(Part 2) Top products from r/predaddit

Most governments (for sure in Ontario) have programs to provide information and get you as prepared as you're going to be.

I just sent a detailed email to a friend of mine that is expecting as well and was in the same boat as you. Some of the stuff you probably haven't thought about yet, so take what I say below at face value.

Also, to all in the thread, the obvious disclaimer - these are my opinions. You might not agree with them. Also, my email was based on living in Toronto, but you can change to meet your situation


a) To start, there are a multitude of books available, as well as websites. Not to mention that I'm sure you'll be hearing stuff from friends and family. I've found it best to just filter all of that. I read only one book while my wife was pregnant, and that's because it was a good read - http://www.amazon.com/Baby-Meets-World-Smile-Toddle/dp/0312591349 (it's available at Toronto Library, so no need to buy it).

This book is also a pretty good guide - http://www.amazon.com/Be-Prepared-Gary-Greenberg/dp/0743251547 (again, also at TPL)

Here's what I found with books - Most of them have the same tone when it comes to men - "Dude, no more going out to party, and since you're stupid as hell, here are the basics"

So don't spend too much time reading 1,000,000 different books - it will be repetitive.


b) My wife and I took the prenatal courses at St. Joseph's Hospital. They helped because I learned a lot, and they were great information. Definitely helped put my mind at ease because I really knew nothing about raising a child.


c) Stroller / Car Seat. This is a toughie. Scenarios as follows:

i) Buy a travel system. This is for convenience. It's an infant seat & stroller in one package. You take the infant seat out (with the baby in it) and it locks directly into the stroller. Easy transport, no fuss. Downside - infant seats are only good until they're 6 months old. Then you have to buy another car seat.

ii) Buy the stroller and infant seat separately. Doesn't really make sense to do this, but it's an option.

iii) Buy the stroller and a convertible car seat separately (this is what we did). A convertible car seat covers from 5lb to 70lb, so basically the entire time the child needs a car seat. The downfall with this compared to a travel system is that you have to take your child out of the car seat to bring into the house / put into the stroller / etc. If (s)he's sleeping, there's a chance they'll wake up.

We also bought baby carriers (Ergo Baby, Mobi Wrap) because we live right downtown, so walking around with a baby / taking the TTC with a baby is easier when they're strapped to you.


d) Clothes. Don't spend too much on clothes. There are outfits that cost far too much, and they grow so quick that the item of clothes is only used for 3 - 4 weeks. Plus it's the typical baby shower gift, so expect to get a bunch of clothes.


e) Feeding - know that it will be hard, whatever avenue your wife goes down. Just know that whatever she chooses, you need to support her and remind her to stick through it because whether it's formula or breast, it's hard. (if you don't know, they have milk / formula exclusively until 6 months)

My wife is a big fan of the Boppy pillow. Just one of many items out there. We also got a Pashmama, which is a cover for when my wife wants to feed in public.


f) Sleeping - I made the mistake of buying a crib right away, and I set it up and everything, only to have my wife decide that she wanted a bassinet, and also that she wanted our daughter to co-sleep. You will need a crib, just discuss with your wife what set up you want before you run out and buy one.


g) To elaborate on point F, the same applies for all other baby items. We have a bouncer, a crib, a bassinet, a play pad, and some toys. My appt is suddenly feeling very very small. While my daughter uses most of the items (still doesn't use the crib), I probably didn't have to buy everything at once.


h) Diapers. In our experience, Pampers Swaddlers have been the best. You will have leaks / blowouts / messes, and from there you'll determine what works best for your baby. A good price on diapers is $0.14 - 0.18 / diaper. Amazon.ca now has Amazon Family - http://www.amazon.ca/gp/family/signup/
It's a great service once you find out which diapers work best for you.


The rest of the stuff you'll learn along the way.
You need a diaper bag. Spit rags are essential. If the child's fingers are too small to cut his / her nails, you can file them down. Burp the baby after they eat (note: do this even if they fall asleep). Introduce pacifiers later on in life if breast feeding to avoid "nipple confusion". Etc. Etc.


There are so many things that you can't possibly learn from a book, and every baby is different, so the rest of the stuff you'll learn as you go along.



In the end - congrats and have fun!

This book has helped me quite a lot, I also have his other book for the first year. I managed to get them both for $5 at Value Village. He has one more for toddler years as well. Lots of solid information plus it talks not just about her or the baby but also about you and your relationship.

http://www.amazon.com/The-Expectant-Father-Dads-Be/dp/0789205386

Enroll in a pre-natal class and go with her. My wife and I found one that was free and run by our community centre. I have learned so much and it has been so important to learn that EVERY pregnancy is different.

Understand that the best thing to do is hope and expect a happy healthy baby, anything beyond that is all a bonus. While you are supporting her, try to find time for yourself. Becoming a dad is stressful and exciting and you'll want to blow off steam.

Finally and most importantly, realise that no one really knows what they are doing and are fully prepared with their first child. This is a learning and growing experience. Have fun with it.

Take some of the courses at your hospital once you get to the 3rd trimester. Go with the a la carte method for ones that interest you rather than doing them all. Seriously, between lurking here and related subs, books people give you, family members, complete strangers, alpha parent friends, etc you'll feel like you have information overload. Most of the how to stuff like feeding, changing, and washing are easy with practice. The less obvious stuff has to do with safety - whoever helps you with your car seat install and nurses are both great resources on these issues.

I've been reading [Baby Meets World] (http://www.amazon.com/Baby-Meets-World-Smile-Toddle/dp/0312591349) which is an examination of current and historical child rearing trends in the context of infant development. This helped me gain some perspective on all the info I got. This is not a how to book, more of a what happens and why kind of read

My experience and many others here during the expecting time is a confusing cocktail of emotions ranging from pride, love, fear, anxiety, frustration and bliss. Talk with your partner about all of it - she probably feels the same way. This sub is great for asking questions and venting too.

Congrats and good luck!

Yay midwives! I loved my midwife care, here's hoping you have a similarly awesome experience! Here's a few things I found helpful. I won't promise it's everything I needed, but it should be a start:

For mom:

• Nursing pads, even if she's not planning to breastfeed, because leaking. I like Lansinoh Stay-Dry. They make an ultra-soft version but I don't find them softer, just less practical.
  
  
• Nursing sleep bras. I found nursing tanks kind of useless, but can't live without sleep bras.
  
  
• As someone else said, pads, more than you think you need. Ugly/old underwear to go with them.
  
  
• Preparation H wipes with witch hazel, and Earth Mama Angel Baby Bottom Balm. Useful for both vaginal and c-section births. Keep them by the toilet. Expect to leave some dignity in the bathroom with those first couple poops.
  
  
• Colace and prunes. See above.
  
  
• Regular strength Tylenol - not extra-strength in case she's also on Percocet
  
  
• Big ass water mug. Take the one the hospital gives you. (Take everything in your hospital room unless they say you can't take it. Ask for extras of stuff you know you need, like their giant pads and weird mesh underwear.)
  
  
• If planning to breastfeed, Medela brand lanolin. I find it much softer than the Lansinoh brand.
  
  
  For the house:
  
  
• White noise machine. This baby saved our sleep. Some people swear by the shusher, but I find the noise it makes super annoying and it only goes for half an hour max. Hahahhaha nooo.
  
  
• Tons of receiving blankets and a big bin to store them. I thought we had too many. We don't, they get spit up on a lot and we change them out frequently.
  
  
• Hands-free baby carrier. Sometimes babies need to be held beyond what your arms/sanity can handle. The k'tan is pretty cheap and has saved our sanity many times.
  
  
• Lots of food you can prepare and eat one handed. Frozen burritos, apples, grape tomatoes, granola bars, cracker & cheese trays, whatever you like. You're going to be hungry and tired and holding a kid all the time.
  
  
• Extra throw pillows. I like long rectangular ones to nurse with. They're also good for middle of the night baby-wants-to-play time. When kid does that we literally just put her on the playmat on the floor and lay down next to her until she gets fussy, then she goes back to bed.
  
  
• Crinkle books and toys that rattle.

Just go now:

Sleeper - Agree with OP, this thing is fantastic. Daughter never slept in her "real" crib until nearly 9 months old. Really pissed that they added the auto-rocker and now I'm tempted to spend $90 to replace our perfectly good one.

Swing - Get one that plugs-in. Also, the one that rocks like a ship (4mom?) and is like $300 - wife's cousin bought one because expensive = best and kid was getting sea sick.

Nosefrida or Baby Comfy Nose - this may save your sanity and the life of you, your spouse, or your child because otherwise sleepless nights are in your future.

Boppy - amazingly useful.

Extra car seat base

Don't bother:

• Baby wipe warmer
  
• Bumbo
  
• Diaper Genie - they barely work and you get a compressed plastic log of unholy smell instead of a plastic bag that you can get rid of after one diaper if warranted.
  
  Kid Dependent:
  
  Bottles - we got lucky on our first try and she did great with the Tommy bottles. Don't buy a ton or at least don't open them all and be unable to exchange.
  
  Formula - not judging and sometimes its necessary or just a simple convenience. But some kids prefer one brand over another and/or will react differently to different brands. Also, Costco = Gerber; Target = Similac and WalMart/Sam's = Enfamil.
  
  Pacifier - some love them, some hate them. Most love, but ours hated the straight kind and was insisting on the flat ones within a few months.
  
  Humidifier - get a real one that uses heat and be smart enough to put it far enough away from the kid so they don't get burned. Ultrasonic doesn't do shit for stuffy noses or coughs.
  
  Good Idea, but can wait:
  
  Video monitor - We went with a normal Foscam and put the tinyCam app on our phones for a few bucks.
  
  Small food processor - as said elsewhere, don't get the baby one; or just get the cheaper Bella one from Kohl's. Making baby food isn't that hard and it's a ton cheaper. If you've got a Nutribullet or similar, you're also good to go.

Looks great.... I have 16 mo old twins. The beginning is really rough, but there's some amazing payoff as they get older.

A few suggestions:

• We had our girls crib together for the first 3 months or so. We kept one crib in our room and one in the nursery. During the day they would sleep in the nursery; at night they would sleep in our room so we could get to them faster and easier in the middle of the night.
  
  

• Glad to see you have Boudreaux -- when you need that stuff, you REALLY need it.
  
• You may want to get rid of that baby powder. They do not recommend using it anymore because all the dust it throws in the air can be bad for the babies' lungs.
  
• You may want to replace the basket next to the glider with a table so mom can have a drink or some food. Also good place to put the pump (if she decides to pump).
  
• My wife chose to feed in the living room, so we quickly moved the glider there. It gets lonely pretty quickly to sit there and feed all day without people or TV to keep you company.
  
  
  Also, you may want to get one of these nursing pillows: http://www.amazon.com/My-Brest-Friend-Deluxe-Nursing/dp/B0032Z81M4/ref=sr_1_4?s=baby-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1426256362&sr=1-4
  
  Good luck!!!

My wife is also just over 8 weeks along (Due March 8th, 9th, or 10th, depending who you ask). We were trying, but it was still a bit unexpected when I found out (in both a good and panic kinda way). The worst part now is that the wife has a cold and can't take much to help her feel better. Normally she would be okay, but would be taking cough and congestion medicine.

As for worrying - I do it a lot. I spent many a night tossing and turning and worrying about stuff. I talk to my wife about it, which certainly helps, but mostly I'm a wreck. I have found out that physical activity helps a lot (running, biking, etc).

We've been to the doctor once, and everything was normal, but I won't be happy until this little person is born. That being said, I've been very happy with the book: She's Having a Baby, I'm having a breakdown to be very useful, informative, and like many other books, doesn't get me worked up over things.

Lastly, congrats!

One thing I know that I wish I had at the beginning is a Boba Baby wrap. That thing is amazing! My daughter loved to be held, but its hard to get stuff done with no free arms. This thing worked great and would she slept great in it.

Yeah, note to that though, I think its law they have to "know" they are being recorded if its a babysitter. If you open a port on your router you can check it from anywhere.

LiveCams Pro (iOS) is the best most compatible app I used, but I know there is also specific baby monitor ones you can set to set off notifications at certain noise threshholds. The standard def ones come in on sale at around 65 bucks on sale, normally 75. I have both these models (use one to check on dogs), the standard is more than adequate to be honest, but I know some people just want to have HD everything.

SD:

http://www.amazon.com/Foscam-FI8910W-Network-Camera-Two-Way/dp/B006ZP8UOW/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1394029900&sr=8-2&keywords=foscam

The HD ones are nice, but a couple more bucks at around 100:

http://www.amazon.com/Foscam-FI9821W-Indoor-Wireless-Camera/dp/B00AJWK5WW/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1394029939&sr=8-2&keywords=foscam+hd

My wife had success with preggo pops or these ginger candies. Basically I tried everything and anything to help including a wrist band for motion sickness but those worked the best, at least she is eating which is good.

A fun lighthearted parenting book for men, Be Prepared.

And another, Show Dad How.


Oh and, congratulations :)

I was planning on getting her a card and a gift from the baby, we are due in June, so maybe something about how he can't wait to meet her.

I don't usually get my wife jewelry, but I got her this a few months ago: http://www.amazon.com/Sterling-Silver-Mother-Pendant-Necklace/dp/B001ULD9YC/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1397491668&sr=8-2

Figured Mother's day would be a good time to give it to her.

Hope that helps!

I loved having the audiobook version of this. Narration was great and you still get a PDF w/ the Audible version that has various lists (what to pack in your hospital bag, for example) that you can print out.

My baby girl is due anytime this month, and I wish that his follow-up books had audio versions too.

Here are some links for the product in the above comment for different countries:

Amazon Smile Link: http://smile.amazon.com/Sterling-Silver-Mother-Pendant-Necklace/dp/B001ULD9YC/ref=sr_1_2


|Country|Link|Charity Links|
|:-----------|:------------|:------------|
|USA|smile.amazon.com|EFF|




To help add charity links, please have a look at this thread.

This bot is currently in testing so let me know what you think by voting (or commenting). The thread for feature requests can be found here.

I highly recommend this book for good advice on what to expect during and after pregnancy , and This book for practical advice with good illustrations.

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Edit: a space

Here's what I remember really using during our stay:

For you: basic toiletries, a change of clothes, a phone/device charger, a book or Nintendo Switch or whatever it is to keep your brain occupied. (Although I honestly could NOT focus on my book at all, I think I read a total of two pages over four days. I actually ended up playing Sudoku on my phone and watching HGTV.)

For her: Nursing tops, nursing bra, post-maternity pads and underwear, a maternity gown, all of her toiletries.

For the baby: A going home outfit, a swaddle blanket. Also, the car seat was installed, checked, and double-checked weeks before.

Call your hospital/birthing center and find out what they provide. Mine provided diapers, blankets, and onesies for my daughter, and some toiletries and personal supplies for my wife. They also had a kitchenette stocked with snacks and drinks. If you're lucky they'll have your back and be able to take some pressure off of you.

Expecting Better by Emily Oster is easily the most useful book I read. She's a University of Chicago Economist and delves into the actual research.

My wife took Diclegis and it seemed to help, at least at first. She ended up only needing it once or twice, but her OB suggested taking it up to 4 times if needed. I'd recommend your wife talk to her OB about that and other alternatives. Mine also took Tums daily, and regularly drank ginger ale (make sure it has real ginger) and used preggy pop drops.

There isn’t a manual, but this is the next best thing.

Also, like the other redditor said: stop whatever you’re doing right now and breathe.

Edit: missed a word

My wife and I where exactly the same...but we didn't hold out for more than a few hours and we ended up telling our respective parents, even though we where cautious because of them (my mom had a miscarriage in the first trimester before I came along and my mom in law went to full term, only to loose her baby a few days after birth due to preeclampsia) and we waited till week 8 until we told our closest friends and after that the news just leaked, by the time our week 12 announcement came along a lot of people that "didn't know" already knew.

Maybe this book, that was recommended in this subreddit, will help you pass the time and start to prepare :)

Wife bought this one and I've been impressed with it especially considering the price. No app or smartphone tie in but if you are using just for the home it works fine. Even has night vision mode for a dark room and allows 3 cameras on the same monitor.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01CZUD4R8/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o02_s01?ie=UTF8&th=1

Get a sound machine. Our son has never slept better! And it muffles the noise in the house so you aren't tip toeing around trying not to wake the baby.

We got this one on amazon for a good price.

Did a quick search in this sub to find:

This - which is hilarious

[Tim Russert's books](http://www.amazon.com/dp/1401359655 and [2] http://www.amazon.com/Wisdom-Our-Fathers-Lessons-Daughters/dp/1400064805)

The Birth Partner

my boys can swim.

Pregnancy for Men.

The expectant Father:

Hapiest baby on the block

Practical Guide

From Dude To Dad: http://www.amazon.com/From-Dude-Dad-Diaper-Pregnancy/dp/0399166262

The Expectant Father: http://www.amazon.com/Expectant-Father-Advice-Dads---Be/dp/0789210770/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1408486049&sr=1-1&keywords=the+expectant+father

And of course the What To Expect Books.

Oh also please don't buy your books off of Amazon, those links were merely for reference.

Hah, these are quite different to our baby girls first books that we got at our baby shower!

My Dad Thinks he's funny

Quantum Physics for Baby

and Avocado Baby

I'm looking forward to reading our girl "My dad thinks he's funny", because my god I do all those things already.

I highly recommend reading Expecting Better, as the author looks at the actual scientific evidence behind most common pregnancy do's and don'ts.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D8XG0MC?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share. Baby be mine 3 in 1. 😀👍🏻

We went low tech at the beginning; with just an audio one, but we found it to be a bit unreliable and we couldn’t tell if baby was just crying in his sleep or actually crying for something else, with his eyes open.
We ended up buying this one: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01CZUD4R8/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_plELAbYBP722Z and love that it also tells us the (approximate) temperature in the room. It’s pretty cheap for a video monitor and doesn’t require keeping your phone’s (Vimeo / Amcrest / other) app open to keep an eye on him/her.

Amazon
Right here actually
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00606O9NC/ref=redir_mdp_mobile/178-7696491-8916447

Here is the mobile version of your link

Here is the desktop version of your link

I was suggested and have purchased Caring for Your Baby and Young Child, 6th Edition: Birth to Age 5