More importantly than that, though, is the clear evidence that people with untreated ADHD are costing society a lot in terms of drug use, accidents, divorce, suicide, etc. etc. Below is a repost of a similar discussion that I had just recently:

I'm on mobile and not at work, so don't have the original source info immediately available, but a great synopsis is here:
http://www.smartkidswithld.org/ld-basics/treatments-and-support/untreated-adhd-lifelong-risks

A longer explanation and more detail is in the beautifully written "ADHD In Adults" by Russell Barkley (probably the leading ADHD expert in America, if not the world), who drew from a 16 year longitudinal study and a host of other studies and statistical information. (http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/1609180755)

Edit: Spelling/punc.

If anyone wants a good book recommendation on this subject, just finished this: http://www.amazon.com/Questions-Answers-Attention-Hyperactivity-Disorder/dp/0763784524

It was especially nice due to the Q&A format and very brief but still sufficiently explained answers. I could easily skip questions that I didn't really care about. If you're a woman looking for an explanation of how your diagnosis got missed, I recommend it. It's better for validation than coping strategies, but as a "gifted girl that lost it in college and kept getting diagnosed with depression," it was refreshing.

I don't have time at the moment to write a longer comment, but I HIGHLY recommend reading Women With Attention Deficit Disoder by Sari Solden. I'm about halfway through it myself and it's amazing, validating, and more helpful than I could've ever imagined. It's also arranged in a very ADHD friendly way. The sections are clearly explained, well organized, and broken into manageable chunks, and the paper is very highlighter-friendly (I've come across so many books lately that aren't that yes, the highlighter-friendly paper matters!). There's also audio and e-book versions if you prefer.

And if you like that book, this year she released a companion workbook (I also have that, diving into it after I finish the first one!).

Edit: fixed a word

This might help: https://www.amazon.com/Thriving-Adult-ADHD-Strengthen-Functioning-ebook/dp/B07KZJ9WS4

It's a book by an ADHD specialist that consists of only specific strategies, exercises, and techniques to tackle what you're describing. I feel like you're seeking a meatier, more tangible answer to the question of "how" than what OP is describing, and this is a great resource for it.

That said, don't discount OP's advice because you feel it's incompatible with you, because it isn't. I can sympathize with the feeling that some obstacles or impediments are bigger or more permanent than people on the outside realize. But at the end of the day, if you believe that ADD will always keep you down without resistance, you turn that into the reality. Believing that it's possible to manage and work around it is a prerequisite to that becoming your reality. Hopefully this book can give credibility to that more empowered sentiment and help you believe it. Best of luck!

> Or is this just a one-man crusade against a perceived flaw in American diagnostic methods?

It's a one-woman crusade to get published:
http://www.amazon.com/Disease-Called-Childhood-American-Epidemic-ebook/dp/B00L9AXZY8

She's cashing in on Big Pharma paranoia and anti-psychiatry sentiments with a "controversial" book. That's my cynical conclusion. :)

>Does the pre-menstrual phase reduce the effectiveness of medication?

Yes

From this book

Links to amazon: 100 Questions & Answers About Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) In Women And Girls by Dr. Patricia Quinn

 


>Question 72

>Do hormonal fluctuations affect ADHD symptoms in girls and women?

 

>Answer 72

>It has been proposed that whenever brain estrogen levels
fall below the “minimum brain estrogen requirement,”
for whatever reason and at whatever age, brain
functioning worsens. Low estrogen levels are particularly
problematic for women and girls, who are already experiencing ADHD symptoms as a result of a neurotransmitter
imbalance. Hormonal changes occurring at
puberty can affect girls with ADHD, causing them to
become emotionally hyperreactive. These girls, as well
as women with ADHD, often tell me that they feel
like they are on an emotional roller coaster. Low estrogen
or widely fluctuating hormone levels may be the
underlying cause of this emotional turmoil.

 

>Low estrogen states occur prior to your menstrual
period each month, after you have a baby, and during
menopause, although hormone levels begin to decline
several years before your menses actually stops. This latter
stage is referred to as perimenopause and can begin
up to 10 years before actual menopause. (See Question
73 for a more in-depth discussion of menopause and its
effects on ADHD.) Symptoms shared by women in
low-estrogen states include depression, irritability, sleep
disturbance, anxiety, panic, difficulty concentrating,
and memory and cognitive dysfunction. Women with
ADHD frequently report a worsening of their ADHD
symptoms during these low-estrogen states. In addition
to worsening ADHD, each month, some women with
ADHD report that they experience both the physical
symptoms and the mildly depressed mood of PMS, or
the more severe depression and other disturbances of
premenstrual dysphoric disorder (PMDD), which can
significantly affect their ability to function.

 

 

Now why this happens is complicated for it is not one factor but multiple factors (aka not 1 or 2 female hormones but a collection of them). In addition how severe this is different in each woman (aka how big of a swing.)

But many of the female hormones are neuromodulators, where they can enhance the effects of certain neurotransmitters. Affecting the levels of these neuromodulators is an indirect way of affecting the effects of these neurotransmitters for the neuromodulator acts as a enhancer of these neurotransmitters. During certain times of the month higher levels of these female hormones (mainly estrogen) can enhance the functioning of dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin by 30%. Yet during certain times of the month this neurotransmitter boost does not exist.

 

• Note how best to treat this problem is different in each women. Some women respond best by going on certain forms of birth control that does not cause this sudden drop of estrogen. Furthermore the ratio of various female hormones in different birth controls are not the same so switching from one type of birth control to another may make a big difference.
  
  
• Sometimes doctors prescribed certain medicines such as SSRIs to be used not for the entire month but for this few day window every month to act as a booster. Note other medicines that can help are certain anti anxiety medicines, the stimulants, and the ADHD alpha 2 agonists (in this case Kapvay and Clonidine over Intuniv and Guanfacine. Normally Intuniv/Guanfacine is prefered over Kapvay for Intuniv is less likely to make you tired, but Kapvay/Clonidine has stronger effects on the anxiety and pain aspects but the downside of making you tired)
  
  
• Note thyroid hormones are also catecholamine (dopamine and norepinephrine) enhancers but are also involved in bodily repair and if there levels are not as they should be PMS both the pain but also the cognitive symptoms are worse. Furthermore messed up thyroid levels (too low or too high) can actually look like ADHD symptoms in non ADHD people, and enhance ADHD symptoms in ADHD people. Thyroid levels are also implicated in depression and often when an antidepressant does not work, sometimes thyroid enhancing medicines are used as an add on to the antidepressant.
  
  
• What I am saying is your doctor need to do some blood tests to rule out other things that can be enhancing these symptoms such as messed up thyroid levels, etc.
  
  
• Same logic applies for certain vitamins and minerals, and omega fats where you may need to supplement during this time frame, or add a higher dose of supplementation during this time of the month.
  
  ----
  
  The burnett seminars are yearly lectures about ADHD and learning disabilities at The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill
  
  http://learningcenter.unc.edu/ldadhd-services/burnett-seminars/
  
  Well check out the free video lecture and powerpoint slides that Dr. Patricia Quinn did about Women and ADHD. The link I gave above will show multiple lectures but click on the quinn one which will then direct you to download the video for free from itunes.
  
  Note there are other great lectures there from other ADHD experts. Dr Barkley, Dr Thomas E Brown, Dr. Ned Hallowell and Dr. John Ratey etc.

hug

It's gonna be tough, man. It's gonna be a battle. People generally have a very poor understanding of ADHD. It's hard for people with a fully operational frontal cortex to understand what it's like not to have that. I used to believe it when I was younger: if the problem's in your head, you can control it, right?

Not always. But it can take a while to appreciate that facet of reality.

I would suggest not to look to any administrations or medical practitioners to completely and effectively guide you toward being a functioning adult. I did (I'm in the US) and...they didn't help me beyond getting medication - which is part of the answer, I feel, but not the complete answer. In about ten years of looking for professional support, I've probably only met one expert with an intuitive understanding of ADHD-PI, and a handful of professionals who treat it as a serious disability.

You're going to have to fight your brain for executive control, and then you're going to have to fight a world that struggles to understand what that first fight means.

I would suggest reading everything you can about ADHD. I only recently discovered the Hunter Theory of ADHD by reading Attention Deficit Disorder: A Different Perception. Thom Hartmann talks a lot about how ADHDers are more suited for a nomadic existence, and how to adapt this genetic heritage to a modern society.

To be honest, I've felt some pushback from this sub when people have attempted to explore the Hunter theory, which seriously irritates me. I don't see how it even contradicts the latest scientific discoveries about ADHD. What's more, it has helped me tremendously to think of myself in this way rather than forcing myself to be neurotypical. I'm not. That's not going to change. So why not embrace the discrepancy and attempt to work with it?

Sorry for ranting. Hope some of it helped. Good luck!

I recently read Scattered: How Attention Deficit Disorder Originates and What You Can Do About It and it was so eye-opening that when I was done I immediately went back to the beginning and started again. It gave me so much hope that there's a chance my future kids could either avoid this fate, or if they do get it, that there's ways to help them improve without medication. At the end of the day, all your son wants and needs is love love love. Love on him as much as you can.

I take fish oil every day... great for the skin and brain... does nothing for my ADHD though. Tell your mom to read this book http://www.amazon.com/Attention-Deficit-Hyperactivity-Disorder-Third-Diagnosis/dp/159385210X/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1320122901&sr=8-3

It's awesome. It's the actually textbook Psychiatry students use to learn about ADHD. I highly recommend this book for anyone with ADD. You read this, and you will most likely know more then your psychiatrist.

I have read this book about the long-term damages caused by ADHD medication, it just blew my mind: https://www.amazon.com/LONG-TERM-EFFECTS-DRUGS-Antidepressants-ebook/dp/B01MTB5I9T
I highly recommend reading this out this before your child's future is destroyed by addictive and abusable stimulants the DEA keeps in the same class as meth and cocaine (Schedule II) due to their high abuse potential. Did you know that Canada recalled amphetamine based adhd meds off the market in 2005 but was persuaded to put them back on after the efforts of Addreall's manufacturer? Do not ignore that there is a black box warning on the labels of all amphetamine based ADHD drugs about how their high abuse potential can lead to sudden death, do not ignore how another black box warning on non-stimulant ADHD drugs like Strattera states the drugs can increase suicide rates. It will only take about an hour or so of your time to check out and prevent your child from living his or her life addicted to these drugs, and getting depression, anxiety and perhaps heart problems in about a year or two, all of this happened to my niece after 18 months on stimulants, parents need to beware. This is not fear mongering, the author supports her claim so well, like i said, it has blown my mind. Just wanted to share and encourage all parents to do their homework now instead of blindly trusting drug-pushers and taking chances on their own children's health. There are so many drug free options that work, as books like this demonstrate. This New Your Times article explains that psychiatrists only push drug treatments because of corrupted insurance laws that give them financial benefits if they prescribe drugs only: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/03/06/health/policy/06doctors.html?pagewanted=all
Now, do you really want to sacrifice your child's future to such vested interests for profit?

I highly recommend Scattered by Gabor Mate. Very insightful and helps explain how ADD originates and how adults can not just cope, but heal.

Hard-set routines for bedtime and wake-up time. Honestly as much as a lot of us ADHDers abhor routines they work really well for us when we’ve found the right one and can stick to it. Setting timers usually helps me a lot.

To being his routines, sit down with him and plot out an appropriate amount of time that he should strive for in getting to bed and getting up in the morning.

It may be good to start off with just the very basics like: “got out of bed in minutes. Dressed in minutes. Teeth brushed and came down stairs for breakfast in ___.” Or whatever the basics may look like for night time.

*One note here is that these routines can feed into each other! Like having him set out clothes for tomorrow the night before.

Something that’s helping me get out of bed is having a breakfast I look forward to! I have a bowl of Chocolate Honey Bunches of Oates 😋

I just found an awesome book on this kinda thing if you’re interested! here it is

This is a copy paste of an email I've sent a couple of friends. My child has dyslexia and I found these resources useful. The Amazon links are not affiliate links or anything, just links to the books. The first two books were especially intersting and useful, and will apply even as an adult!

Dyslexic Advantage - by Brock and Fernette Eide


Overcoming Dyslexia - by Sally Shaywitz - the first part of the book is the most interesting - it's the science of dyslexia - the second is strategies for teaching/learning


Some other books:
I read them all - at least mostly - but I can't separate the info in my memory to remember which was best at what

• http://www.amazon.com/Bright-Kids-Who-Cant-Keep/dp/1609184726
  
• http://www.amazon.com/The-Dyslexia-Empowerment-Plan-Confidence/dp/0345541235
  
• http://www.amazon.com/Smart-but-Scattered-Revolutionary-Executive/dp/1593854455
  
• http://www.amazon.com/Right-Brained-Children-Left-Brained-World-Unlocking/dp/0684847930
  
  Some good websites:
  
  
• http://dyslexia.yale.edu/
  
• http://www.davidsongifted.org/db/Articles_id_10435.aspx
  
• http://www.dyslexia.com/library/symptoms.htm
  
• https://www.understood.org/en
  
• https://www.understood.org/en/tools/tech-finder
  
• http://www.dyslexiaresourcegroup.com/
  
• http://dyslexia.yale.edu/EDU_signs.html < the yale site is good in general
  

Taking Charge of Adult ADHD

barkley is pretty much "the adhd guy," afaik it's his conception of the nature of adhd that's been the generally accepted one since he first published about it, and it's basically been his whole career

the chapters of "taking charge" where he describes his idea of the theoretical underpinnings of adhd fucking shook me to my core, it was so fascinating and so perfectly in line with my mental experience. Chs 8 and 9 i think.

actually, looking it up, he has a book i've never read that seems like it's entirely an expansion of those chapters for laypeople, so i'll probably go read that now

(http://www.amazon.com/Executive-Functions-What-They-Evolved/dp/146250535X is the one i just found)

https://www.amazon.com/Illustrated-Attention-Deficit-Hyperactivity-Disorder/dp/0521133157

Stahl's illustrated is a great academic source that a lay person, with an above average knowledge of biology, can still read and understand. It gives and overview the neurology and pharmacology of ADHD. If you wanted to read something even more scientific, you'd have to get into psychiatry and neurology textbooks and primary sources like studies. A university librarian would be able to point you in the right direction.

https://www.amazon.com/ADHD-Nation-Children-American-Epidemic/dp/1501105914

Yes! Music and eye-hand-coordination stuff does help. I do 30 sec and 1 min gesture drawings to get myself back to balance.

Also the safe-place-visualization works occasionally. I don’t know if there is a good instructions for it online, but one variant can be found from a book focused forward.

I found the safe place (and other methods in the book) to be much more effective when constructed with a support of someone else. Using the methods alone did not provide as good support.

Behavioral treatment paired with medication.
Here is the video where he talks about it.

As someone with ADHD who discovered JBP and Dr. Barkley's work recently as well, it really helped me to understand my own mind to a degree that helps me deal with the effects better. With any condition, I think it's easy to fall into the trap of feeling sorry for yourself in the course of having empathy for yourself. That's what JBP helped me to get past, and Dr. Barkley provides the methods by which you can do it. Things like using post-its and picking up a used pebble smart watch off eBay have helped me in my day to day life in measurable ways. It's still a struggle, but it's about adopting these small strategies along with medication and help from a medical professional. Here's one of the books he recommends as well.

Thanks! I've definitely seen some of that as I've read articles and things. Lol the stacks of books I have.... this is what I ordered. I asked a counselor friend for recommendations, and she didn't have any on hand but looked and liked the look of this (which I happened to already have in my cart!)

Thriving with Adult ADHD: Skills to Strengthen Executive Functioning https://smile.amazon.com/dp/1641522720/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_EHdBDb8P5DH99

Barkley was giving a talk on his "scientific" research. ADHD in adults: What the Science Says.

Taking Charge of Adult ADHD is a great one. I own that one and it has lots of practical tips on how to manage your ADHD.

https://www.amazon.com/Taking-Charge-Adult-Russell-Barkley/dp/1606233386/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1492364641&sr=8-1&keywords=taking+charge+of+adult+adhd

Also, this one explains how and why our brains evolved to have executive functions in the first place:

https://www.amazon.com/Executive-Functions-What-They-Evolved/dp/146250535X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1492364578&sr=8-1&keywords=executive+functions+barkley

It's more for deep understanding of human nature and why people with ADHD are so impaired.

Hello long time lurker here - but experienced with ADHD.

1. Intelligence and memory are linked - but that doesn't mean you are stupid because you forget things. You are clearly able to remember that you tend to forget and are actively trying to become better which seems pretty clever to me:
   
   a) Everyone forgets things - its very human to be imperfect. People with ADHD are not a different species.
   
   b) Without a strategy to remember little things (email yourself/note in zipped pocket) you should not blame yourself for not having 'total recall'.
   
   
2. There are lots of ways - but different things work for different people. I have tried Dropbox, Evernote, Voicemails, Dictaphones, Paper Planner etc but in the end the combination that works for me are:
   a) Online virtual linux workstation called cloud9IDE
   available at www.c9.io and create a text file for each major activity
   (shopping, bills etc) and then use time and date to write down my progress within each file. It autosaves automatically and can be accessed from any PC in the world.
   b) I wear the same (have a few pairs of) zipped trousers [5 zipped pockets] and always keep things in the same pockets (phone, keys, wallet etc...) this way I can even find things in the dark! - this was kind of inspired by Zen Habits http://zenhabits.net/ (everything in its place and a place for everything) - Landing Strip.
   c) Keep things in a routine - try and wake up around same time, do things in a fixed order in the morning, eat similar meals each day of the week (i.e. monday is stir fry day etc....).
   
   
3. Medication and coaching can go really well together. Reading this book helped me understand why: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Smart-But-Stuck-Emotions-Adults/dp/1501221604. I found that medication made me want sex less for the first week but then made me want it more. I have no idea why.
   
   
4. Crowded and intense places can feel overwhelming. I have used this breathing technique before when tense: http://www.medicaldaily.com/life-hack-sleep-4-7-8-breathing-exercise-will-supposedly-put-you-sleep-just-60-332122.
   In terms of the work thing its easy to get bored when people babble on and there is not a lot of stimulation. I sometimes volunteer to take minutes/records of meetings and that way my hands are busy and i have something to DO as it goes on (also this links to low frustration tolerance).
   
   
5. Disclosure is a really tricky one to answer. Personally I do not disclose because it is my personal health issue and I don't feel the need to involve them. I think if you can laugh off being a bit 'scatterbrained' at times with your co-workers it can be an endearing quality. Work can be dull and its the personalities that often make it fun. If you change the dynamic by disclosing that you have a disability/learning difference they can't really tease you for it without feeling like terrible human beings. It sounds like you have a good thing going on at work.. and your coping strategies and such will improve things. I only tell close friends and family because if you can't be honest with them - who can you be honest with?
   
   
6. I use the pomodoro technique - where you break a task down and estimate the number of 25 minute sessions it will take, then do them and write down how much you under/over run by.
   There is a free tool called https://pomotodo.com/ which is an online pomodoro tracker which I use. I found this book helpful emotionally: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Visual-CBT-Pictures-Cognitive-Behaviour/dp/0857083546
   
   
   "How do you stop yourself from feeling stupid? ..."
   
   By being positive about yourself and what you have achieved.
   
   Mini Goals and rewards are a way of doing this. I often try and trick myself by saying.. if I clean the kitchen I will reward myself with a sandwich etc.. and at the end of the day I can think about all the little victories, the number of 25 minute sessions I did, how much I have progressed on my tasks and feel happy that I am doing my best and making things happen.
   
   Also when I am very tired or things seem too much I have a 20 minute power-nap on the sofa and put on this eyemask.
   Always feel better after:
   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yN1oDIlV6lA
   
   Finally, there are two things:
   
   
7. ADHD does not define or control you - it is a part of you, like your elbows but it is not who you are. Over time you will get better and better at dealing with it and it will bother you less and less.
   This will require effort and trying different things - but you have already started :)
   
   
8. Stay Positive
   
   
   
   

this one i found really good, it gives you examples of patients the author has dealt with in the past in order to highlight that you can be "smart" and have ADHD. it also focuses on the emotional side of things and comorbidities etc. each chapter is a scenario about the patient and at the end it tells you what worked for them in terms of treatment and how they got on with that. it's not helpful in quite the same way, but it did make me feel like i'm not alone and that there is hope.

I'm sorry, but this attitude is not helpful, ADHD is a spectrum, and if you have it better than some others, it's not due to your intelligence, it's due to you falling closer to the "normal" side of the spectrum. As I said in my previous comment, it does not counteract symptoms, it may allow you to hide them better, or cope with them better, but it does not counteract them, I believe Dr. Barkley touches on this in his "Executive Functions" book, (http://www.amazon.com/Executive-Functions-What-They-Evolved-ebook/dp/B008CONJUY) and I'm sorry, but you will never be as good at executive functioning as you would be if you didn't have ADHD. No amount of "High IQ" will help that, you have a chemical dysfunction in your brain.

You can not compensate for a physical defect in your brain by being smart and trying harder, just like you can not compensate for being diabetic by exercising more, the two are barely related, no matter how much you run your pancreas is still going to have a dysfunction, and no matter how smart you are your executive functions are always going to be deficient. If you wish to disagree with this sentiment that's fine, I simply think you should reconsider your stance.

On topic, I am on adderall, and for the most part it calms me, allows me to stop worrying, allows me to remember things. I am the person I've always wanted to be when on my medication, the person I always told myself that "one day" I would be, I run, I go to bed early, I pay my bills when they come in, I don't impulse buy, I don't eat like shit anymore. I am happy, becuase I am able to think forward.

And in addition, I am able to focus, I am able to decide what to think about, I am able to tell myself "Okay, I'm gonna work on this for an hour, and not open reddit" and then do it. When I am not on my medication I can not do these things. I ma happy, becuase I am able to accomplish my goals.

Ritalin may not be the medication for you, as it is different than adderall or vyvanse, I can't comment on it much as I've never taken it, but everything you describe sounds like me premedication. Medication for ADHD is interesting in a lot of ways though, I know for a fact that too high of a dosage of Adderall can cause worrying and anxiety. Also, you may wish to talk to your doctor about any kind of birth control you are on, while it probably varies from person to person, the BC I was on when combined with adderall made me depressed in the afternoons. Just a thought.

https://www.amazon.com/ADHD-Nation-Children-American-Epidemic/dp/1501105914
https://www.nytimes.com/2016/10/16/magazine/generation-adderall-addiction.html
http://web.missouri.edu/~segerti/1050H/docs/AngellNYRB.pdf
http://www.zonein.ca/eletter/2011/sept/part2.pdf
ADHD medications got passed in a similar slapdash way
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3813924/#!po=0.781250
https://www.leonardsax.com/stimulants.html