Reddit reviews My Body, My Self for Boys: Revised Edition (What's Happening to My Body?)

I think getting him a book on puberty is a really good idea. You can't just shut this away and expect him not to be curious. I found porn at a pretty young age -- I think I was 9 or so. As far as I can tell, I've turned out to be a healthy individual when it comes to sex. My mom did talk to me about it, basically she said that she understood why I was curious but that I was too young to be visiting those kinds of sites, that they were for adults and not realistic, etc. She also got me a couple different books on puberty and I remember spending a good amount of time on sites for adolescents that explained things like puberty.

It's unfortunate that you're the one who's going to end up dealing with this, but someone needs to talk to him and it doesn't sound like your mother will. 7 is really young to be processing the nuances of porn and sexuality. Ideally, you'll continue to have conversations with him as he grows older and you can broach more complicated or serious topics like healthy sexual relationships and STDs.

For now, here are some resources:

Scarleteen -- Really good sex education website for adolescents

What's Happening To My Body? -- I had a girl's version of this book when I was younger, and it's really good, very detailed. There's also a companion book, My Body My Self, that's designed to be more interactive, kids are supposed to journal or answer questions or write about themselves in it, but it's also got a ton of information.

Good luck!

I think you did fine, but leaving the onus on him to come to you with questions might not work out. I suspect that a lot of kids aren't very comfortable or very willing to come to their parents with embarrassing questions right out of the blue. And lecturing doesn't do much good. The best approach, in my opinion, is to have short, ongoing, regular conversations about sexual and reproductive health, especially as his development continues and the conversations need to get more specific about some of the details. The more you talk about it, the less awkward it gets, and he'll be more likely to ask questions when it just becomes part of a normal conversation. Also, there are tons of great books about sexual and reproductive health and puberty out there. Get him three or four books and let him read. Get him the girls versions, too, so they're not a complete mystery. I'll include some recommendations below.

Here are some of the things I've added to the conversations I've had with my kid, specifically about porn:

-Pornography only shows actors performing sexual acts for the camera. Typical intimate, physical, sexual relationships between two people don't look very much like porn, so don't be fooled into thinking that's what a sexual relationship really looks like.

-Whether or not watching pornography is ethical or moral is something I think people need to decide for themselves. A lot of people think it's unethical for the following reasons: a) it doesn't show realistic relationships and distorts people's sense of what sex should look like; b) the actors, especially the female actors, are often exploited because they were in a vulnerable position and were taken advantage of; c) there are problems with things like human trafficking; d) some of the actors are underage; e) it can cause problems with addiction and desensitization; f) how would you feel if it was your daughter or sister performing? Do you think you should treat other people's daughters or sisters any differently?

But other people would say there's not a problem with looking at porn, especially if you're careful about the above problems. And a lot of people watch porn, so it's not weird or unusual. But deciding if it's right or not will have to be up to you.

If you do decide to watch porn, I would say -- as with anything else -- do it in moderation, and make sure it's not affecting your ability to have healthy relationships in real life.

Good books on puberty and reproductive and sexual health:

American Medical Association Girl's Guide to Becoming a Teen
by American Medical Association et al.

American Medical Association Boy's Guide to Becoming a Teen
by American Medical Association et al.

What's Happening to My Body? Book for Boys: Revised Edition
by Lynda Madaras et al.

My Body, My Self for Boys: Revised Edition by Lynda Madaras et al.

The Care and Keeping of You 2: The Body Book for Older Girls
by Cara Natterson et al.

What's Happening to My Body? Book for Girls: Revised Edition
by Lynda Madaras et al.

I went through this with my kids and these were fantastic!

For Boys

For Girls

Was it My Body, My Self?