(Part 2) Best christian death & grief books according to redditors

Being new to the Reformed tradition, you should absolutely start Jamie Smith's excellent book Letters to a Young Calvinist: An Invitation to the Reformed Tradition. It's a quick easy read best digested in small parts. It does a great job of providing an overview of the Reformed tradition that is accessible, theological, and pastoral and is the best antidote to the "cage-stage" that I know of.

Other general books on the Reformed tradition I would recommend:

• Calvinism in the Las Vegas Airport: Making Connections in Today's World by Richard Mouw.
  
  
• Chosen by God and The Holiness of God both by R.C. Sproul.
  
  
• A Sure Thing: What We Believe and Why by Cornelius Plantiga is a great, but it's more of a teen devotional than a theological treatise. A more "adult" introduction would be Robert De Moor's Reformed: What It Means, Why It Matters.
  
  
• For a higher level survey of Reformed theology (think college level) go with R. Michael Allen's Reformed Theology
  
  
• You should also read through some of the Reformed Confessions. Start with the Heidelberg Catechism, it's amazing.
  
  If you are looking for a topical treatment from a Reformed perspective I recommend:
  
  
• [Sin] Not the Way It's Supposed to Be: A Breviary of Sin by Cornelius Plantinga.
  
  
• [Homosexuality] Washed and Waiting: Reflections on Christian Faithfulness and Homosexuality by Wesley Hill.
  
  
• [Suffering] [Rejoicing in Lament: Wrestling with Incurable Cancer and Life in Christ] (http://www.amazon.com/Rejoicing-Lament-Wrestling-Incurable-Cancer/dp/1587433583) by J. Todd Billings
  
  
• [The Sacraments] Christ, Baptism and the Lord's Supper: Recovering the Sacraments for Evangelical Worship
  
  
• [Caring for the poor] When Helping Hurts: How to Alleviate Poverty Without Hurting the Poor . . . and Yourself by Steve Corbett and Brian Fikkert.
  
  Once you are ready to dive into heavier works consider:
  
  
• Calvin's Instittutes of the Christian Religion (free CCEL link)
  
  
• The abridged version of Reformed Dogmatics by Herman Bavink.
  
  
• Systematic Theology
  
  
• Reformed Catholicity: The Promise of Retrieval for Theology and Biblical Interpretation by R. Michael Allen and Scott Swain
  
  
• Karl Barth's Church Dogmatics: An Introduction and Reader by Allen
  
  
• Christian Dogmatics: Reformed Theology for the Church Catholic ed. by Allen and Swain. I'm still working my way through this one - it's very good.
  
  
  

READ LOVECRAFT, or read this very short (<10 pp.) exploration of Lovecraft and the uncanny from Mark Fisher contained in this longer book: https://www.amazon.com/Weird-Eerie-Mark-Fisher/dp/1910924385

His entire thesis on Lovecraft is this: that Lovecraft makes the unreal real, the immaterial material, and that he in all cases makes the weird and uncanny of this world

The difference that Fisher establishes between Lovecraft's work and the fiction of other weird fantasy writers is to say that Lovecraft's work shows that the foreign/uncanny has the same materiality as does the native/normative.

It is not walden or thoreau. Not sure what you're writing about specifically but Fisher's book is a good help I think

lmk if you cite this, Fisher recently died and its important we get him reborn

> ... explaining the Near-Death Experience phenomena.

Well... if you like to jump to conclusions.

Check out this book for an example of one experience, among others, that occurred during a time when the brain was in a state where it was almost completely off - registering no activity at all.

Here are their top picks for each category:

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Apologetics/Evangelism - Evangelism in a Skeptical World: How to Make the Unbelievable News About Jesus More Believable

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Biblical Studies - Lexham Geographic Commentary on the Gospels

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Children and Youth - The Friend Who Forgives

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Christian Living/Discipleship - The Gospel Comes with a House Key: Practicing Radically Ordinary Hospitality in Our Post-Christian World

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The Church/Pastoral Leadership - Preaching as Reminding: Stirring Memory in an Age of Forgetfulness

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CT Women - Perfectly Human: Nine Months with Cerian

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Culture and the Arts - Why Should the Devil Have All the Good Music?: Larry Norman and the Perils of Christian Rock

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Fiction - An Extra Mile: A Story of Embracing God’s Call

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History/Biography - The Spirit of Early Evangelicalism: True Religion in a Modern World

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Missions/Global Church - Megachurch Christianity Reconsidered: Millennials and Social Change in African Perspective

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Politics and Public Life - Scars Across Humanity: Understanding and Overcoming Violence Against Women

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Spiritual Formation - Subversive Sabbath: The Surprising Power of Rest in a Nonstop World

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Theology/Ethics - Seeing God: The Beatific Vision in Christian Tradition

> This makes Colton Burpo the only little adorable liar to still claim he died, saw God, and then came back and cashed in.

Hah! What?

Richard Sigmund

Trudy Harris (on behalf of others)

Mary Neal

Eben Alexander

Marvin Besteman

Crystal McVea

Dale Black

James Garlow (on behalf of others)

Seneca Sodi

Sid Roth (on behalf of others)

Reggie Anderson


and on and on and Ariston...

The following works are pretty nerdy, I would say. They were assigned throughout the course of my undergraduate studies in theology and think that they serve as excellent primers to the intellectual side of Catholicism.

Joseph Ratzinger, The God of Jesus Christ. Highly recommended as a beautiful exposition of the Catholic concept of God.

Ratzinger, Introduction to Christianity.

Ratzinger, In the Beginning...: A Catholic Understanding of the Story of Creation and the Fall.

Ratzinger, God and the World. A fantastic survey of essential Catholic doctrines and beliefs.

Gustavo Gutiérrez, A Theology of Liberation. A genius work that reminds us that God is on the side of the poor, that he casts down the mighty from their thrones and lifts up the lowly.

Hans Urs von Balthasar, Life Out of Death. A short but beautiful meditation on what it means to die and rise with Christ.

And then, of course, there are the classics. Augustine's Confessions, Aqunas' Summa, Athanasius' On the Incarnation, Benedict's Rule, Anselm's Proslogion, Bonaventure's Mind's Road to God, etc.

I enjoyed this book, What Happens After I Die by Michael Allen Rogers which gives a more fullsome answer. In short, Revelation 21 says we will be with God who will dwell bodily among us and "He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away." All things will be made new.

The Problem of Suffering and the Goodness of God - Ravi Zacharias at Johns Hopkins: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7-gP1gC8gM&app=desktop

Why Series | Why Suffering: Suffering and Jesus | Nabeel Qureshi: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=psrvQZj68h4&app=desktop

Nabeel Qureshi on Suffering, Death, and the Cross: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tv3KruwUDWk&app=desktop

Dr Nabeel Qureshi's Response to a Lady Suffering With Multiple Sclerosis: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U-Q2VJnHIFE&app=desktop

Rethinking Life After Death (NT Wright): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rZC6tbgpsl4&app=desktop

C.S. Lewis on Heaven and the New Earth: God's Eternal Remedy to the Problem of Evil and Suffering: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gs5VzPK8rw0&app=desktop

C.S. Lewis - The Problem of Pain: https://www.amazon.ca/Problem-Pain-C-S-Lewis/dp/0060652969

Why Suffering?: Finding Meaning and Comfort When Life Doesn't Make Sense by Ravi Zacharias and Vince Vitale: https://www.amazon.com/Why-Suffering-Finding-Meaning-Comfort/dp/145554969X

Heaven by Randy Alcorn: https://www.amazon.com/Heaven-Randy-Alcorn/dp/0842379428/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2KI1OVDBGB8J6&keywords=randy+alcorn+heaven+book&qid=1566624191&s=books&sprefix=Randy+Alcorn+heaven%2Cstripbooks-intl-ship%2C150&sr=1-1

Everything you described boils down to one thing: You are lonely and starving for love. Feeling "well-liked" or approved by others, pornography, and so forth are all shallow "foods" to feed this one hunger. And as long as you remain hungry for love, you will find yourself continuously eating the wrong things.

Some ideas:

1. Trade being "approved/liked" for being "known." You want to be liked, so you wear masks tailored to the people you are with. (Extreme forms of this can turn into Borderline Personality Disorder.) Try working some parts of your life that only seem acceptable in one "sphere" and tip-toeing them over into other areas. Then live with the tension...or acceptance...that this creates.
   
   
2. ADD can often be accompanied by huge impulse control problems and emotional imbalances. This is a neurochemical issue, and the reason why ADD/OCD/antidepressants exist. (ADD, OCD, and mood disorder can overlap a whole lot.) I would suggest looking into asking a doctor or therapist about those options.
   
   
3. Consider some healing literature. Books like Abba's Child and More Than an Aspirin (or other therapeutic Christian reading materials) can work wonders for making Christ's healing practical and effectual. While scripture devotion/study is a good thing, the act of reading the Bible is NOT a one-habit-solves-all-problems solution.
   
   
4. A word on pornography. This is an addiction. Treat this not primarily a some kind of secret, hidden sin (even though it is also that), but as a neurochemical drug you are unable to stop using. Groups like Celebrate Recovery or Sex Addicts Anonymous can be crucial to breaking out of such patterns. ("I can't stop" is different from "I can't stop on my own.")
   
   http://www.amazon.com/More-Than-Aspirin-Christian-Perspective/dp/1572932570
   
   http://www.amazon.com/Abbas-Child-Heart-Intimate-Belonging/dp/1576833348/
   
   http://www.celebraterecovery.com/index.php/cr-groups
   
   http://saa-recovery.org/Meetings/
   

Hope Beyond Hell

Best book from after death

http://www.amazon.com/Heaven-Hell-NW-CENTURY-EDITION/dp/0877854769

Awesome! Here's the central churches website (you can get further support there, if not from me): https://newchurch.org/

Here are some amazon versions of our books on: heaven and hell, the doctrine of life and a verse by verse explanation of revelation (pretty tough at first). I'd recommend starting with the doctrine of life, as it is easier to grasp and links to well known concepts like the 10 commandments.

Heaven and hell: https://www.amazon.com/HEAVEN-HELL-PORTABLE-NEW-CENTURY/dp/0877854068/ref=sr_1_1?crid=EI7FV0RXJI2T&keywords=heaven+and+hell+emanuel+swedenborg&qid=1568746466&s=gateway&sprefix=heavne+and+hell+%2Caps%2C412&sr=8-1

Doctrine of life: https://www.amazon.com/Doctrine-Life-Emanuel-Swedenborg-ebook/dp/B00D33AMV8/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=doctrine+of+life+swedenborg&qid=1568746531&s=gateway&sr=8-1

Revelation revealed: https://www.amazon.com/Apocalypse-Revealed-Emanuel-Swedenborg-ebook/dp/B01JLWWML2/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=apocalypse+revelead+swedenborg&qid=1568746599&s=gateway&sr=8-1-spell

Further resources which may be useful:

https://swedenborg.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/swedenborg_foundation_life.pdf; (free ebook)

https://www.youtube.com/user/offTheLeftEye

Please ask me any questions and ill try offer support. If you want any of the books free, not off amazon, I can share them, although some of the amazon versions are nice. I've been with the church 15 years, and feel like ive grown to be a better person, though it is not without hard times (carrying my cross).

You didn't even read the comments, since that first paragraph not only does it put words in my mouth that I never said. It tells me you just refused a proven idea. Read the books.

You need to read if you want an argument. stop being lazy. If you want to understand my point of view you have to enter to the discussion with knowledge of why I believe what I believe. It's not only the God presented in Christianity, it's more than that; that's why I sent you to read Leo Tolstoy and Gandhi too.

If I notice you miss information that unproves your dialog, I gave you the ways to find that missing information. I won't babysit you; no wonder you just repeat everything. I answered and explained everything you asked for; you didn't like the responce, I told you where you can find more information, you say "nope, i dont' want to".

You show no interest in learning or even thinking on others opinions. You simply refuse them without validation, you just stayed in your own mentality and think that anything that challenges your ideals is not worth the effort. That's being closed minded and ignorant. So I guess you're right, the conversation lost it's value when you decided to ignore the points being discussed.

I answered all of your questions. That you don't accept them is not my problem.

I'll leave the books here for people that find this thing and aren't afraid to challenge their knowledge.

The kingdom of God is within you

Gandhi an Authobiography

The fifth mountain

When God doesn't make sense

I am really, really sorry. My wife had a miscarriage in March of 2015. It was an incredibly difficult time; we had been trying for almost 3 years with no success, then that happened. It really threw her theology for a loop; she was angry with God, me, and generally anyone who had a baby.

I highly recommend going to see a good biblical counselor. I am an idiot and didn't have us start going to a counselor until 6 months after the miscarriage, and it would have radically helped her healing process in the moment, I believe.

Also, I can almost guarantee there is another woman in your church that has dealt with this tragedy. I've seen some studies that claim almost half of pregnancies end in miscarriage (granted, many occur even before the mother knows she is pregnant). But the point is that this is extremely common and, like /u/rdavidson24 said, we just don't talk about it, to the detriment of our people.

So, go talk to one of them, often. I think my wife would be able to say now that she can see the incredible ministry opportunity that has come from her miscarriage. Our struggle with pregnancy, the pregnancy itself, the miscarriage, and the recovery were all very public in our church: we were prayed for by the whole congregation for in the worship service a few times and I know that several small groups prayed for us each week during all 4 phases of the journey. And now, my wife is the go-to person in our church for women to talk to because they know she went through it, they saw her pain and (if we're being honest) hatred toward God for a while, and now they see her recovery and complete trust in Him for what has happened.

Those would be my top recommendations. We need community and people to talk to. There is a reason we are part of a body of believers.

As far as books and other secondary resources, you might try:

• A Place of Healing by Joni Eareckson Tada
  
  
• Trusting God: Even When Life Hurts by Jerry Bridges
  
• Definitely this one Inheritance of Tears: Trusting the Lord of Life When Death Visits the Womb by Jessalyn Hutto.
  
  Jessayln also blogged about miscarriage for a while, but I can't find the exact articles, I'm sorry. Here is her blog, though.
  
  Some other articles include:
  
  
• Looking to Christ in the Loss of a Child
  
• THROW OPEN THE DOORS
  
• Life after Miscarriage: God’s Goodness & Mercy in Pain
  
  Again, I am so sorry you are going through this. God loves you. God loves your baby. I know that's hard to hear and sounds like a bunch of crap right now. But do not let Satan tempt you to doubt in the dark what God has revealed in the light. I will be praying for you and your husband.

This book

It's very accessible and relevant to your questions.

It is so hard...and hard to see anything good of it in the midst. You deserve some good alone time!! Seriously...we should never feel guilty for filling up our tanks. it is necessary!! Here is a great book from two ladies that dealt/deal with Chronic illness. I thought it was so helpful. https://www.amazon.com/Hope-When-Hurts-reflections-suffering/dp/1784980730

I think you might really benefit from reading any one of a number of Philip Yancey's books. Disappointment With God, What's So Amazing About Grace, The Question That Never Goes Away, and Where Is God When It Hurts? are all books that help Christians wrestle with some of the hardest questions and issues of the Christian existence, and Yancey writes with a refreshing lack of cliche. He rejects the "Christianese" and pat answers that have infected the church since the self-help movement got a real foothold back in the 70's and 80's and instead chooses to deal with those questions in ways that are honest, direct, scripturally sound, and ultimately invite healing and life. I hope they help you as much as they've helped me over the years.