Top products from r/survivorsofabuse

We found 47 product mentions on r/survivorsofabuse. We ranked the 19 resulting products by number of redditors who mentioned them. Here are the top 20.

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Top comments that mention products on r/survivorsofabuse:

u/tigalicious · 1 pointr/survivorsofabuse

Personally, I'm very indebted to self-help books. It may sound silly, but that was seriously more helpful than any therapist has been for me. They give me a way to process new information without having to feel vulnerable in front of someone right that minute, you know? The most useful to me, that relate to your post at least, was The Verbally Abusive Relationship. It helped me to wrap my head around what happened, and helped me feel strong enough to give new relationships a shot. For me at least, that book helped to draw me out of the fear and other symptoms that I was living with.

I think, in the end, the struggle we go through will eventually make us stronger people; more empathetic, more able to see the difference between subtle bad signs and good ones, and more equipped to support other survivors. It just takes a lot to turn us into those people... But the future is there. Eventually, this will all be just a story that you'll tell about the life experiences that gave you your wisdom and strength.

u/tigereyetea · 2 pointsr/survivorsofabuse

Oh my Goodness what you went through is straight up torture I am SO sorry wow. I have a couple ideas, I get free treatment through the county I live in, so mabye theres a county program you can go through? i had to jump through some hoops but it was worth it and i was placed in a TREM group, which is a trauma recovery group. if thats not an option you might want to look into groups that meet and talk about their abuse mabye on I just looked it up and there are a lot of trauma and abuse groups. Hopefully theres one near you. And third if both these options wont work it might help to do a workbook on trauma such as


A combination of all three methods would probably be ideal!

I am so sorry for all you've been through truly is horrific. I applaud you for moving forward and focusing on the solution ecspecially at such a young age. It really says a lot about you. Once you get health insurance look into EMDDR I've had lots of friends and my sister have great results with it. HUGS.

u/belljar23 · 3 pointsr/survivorsofabuse

It is really scary. Try to take deep breaths before a date to control the anxiety. Yes, you have to just take it VERY slowly. You need to establish some trust with the person before considering anything physical. With that trust in place, you can confide that you need to take it slow. You don't have to be explicit, you can just say "I have a complicated past, and I really need to take it slow as far as intimacy, even with just kissing. Is this okay with you?"
If they're in a rush, they're probably not a good fit for you. I know it's really frustrating.
Reading this book also helped me.

Best of luck!

u/not-moses · 3 pointsr/survivorsofabuse

Well. While we do not diagnose here, I will suggest looking into C-PTSD because that is a) pretty likely what's under all your other symptoms at the level of physiology, and b) what we would treat for to deal with all the symptomatic upshots of it. Suggested:

  1. At least look into the following books to get a fix on the etiology:

    Nina Brown's Children of the Self-Absorbed: A Grown-Up's Guide to Getting Over Narcissistic Parents

    Eleanor Payson's The Wizard of Oz and other Narcissists: Coping with the One-Way Relationship in Work, Love, and Family

    Lindsay Gibson's Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents

    Elan Golomb's Trapped in the Mirror: Adult Children of Narcissists in the Struggle for Self

    Susan Forward's Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life (a bit long in tooth now, but still useful) and Emotional Blackmail: When the People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation, and Guilt to Manipulate You

    Kimberlee Roth & Frieda Friedman's Surviving a Borderline Parent: How to Heal Your Childhood Wounds & Build Trust, Boundaries, and Self-Esteem

    (I was raised by crazymakers, and got a lot of clarity about how I imitated my abusers and/or compensated with all manner of defense mechanisms for the effects of having been in-struct-ed, programmed, conditioned, socialized and/or normalized to the state of learned helplessness in which I lived when my defenses failed me.)

  2. Support Groups: AA, MA and/or NA if one is using intoxicants to try to cope with emotional pain; ACA, EA and CoDA... where you will find others in similar boats who have found explanations, answers and solutions.

  3. Books and academic, professional websites including Mayo Clinic, WebMD, NIMH (National Institute of Mental Health), NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness), and even Wikipedia (when everything asserted is solidly documented with citations). Accurate information is power.

  4. Psychotherapy: I currently use Ogden's SP4T as the interoceptive 9th of the 10 StEPs of Emotion Processing, but had good results over the years with several of the CBTs including REBT, collegiate critical thinking, CPT, and schema therapy, as well as EMDR, DBT, MBCT, ACT, MBBT, MBSR, HBCT, SEPt, and NARM.

    To find the clinicians who know how to use these psychotherapies, look here, and here, and here, and (for DBT specialists in particular) here. If you dig a little on each page, you will be able to see which therapies they use. Most MD / psychiatrists, btw, are not therapists themselves (they are medication specialists), but can refer you to those who are, and are often -- though not always -- excellent sources of referral.

  5. Mindfulness Meditation: Try the Vipassana-style? (For a lot of people with anxiety, this stuff handles anxiety chop chop. Not sure about depression. Many of the modern psychotherapies for anxiety are actually based on it now.)

  6. Therapy Workbooks: I got a lot of lift-off by using inexpensive workbooks like these, and these, and these, and these.

  7. Moderate exercise: Because it is the single healthiest of the distractions one can use to yank oneself out of the paradigm for a while... and it can help to "massage" the brain so that it responds more quickly to psychotherapy.

  8. Medications, but only if really needed to get one stabilized enough to do the previous seven things on this list: Find a board certified psychopharmacologist in your area by using the clinician locator on the Psychology Today website. Getting psych meds from a GP or primary care doc can be useless or even risky. Psych diagnoses, meds and med interactions are just too complex now for most GPs and primary care docs.
u/GrumpyOlBumkin · 1 pointr/survivorsofabuse

No you are NOT a whiner. And that's the thing. That pain, that drives us nuts, that drove our parents nuts, and their parents--it does not stop. Not until we face it and release it. <3

Have you read the book "Invincible", by Brian Martin? I think it'll shed a lot of light on what is going on. At least it did for me.
Also try the book Emotional Sobriety by Tian Dayton, and The Shack by William P. Young.

The last one, especially helped me with forgiveness. I hope these books give you what they have given me. A path to peace. And there are more, if you want. I read self help books like they were the life-raft and I was the shipwrecked.

u/TheRainMonster · 3 pointsr/survivorsofabuse

God I'm sorry. You didn't deserve the awful shit that happened to you.

I recently read The Gift of Fear. It should be at your local library. It's a fantastic book for breaking down exactly what the signs of violence are so that you can escape a situation early or avoid it altogether. I can't recommend it enough. I've found it much easier to relax around people when I have that information clearly defined in my consciousness.

u/and_hank_mardukas · 4 pointsr/survivorsofabuse

I would be more than happy to discuss Kerry Keyes' story in my book She Can Fly

u/beverly-kills · 2 pointsr/survivorsofabuse

I feel the EXACT same way right now. You're not alone.

Someone recommended me this book called Healing Sex but I haven't read it yet... maybe it's helpful for you too.

Following this thread.

u/unmarked_graves · 1 pointr/survivorsofabuse

i can relate and i’m working through the same things. unfortunately i don’t have advice because i’m still in this mess but someone recommended me this book that i have been reading parts of and i’ve found it comprehensive and insightful.

u/Arxl · 3 pointsr/survivorsofabuse

This has been my cuddle buddy. It is big enough that if you hold it from the front the forepaws can wrap around your neck/shoulders and is really comforting. Sorta big enough to be big spoon in bed too.

u/Gabbitty · 4 pointsr/survivorsofabuse

I'm going to recommend something that will seem out of left field that I've recommended before to someone here who was in a situation similar to yours. A lot of sexual abuse survivors wind up with borderline personality disorder due to their experiences. There's an excellent book for people in relationships with borderline personality disorder sufferers. Part of it deals specifically with the issues you are likely dealing with. It's full of practical advice and tips. This isn't to say that your partner has borderline personality disorder, of course. Take what's useful and relevant for you, and disregard the rest. The book is called Stop Walking on Eggshells by Mason & Kreger.