(Part 3) Top products from r/TooAfraidToAsk

Your Money or Your Life was a pretty good book that explained this well. The audiobook is narrated by the author and if given the chance, I'd hold her underwater until the bubbles stopped. She had the worst voice I've ever heard.

The Millionaire Fastlane was also a readyy good read. Highly recommended.

The Millionaire Next Door was a fantastic read and the book that got me started thinking about financial independence and the concept of FIRE. It's a bit dated (late 90s I think) but still some amazing information in there.

Check us out at /r/financialindependence and /r/leanfire. If you haven't, definitely visit /r/personalfinance and check out the sidebar and wiki - there's some AMAZING information and guides for all ages and walks of life.

I wish so hard that I found out about this stuff and had the resources available now when I was 18, and not when I turned 31. But oh well, such is life.

/u/typhuslol do feel free to PM me if you want to chat! I'm happy to share the lessons I've learned in the past few years of pursuing financial independence!

I strongly recommend Models: Attract Women Through Honesty. Part of what Mark Manson talks about is that women can sense your intention a mile away, and to me, it seems that you are unaware of what your actual intentions are. I will be honest, I stopped reading as soon as I got to abilities/talents and saw you listed height on there. What you have is a form of entitlement.

What do I mean by that? I mean by the way to presented info on yourself, I am under the impression that since you are X Y and Z you should have a girlfriend since you have a lot of assets. Unless you want a casual fuck, you won’t get far with that kind of attitude. Women don’t like being seen as object that want to be won.

Your assets are great to have. You don’t have to put as much leg work as the next guy, but you still have to put in work. To spoil Mark’s book, the biggest part of the subduction process is making yourself vulnerable by putting your heart on the line and risking rejection for it. The only reason why you should approach a girl is because you find her attractive/cute. Not for bragging rights, not for getting more experiences, not for anything else.

Honestly, I think Mark’s book will give you the tools you need to figure this out. It has helped me in a number of ways. Though I only finished the book 3 weeks ago and I’m still looking, I feel more confident in myself to attract a woman that will make me happy.

Not at all!

Having the ability to shut out the noise and just think is an admirable skill and always has been. Check out this for a philosophical basis for that statement, as well as this essay by Nobel prize winner Bertrand Russell where he talks about the virtues of doing nothing. There are also any number of modern books about how just stopping and quieting your mind is tremendously important for both your understanding of the world and your mental health.

I've never understood people who run around frantically trying to be occupied and "productive" 24/7. There's obviously a time and place for it, but always?

It might sound silly, but the ability to contemplate is a gift, and a sign of intelligence.

I deleted another snarky response because that doesn't do anything but make me feel better. You give enough of a shit about this topic to make all these posts so here's my honest response. Even if you're right about a topic and don't think you can be convinced otherwise, it is intellectually invaluable to be able to take the other side's position to better understand your own. Read this if only to bolster your own beliefs on this topic, and maybe consider some things that possibly haven't crossed your mind before
https://www.amazon.com/Race-Matters-25th-Anniversary-Introduction/dp/0807008834

Respect.

The current state of media consumption in the US tends to reinforce our own ideas. Conservatives watch Fox, etc. Liberals watch MSNBC, etc. Same with websites and what we view on different websites. Someone could be a subscriber to T_D or socialism or neoliberal, but unlikely to all. And on video sites, we get more of the same. Both sides often talk past each other, using the incomplete information they've been given, without really thinking about it thoroughly.

Whenever you think you understand something, there is always more to learn, always more questions. For instance, you mention that the USA over time has favored more liberal policies. This is the idea of progress, which is one of many metanarratives or overarching worldviews. But you might be surprised to learn that the US historically has cared much less about that and more about its own interest in power. The US has overthrown democratically elected governments and installed right-wing dictators around the world.

This isn't crazy. It's totally, completely normal, and a sign that you're actually a well-put-together human being.

If that, and the other comments here, aren't convincing enough, check out The Imp of the Mind: Exploring the Silent Epidemic of Obsessive Bad Thoughts by clinical psychologist (and Harvard professor) Lee Baer.

In the book, Baer talks about these thoughts and his own experiences working with patients with concerns about them. His thesis is as follows:

Your brain explores ideas. That's just what it does. You sit there, you're bored, and your brain just comes up with stuff.

When your brain comes up with an idea that your moral values find distasteful, it's totally normal to think, "Hey that's a bad idea." But just leave it there. There's no need to feel any shame whatsoever about those ideas.

Some people feel incredible shame about this totally natural behavior of your brain, and they shouldn't. (The shame itself is totally natural, too, and possibly a sign of good moral functioning -- but, it should be corrected once someone understands that these sorts of thoughts can't be helped and are totally natural themselves.)

Baer offers some techniques for letting go of the shame associated with intrusive thoughts. The basic idea is just embrace that your brain is playing with a silly idea (feel free to have a laugh!), and then gently let go of it. Having an intrusive thought does not mean that you're a bad person, or that you would ever act on that thought. It's just the totally natural behavior of your brain. Celebrate that everything is working right up there.

Sometimes just seeking is enough. Seeking in and of itself can be a purpose. It will lead you to places you can't even imagine right now, both professionally and in terms of your personal development/happiness, if you consciously make it a priority in your life

What could you do today to imbue your life with meaning? If you can't answer that question, what could you do to start figuring out what is meaningful to you? Some ideas:

1. Research world religions and attend a service of the one that makes the most sense to you, even it doesn't come from your culture.
   
2. Sign up for classes that interest you at a community college. Don't worry about degrees, etc, just choose something you genuinely want to learn about.
   
3. Start the process of volunteering for a cause that seems worthwhile to you.
   
4. Plan and start saving for an extended trip. You're 19 and it sounds like you don't have any big commitments. Spend 6 months backpacking around Africa, or India, or Latin America, or the Carribean, or Southeast Asia. Volunteer or work abroad.
   
5. Look into joining the Peace Corps or Americorps, or whatever the equivalent to those things in your country is.
   
6. Start looking into living in an ashram or a monastery so you can spend some time thinking about what it's all for and learning from other seekers just like you.
   
   Those are just 6 random ideas off the top of my head. Maybe none of those sound interesting to you, but there's something you can do today.
   
   Suggested reading:
   
   We're All Doing Time by Bo Lozoff

Did you even bother to read the articles you posted?

1. Examination of developing brains - differences in white matter.
   
2. This works slightly in your case - but only shows that there might be size differences in different areas of the brain.
   
3. Again, an analysis of developing brains
   
4. This is from 1991.
   
5. From the abstract - "we did not find any significant difference in global WM volume between males and females."
   
6. This study is on rats.
   
7. "Our study demonstrates that, although
   there are sex/gender differences in the brain, human brains do not
   belong to one of two distinct categories: male brain/female brain."
   
8. This really doesn't include any research but rather attempts to persuade for further investigation in brain sex research.
   
   Conventional research suggests that although there are small differences in some areas of the brain between males and females, these differences are not very large and there is a ton of overlap between. There is not a distinguishable "male" or "female" brain that we can definitely identify. Therefore, it doesn't make sense to say that transgender have a brain of the opposite sex. Some recent studies have shown that people with gender dysphoria may instead have disconnectivity within networks involved in body perception.
   
   If you want to read a great book that examines the history of brain sex studies and debunks the male/female brain hypothesis, read Cordelia Fine's book Delusions of Gender.

I (44m) was recently diagnosed with adult ADHD and for me what goes through my mind is ..... Everything... all at once.... over and over and over again. Often the thoughts are then punctuated with a feelings of guilt for being such a fuck up under achiever. I can’t remember anything I’m not interested in and I find it impossible to finish almost any task. I have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety previously and I believe both are a direct result of my ADHD. I was so relived when got a the diagnosis as it allowed me to feel a bit “less” guilty for my personality. It’s nice to know that there is some sort of reason for the way I have always been. Definitely an emotional relief to realize that I am different then most others and that there is an actual reason why am the way I am. The ADHD meds seem to help with focus, but there are a lot of tactical things I still need to address in order to live my best life. The diagnosis was just the start of my journey and I have a long way to go. I would take a look at FAST MINDS by Surman/Bilkey if you would like to understand more about how folks with ADHD operate and practice methods to change that operation.

https://www.amazon.com/Fast-Minds-Thrive-Think-Might/dp/0425274063/ref=nodl_

Americans have a strong mythology about WW2. The US was pure and good, the Germans and Japanese dark and evil. By opposing them, the US saved the world. American viewers are warm and welcoming towards this message.

https://www.amazon.ca/Empire-Their-Own-Invented-Hollywood/dp/0385265573

And yes the Jewish factor is strong in Hollywood. No one kind of admits this openly but it's real.

The Magnesium Miracle (Second Edition) https://www.amazon.com/dp/0399594442/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_DcEyDb6TVS92S


Plenty of evidence about this.
People CURING - Alzheimer’s, fibromyalgia, adhd, insomnia, pms, muscle cramping, Parkinson’s, and so much more

Extreme poverty is actually the lowest than it has ever been, and it's getting better everyday.

We are not perfect yet, and there's still a lot to be done, but I do have a lot of hope for the future.

This book will possibly change how you view the world:
https://www.amazon.com/Factfulness-Reasons-World-Things-Better/dp/1250107814/ref=nodl_

http://factfulnessquiz.com/

Sounds like you just have some soul searching to do. You aren't a bad person for doing bad things. Good people make bad decisions. The first step in changing is becoming aware, which you seem to be.



Now take your realization and turn it into a teaching moment. You recognize that you did not like who you were being. Now decide what kind of person you would like to be and work on being that person.



You would probably really like the book Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself by Dr. Joe Dispenza


*link

It's a lot more complicated than that. Recommended reading for you: https://www.amazon.com/Gothic-Architecture-Scholasticism-Erwin-Panofsky/dp/0970821654

Kindof like blackface, it was used in really really bad ways, so bad you cannot even joke about it. Certain peeps took white pride and went entirely too far, to the burning cross’ point, along with other practices. I just bought this book, I cannot go a few pages without putting it down...

https://www.amazon.com/Everyone-Turtleback-School-Library-Binding/dp/0613685725 ....?

https://www.amazon.com/White-Fragility-People-About-Racism/dp/0807047414

you might need this

>What is the actual point

The point is to discover a purpose for yourself, and then to continue to achieve that purpose. Check out Purpose-driven Life from a library or on Kindle for a full explanation.

I'm of the mind that happily pregnant women who engage in bad practices during pregnancy are typically 1) ignorant of or don't believe in the effect it is having on the fetus (i.e. "My mom smoked with me and I turned out fine!"), or 2) are deeply struggling with addiction (and furthermore, scared to seek help, as they know they will be judged and potentially prosecuted/jailed).

With this in mind, I think most in most cases, women need information, education, and non-judgmental assistance to keep their pregnancies as healthy as they can manage. I really don't see it as a point on the "my body, my choice" continuum, you know?

Also, for what it's worth, discussions like this always remind me of Lynn Paltrow, quoted in Jennifer Block’s Pushed: The Painful Truth About Childbirth and Modern Maternity Care: "[We live in] … a culture that celebrates the woman who conceives quadruplets after multiple fertility treatments- treatments that put the fetuses at risk for severe prematurity, neurological damage, and death- yet imprisons the woman who puts her fetus at far less risk with illegal drug use."

I stated previously that 80% of women want 20% of men, and that women are prone to gold digging. As far as gold digging goes, women are instinctively looking for mates that will be capable protectors and providers. In our modern day, that measurement is money and status. Look at someone like Bill Gates. He has all the money and status, and he is considered the most successful man. Because of that status, he would be the most capable of providing everything for a wife and kids. That's what women look for. So, if money and status is the quality women want, then reason would state that women would always be looking for men with more money. Hence, women are naturally gold diggers.

This article explains the cause and effect of women being able to exercise their dating preference to the extreme.
https://quillette.com/2019/03/12/attraction-inequality-and-the-dating-economy/
I also said that it is quite easy to ruin a mans life in a false accusation of rape or sexual assault. Here are a few names and stories to google.
Mark Weiner, who drove a women to her house on a rainy day. he got 8 years for a false crime
Alec Holowka, falsely accused by Zoe Quinn, committed suicide over the accusations.
Stephen Elliott, an author who was accused anonymously, had his life turned upside down for no reason.
Youtuber Tobuscus, let a female friend over to his house, and she tried to initiate romance with him. Toby refused, and she accused him of assault.
Paul Nungesser, a college student who was accused of rape by Emma Sulkowicz after a one night fling. Paul did receive a positive outcome, but his name is forever attached to a rape accusation.

All these cases derailed and ruined various men's lives, but the problem of false allegations is not just in rape, but in other charges too.

Domestic violence is used frivolously in divorce cases to gain leverage over opposing parties. This can cause much harm to either gender, but with over 75% of divorces initiated by women, according National Center for Health Statistics, men are by and large the victims.
https://www.mikeglaw.com/false-accusations-domestic-violence-common-divorce-custody/

it is becoming so common now, that women are writing how to books directly about using false allegations about rape and such as weapons.
https://www.amazon.com/How-Destroy-Man-Now-DAMN/dp/099982032X

So, women look for the top 20% of men, women are natural gold diggers, and women can easily use false rape and domestic violence to harm men. All these lead to a tough and potentially toxic dating environment where most men are left behind, and the ones that are not, have a loaded gun pointed at their heads. this is why dating and marriage are bad for men in 2019. you can say I'm wrong; you can say I'm sexist, but reality backs me up.