Reddit reviews Massage Table Massage Bed Spa Bed PU Portable 84 Inches 2 Fold Heigh Adjustable Massage Table Bed w/Free Carry Case Facial Cradle Salon Tattoo Bed

Is it low libido? Is it lack of interest because the sex just hasn't been very good for her and she no longer expects anything for herself? Or is the relationship itself dying? There's really no way for us to tell.

Start with libido. There are so many things that can contribute to low libido that it's impossible to guess from your post which ones apply. Stress, poor sleep, medications, other drugs, depression, low thyroid, lack of exercise, weight loss, weight gain, body issues, and on and on.

Your first step should be to think seriously about all of these. Look up the side effects of every med and other drug or supplement she takes regularly. Urge her to go to the doctor for a thorough checkup. Try to get her to join you in an exercise program like CrossFit that includes strength as well as cardio. It can pay huge dividends in energy and libido.

If stress might be a factor, take up meditation. 15 minutes a day can be a major help in combating stress. Also get an inexpensive folding massage table, some beach towels or bath sheets, and some coconut oil, and learn how to give each other sensual, full-body massages. (Stress reduction + intimacy + love/affection + OMG that feels good + great foreplay = major win!)

Finally, seriously rethink how you have sex. One of the most common reasons why women gradually lose interest during the first few years in a relationship is having routine sex that is too short and rarely (if ever) leads to orgasms.

When you have sex, how long do you spend on kissing her and caressing her body? How about extended foreplay for her? You mention oral, but for how long and how many orgasms does she normally get before you start PIV?

It doesn't matter whether your schedules are tight and you both feel rushed, or you're horny and impatient to get to the "main event," or she's impatient and brushing off your attempts at extended foreplay because she sees it as a chore/waste of time. Whatever the reason, if sex has gotten compressed into a 10-20 minute routine, the result is usually that it's not doing anything for her.

Often this is as much the woman's fault as anything, because she has been faking orgasms from the beginning of the relationship and otherwise failing to provide any honest feedback, so her partner has no idea that anything's wrong. In one survey of couples married more than three years, over 70% of the men said their wives usually or always had an orgasm during sex. Only about a quarter of the wives said the same thing. So there's a LOT of playacting going on by a lot of unsatisfied women. And the top reasons for faking it were A) he gets upset if I don't come, and B) to get it over with sooner, because I know I'm not going to get an orgasm from PIV anyway.

But it doesn't really matter why a couple gets in the habit of having short routine sex. As one of the mods over on u/sexover30 put it, in a post that I strongly recommend:

> What I have observed is that there is a clear relationship between the type and duration of the typical sexual encounter and the maintenance of strong sexual attraction in long-term pairs. People who exclusively have sex in short bursts (e.g., routine bedtime sex lasting 15 minutes or less) and who spend little time on other kinds of affectionate physical contact are much less likely to stay sexually attracted to each other for years.

That's actually from a comment below the main post, but the post itself was published in 4 or 5 places on Reddit, including Bestof, and received 20,000+ upvotes combined, because it helped a lot of people who are in your situation understand what was going on.

I recently pulled together some collections of excellent sex ed articles by the same mod. These two have some articles that I think would help you:

Better Sex 101 -- especially:

• the title article, "Better Sex 101"
  
  
• everything under "Focus on the ladies" and "For both of you."
  
  Orgasm Trouble, PE, Libido, and Dead Bedrooms -- especially:
  
  
• "How Women Can Become (More) Orgasmic"
  
  
• "Stress and Arousal"
  
  
• "What Lesbian Couples Can Teach Straight Couples About Good Sex"
  
  
• "Escaping a Dead Bedroom"
  
  Two final notes. First, I strongly recommend doing Sensate Focus Therapy if she's willing. It's a form of sex therapy first pioneered by Masters & Johnson 60 years ago, and it has been refined into the gold standard therapy for helping couples (re)connect in terms of physical and emotional intimacy. If you went to a sex therapist, this is very probably what they would tell you to do, but you don't need a therapist to do it.
  
  And second, my husband and I are big fans of a secular (non-spiritual) kind of tantric sex. This is a good intro: What is Tantric Sex?. We've been together almost 12 years and have been doing tantra for more than six. The sex is terrific and it is also great at promoting love and intimacy. And it's the perfect follow-up to doing SFT.
  
  I hope this helps!

Looks like some kind of massage table, probably customized or sold for bdsm

Okay. Massage table is ordered. Yoni and lingam massages done right from now on. I'm so done using the bed for those.

I bought this one and my SO and i use it for massages and post massage naps. Not that much money, folds up in the closet, sturdy, and would be totally comfortable for a face down nap. My gf was skeptical but after one massage/nap she was on board.

As it happens, I spent a day with a "closed poly" family recently, and they are big into 4-handed massage. I JUST posted this article last night about it:

• Bram & Kat & Gunter & Ann: A Tantric Foursome
  
  The article doesn't go into any details, but the basic technique is simple enough. The recipient needs to start lying face down on a massage table, with a massage giver standing on either side. The two givers don't have to stay opposite each other, but usually they do, so their hands are mirror images of each other. u/Tantragirl and her husband gave me a massage that way last spring when they came to stay with us for a few days, and it was a lot of fun.
  
  For erotic massage, you can stay with the same pattern "after the flip," which seems to work better for male subjects, or you can put one giver in charge of the pelvic region and the other in charge of everything else (e.g., thighs and feet; breast massage and nipple stimulation).
  
  Get a good padded table, several large towels, some coconut oil (or any good vegetable oil), and a willing third person and you're all set. Total cost <$200.
  
  Have fun!

Combined with this very inexpensive massage table, flying games could be ridiculously immersive.

I recommend Best Massage tables on Amazon. Make sure you get one with a "Reiki endplate" that means there is an opening at each end to get your knees under when sitting. Many massage tables have an X at the ends and that is no good for Reiki. There is no need to spend more than $150 on a table..ever. I am a full time Reiki/energy healer and have been using the Best Massage tables for years.
https://www.amazon.com/BestMassage-Portable-Massage-Table-Carry/dp/B002YB0AHQ/ref=sr_1_10?keywords=best+massage&qid=1571107452&sr=8-10