(Part 3) Top products from r/tifu

Except /u/FootsieFighter's metaphor wasn't a metaphor.

A pencil sharpener that sharpens many pencils is just a pencil sharpener. Those things are made for sharpening more than one pencil (in some cases even more than one type of pencil) so sharpening multiple pencils isn't really a feat that warrants a "master" status. Keys on the other hand are manufactured for a specific corresponding lock, so if one key is capable of opening many locks it is certainly impressive.

On the subject of locks versus pencils:

A lock is supposed to have a one to one correspondence with the key that opens it, otherwise it is indeed useless. It fails at being a lock. It fails it's telos. A pencil on the other hand doesn't fail at being a pencil from getting sharpened many times, that's what pencils do. It actually fulfills its telos. The pencil isn't even analogous to a penis, one is finite in potency and the other isn't (at least from having too much sex).

So that sharpener-pencil analogy conveys nothing but what its literal meaning implies. It doesn't fit the human reproductive model. Whereas the key-lock analogy fits perfectly.

Here's how:

Male mammals are biologically wired to have as many sexual partners as possible [1], [2].
Why did I link to a book titled "Momma's Baby Daddy's Maybe?" Just to show how historically there was always inherent uncertainty in the paternity status of the males. Women give birth so their maternity isn't really questionable. Men, however, prior to DNA testing, could never with complete certainty know if the offspring was really theirs unless they were in an experimentally controlled environment prior to conception (which realistically never happens). Thus, evolutionarily, it makes sense for males to have multiple sexual partners to increase their biological fitness. In other words, a man who has many female sexual partners (key that opens many locks) is, in the absence of some other factors, biologically more fit than a man who has few female sexual partners. You can disagree with the morality of that all you want, doesn't make it less true biologically.

Now to examine the role women play in the context of human evolution:

For natural selection to work, there needs to be certain set of preconditions. One of these conditions is sexual selection (a subset of natural selection). Women are in charge of regulating this gate (or lock). Just as men are biologically wired to reproduce women are biologically wired to choose the most biologically fit male to reproduce with (since scarcity of sexual partners isn't usually an issue with females). This ensures that most of the genes in the population's gene pool are the ones that are most suitable for species continuation in that environment. In this sense, women are indeed like locks. If this lock can be opened by any key (male with ambiguous biological fitness) than it's probably a detriment to the evolution of our species, and is therefore "shitty."

TL;DR: While I agree that metaphors can be made to support virtually any viewpoint, I don't think /u/FootsieFighter's metaphor holds any ground.

There's one way to consistently make a lot of money investing over a long period of time. It has worked repeatedly for nearly a century, producing numerous billionaires. It's the only approach that enables someone outside of Wall Street to consistently beat the market and get rich (over many years).

The Intelligent Investor by Benjamin Graham
https://www.amazon.com/Intelligent-Investor-Definitive-Investing-Essentials/dp/0060555661

Security Analysis by Benjamin Graham
https://www.amazon.com/Security-Analysis-Foreword-Buffett-Editions/dp/0071592539

Margin of Safety, by Seth Klarman [pdf of book, out of print]
https://files.leopolds.com/books/Margin.of.Safety.1st.Edition.1991.Klarman.pdf

Buffett: The Making of an American Capitalist by Roger Lowenstein
https://www.amazon.com/Buffett-American-Capitalist-Roger-Lowenstein/dp/0812979273

Common Stocks and Uncommon Profits by Phil Fisher
https://www.amazon.com/Common-Stocks-Uncommon-Profits-Writings/dp/0471445509

I hope you see this just so you get the elephant ear cleaning thing that I use. I got one from my mom who works at an urgent care and the doctors there use this to clean out wax clogged ears (impacted cerumen).

Get this thing and use it in the shower with warm, not hot water. Turn your head sideways and insert the tip and spray the water which will clear out the wax safely. It has a shield on the tip that’s supposed to prevent you from going too far, but I never put it in all the way. I just go until it’s comfortably in enough to spray well.

elephant ear bottle

Unless upstairs was like 10 floors up, it really wasn't.

Maybe it wasn't feasible based on your home's layout (couldn't close doors etc), but a regular Ethernet cable can be 100m with minimal loss. And seem like Cat6 can actually be even longer, at 700ft (which is like 200m): https://www.lifewire.com/what-is-an-ethernet-cable-817548

And here's a pre-made 200ft cable that's just 30$: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07YK4T5BQ/ref=twister_B07F8HQMQC

You sound like you know a bit about this stuff. You might like this book:

http://www.amazon.com/Sleepless-Novel-Charlie-Huston/dp/0345501144/ref=sr_1_13?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1372710495&sr=1-13

I don't know exactly, but this book will make it easy for you... http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0321657292/ref=redir_mdp_mobile/175-1138342-1236566

Smoke buddy FTW my dude.

https://www.amazon.com/Diatomaceous-Earth-Food-Grade-10/dp/B00025H2PY

Buy this shit. I've had to deal with them twice. This stuff is like glass to them and it works real well where you can't burn them to death. Let it sit for a few days, then vacuum it up. Continue until you're satisfied their gone.

I'd suggest puttong throughout the area you have your couch as well. To make sure thy don't spread further into your abode.

It won't hurt you to lay on, but you can always put a sheet or something over the couh while you sleep if you don't want to lay in the powder.

No More Mister Nice Guy

I recommend Wild Swans if you want to read about Mao's time

http://www.amazon.com/Wild-Swans-Three-Daughters-China/dp/0743246985/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1422211501&sr=8-1&keywords=wild+swans

It's from the perspective of a Chinese woman whose parents were both staunch Communists, and details what they went through during the Cultural Revolution, and before.

It's really eye opening

Get a Smoke Buddy, smoke all you'd like
https://www.amazon.com/Smoke-Buddy-0159-BLU-Personal-Filter/dp/B00478UIB2/ref=sr_1_1?s=home-garden&ie=UTF8&qid=1524435264&sr=1-1&keywords=smoke+buddy

You need one of these

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Denman-D6-Shampoo-Shower-Brush/dp/B000J1AD52

http://www.amazon.com/Kingston-DataTraveler-Predator-1TB-DTHXP30/dp/B00E65QM8O

even worse...

http://www.amazon.com/Kingston-DataTraveler-Predator-1TB-DTHXP30/dp/B00E65QM8O

Or: www.amazon.com/dp/B009P16FKY

I have the same problem and my dr always used this weird thing to clean my ears, I asked if they were affordable for a regular person to buy

best 30 dollars you’ll ever spend

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Blade-Runner-Oscar-Pistorius/dp/0753540851/

Wikipedia

Genre: Science Fiction

Amazon
>... from the mind of the finest science fiction writer of them all

when i was a kid i though it was to. i learned differently when my grandmother bought me a book all about misheard lyrics.

Maybe not a friend, but it can be your ally.

The dude who cuts my hair went on and on about a shower brush he got. I ended up getting one. My bf uses it all the time on his beard and head. You could try one! This is the one he got so I also got it: Denman Be-Bop Massage Brush, Twister, Shampoo Brush https://www.amazon.com/dp/B000J1AD52/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_gJgFDbFK5AN72

I'm not sure if he's messing with you but the contacts on SIM cards are the same

The rest of the size is the plastic backing. You cut SIM cards with scissors or a SIM card cutter.

If you go to a tech that knows how to Google they can find that removing the SIM is fairly simple.

Diatomacious Earth.

https://www.amazon.com/Diatomaceous-Earth-Food-Grade-10/dp/B00025H2PY

Non-toxic, powder, edible, kills bed bugs, roaches, fleas, etc, affordable.

It's worthwhile to read The Trial, especially the part about the satanic panic of the 80's. Teachers were persecuted because 4 and 5 year olds said they'd been molested in a tunnel under the school, among other absurdities. https://www.amazon.com/Trial-History-Socrates-Simpson/dp/0375505504

1. The "scars are like criminal records" argument is Cart Before Horse logic, you get a scar from having an accident, you don't get drunk from having an accident. I believe there are laws that prevent people with a history of violence with dangerous weapons from getting those weapons.
   
   
2. The police should not be following known drunks around, and it is not a paltry fine/mandated rehab, the first offense is calculated to be $24,265 before your attorney, loss of vehicle, and other ripple effects on your life.
   
   
3. The courts have very strict limits in applying this law, and would not be able to use it to ban other products from being sold to individuals. They may institute a similar requirement for the new marijuana regulations, but that will have to be a separate matter.
   
   
4. Comparing US Courts to Nazi's is bad, but not as bad as comparing people with a criminal record to Jewish people. If you have evidence other than "the people made a law, the courts enforced it, and now we're in Nazi Germany" please present it.
   
   
5. If your BAC is over the limit you shouldn't be driving. Period. It doesn't matter if it was from last night, if your BAC is 0.08 the next morning after a night of drinking, you should not be driving. It's the same as any other chemical affect on your body, if you are "tipsy" or "buzzed" or "drunkover" you should not be driving. Seriously dude, don't get on the road, people get in accidents completely sober, why even introduce the possibility for injuring/killing yourself/others.
   
   
6. It does not affect the relatives of the person with the red-stripe, outside of maybe needing to bum a ride. This argument is getting stretched. Those arguments sound like bullshit, because they are, and have no bearing on the reality and limits of this law. I'll take your line of reasoning to it's logical conclusion: we shouldn't have laws against crime because the people who commit those crimes might get offended.
   
   
7. You are paranoid, they also didn't regulate airbags, seatbelts, or any of the thousands of safety devices we have put in place since the 60's that have saved countless lives.
   
   
8. It requires 2 DUI's and if you're driving with alcohol on your breath and they find you have a BAC above 0.08 you SHOULD NOT BE ON THE ROAD. It doesn't matter if "you're driving totally safe" because it's about more than just all the times you didn't get into a fatal accident.
   
   
9. You should really read Thinking Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman. He does a great job of showing how our ability to intuitively predict statistics is completely flawed. This is highlighted by your lack of understanding that driving drunk/buzzed means you are unlikely to be in an accident, or that if you've been in an accident while drunk driving, that you're unlikely to be in another while drunk driving.