Reddit reviews The Worry Trick: How Your Brain Tricks You into Expecting the Worst and What You Can Do About It
We found 2 Reddit comments about The Worry Trick: How Your Brain Tricks You into Expecting the Worst and What You Can Do About It. Here are the top ones, ranked by their Reddit score.
I could have written this exact paragraph a month ago. I was so angry at myself for being so inward-looking, trapped in worry. I know it hurts, and it's scary to feel out of control with worry.
I am doing much better now, and I know you can too. Everyone is different, but I'll tell you what I think helped me when I was in this place:
I read this book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0197SJP0G/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1
The basic idea presented is to embrace the worry rather than fighting with it, or pushing it away, because that only makes it worse. The book presents some specific ways of doing this, but I sort of just developed my own method:
Whenever I have a "what if" thought, or a "let's pretend something bad" thought, I get out a little notebook I carry with me and write down the thought. Then I elaborate even more on the thought, writing those details down too. For example, if I worried that I might bomb an upcoming job interview, I would imagine all the details surrounding this, like how the interviewer's face would look, how awful I would feel during and afterward, what the interviewer might say afterward, etc. The difference here is that I'm leaning even farther *into* the scary thought, rather than doing what I normally do, which is to either try to come up with a solution ("Maybe I can study more for the interview... But I don't have time before then...") or means of avoidance ("Maybe I should have never taken this interview... This is all happening to me because I made mistakes X, Y, Z months ago...") or eventually worry about the worry ("I can't believe I'm worrying about this again..."). Instead of letting the worry take me down all these other paths, I focus on the initial scary thought itself and embellish it as much as I can. This has been really effective for me. I've almost filled a whole notebook though, so I'll have to buy another soon, heh.
Again, I swear to you I felt every word that you wrote above, so if it helps at all to know this: you're not alone.
There is a lot going on here. But hang in there, I have a feeling that it will all turn out ok!
First of all, without being able to diagnose your mom, she seems like having huge anxiety issues. You seem ready to go NC with her (no communications). That might help. If there are a lot more going on with your mom, you might want to check r/raisedbynarcissists. They have tips to handle parents that are controlling and toxic.
Next, your anger. I just posted a reply to someone else, that you might want to check out:
https://www.reddit.com/r/Anger/comments/am05at/satisfaction/efid6ei?utm_source=reddit-android
There is also a sticky on anger in this sub:
https://www.reddit.com/r/Anger/comments/8fjgtz/some_practical_advice_for_dealing_with_an_anger/?utm_source=reddit-android
Lastly, you mention anxiety. Do you know what kind of anxiety you have? Have you been diagnosed formally?
Moving places, living in your car, and of course your mom's behavior can take a huge toll on your mental health. If you like to read, you can learn a lot about this condition and how to get better. Meditation, exercise, healthy living, etc. Some of these books are really amazing and can help a lot.
The Worry Trick: How Your Brain Tricks You into Expecting the Worst and What You Can Do About It https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0197SJP0G/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_V.bvCbV7ZY5H9
Short and results-based based
Dare: The New Way to End Anxiety and Stop Panic Attacks Fast https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0158S7E1G/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_EacvCb8797JJ2
Centered around a method to stop panic attacks and reduce anxiety
The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook
https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/1626252157/ref=dbs_a_w_dp_1626252157
Very complete. Covers all the aspects, explains what happened in the body, and detailed ways to get better (meditation, medications, etc.)
I like the last one a lot. It's really a all-in-one approach. 18 bucks is like a a fifth of the price of a therapist appointment... Well worth the money overall lifetime.
There are also subs on those that can help.
Good luck!