it. Truly one of Marvel's best characters.

I was down half a pound this morning. Just 3 more until I reach my first milestone of 25lbs lost.

19 days until my second child is born.

HCF is great. If you want to read the book that inspired large chunks of it, Soul of a New Machine is really good.

There's nothing wrong with being a weeb, just be respectful to native Japanese and don't be like a trans chaser is to us.

I don't have manga suggestions, but if you like to read Japanese books then: Musashi, Taiko, The Soil.

Not doing summaries/reviews, cause it's late and I'm tired. On request, I suppose. Mostly books, with a couple docs and a few blogs.


Less theory, more personal experiences:

• Stone Butch Blues (fiction)
  
• S/He
  
• 3 to Infinity: Beyond Two Genders
  
• Gender Failure
  
• Neutrois Nonsense
  
• Asexy Sex
  
• (a)sexual
  
  Actually Theory:
  
  
• Not Your Mom's Trans 101
  
• My (new) Gender Workbook
  
• You and Your Gender Identity (The author also has some videos)
  
• Any of the videos or articles Zinnia Jones does
  
• As Nature Made Him
  
• Whipping Girl
  
• Queer Theory: An Introduction
  
• Gender Outlaw
  
• Gender Outlaws (same author, different books)
  
• Transgender Warriors
  
• Sexing the Body
  
  And a couple links I make it a point to share whenever I can:
  
  
• Trans 101 (for trans people
  
• there are some things I need to tell you

I’ve been using this IPL device from amazon. After 4 weeks hair has definitely slowed, but I’m very skeptical if it’s going to give me the ultimate result I’m looking for.

Hello, I am for all intents and purposes bipolar. Never diagnosed officially, but thats what my therapist suggested at one point, BPD2.

I highly recommend you buy the book, "The Body Keeps the Score." I think it will help you figure out a lot of the "why" in your life. It's a heavy read but I really enjoyed it and learned about my past. While it's focused on how trauma effects us (and a lot of things can be traumatic that we don't realize), it might still help you reflect upon yourself even if thats not the case.

As far as talking about it, just be careful. It depends on how affirming your therapist is. Some places that provide HRT will ask for your medical history, and considering that, some patients get denied HRT after being labeled as bipolar until they throw them through all the psychological hoops. Even in progressive Oregon where HRT is given on an 'informed consent' basis, the first form they gave me asked if I had any mental illnesses, including BPD. I was not about to mention anything for fear of denial.

IMO, I would see a therapist to discuss the BPD, and a completely separate one to talk about your gender. Once you start associating the two I think problems arise.

Even better would be if you lived anywhere that has a super affirming, all inclusive program, such as Gender Pathways within the Pacific Northwest Kaiser coverage. Their therapist wouldn't associate the two issues unless you were behaving completely abnormal.

Mood issues suck. I feel your pain, but you will make it through. Hit me up if you ever need to vent, I get it.


edit: None of this to say that you are or are not transgender, but if you did ever want hormones you should consider this.