(Part 2) Best workplace culture books according to redditors
We found 598 Reddit comments discussing the best workplace culture books. We ranked the 162 resulting products by number of redditors who mentioned them. Here are the products ranked 21-40. You can also go back to the previous section.
Here's my list of the classics:
General Computing
Computer Science
Software Development
Case Studies
Employment
Language-Specific
C
Python
C#
C++
Java
Linux Shell Scripts
Web Development
Ruby and Rails
Assembly
I'm flattered that you've mistaken me for Jesus--that is unfortunately not often the case.
I'm glad to hear I'm not the only person who has had to trudge through Hofstede. That Hofstede book was a monster to get through--but I haven't been able to look at the world the same since then.
I also like Craig Storti's 'Figuring Foreigners Out' for a more approachable book to the subject of Intercultural Communication.
Nobodies
An excerpt from "The New Yorker"
What's been the hardest for me to accept throughout all this is that the rich minority just got fucking richer again, and the poor got screwed in the process, like always.
Just like with the corporate and political corruption we read about every day, today, the cold calculating scam artist got what he wanted. The SB Champion Patriots got what they wanted. And our team, who seemed very accommodating and supportive throughout this entire process, was duped and screwed. And there will be no repercussions.
I don't care about the 5th rd pick; we signed several undrafted FA's. The 3rd is a bit harder to swallow.
But what hurts the most is that in this world, being a heartless scumbag will get you success, money, and probably superbowl rings. Whereas people who aren't total assholes, like Gruden - who probably won't press charges for wiretapping - get stabbed in the back. Psychopaths climb the ladders of our society with ease. Such is the world we live in, and today was yet another reminder. That's the hardest part for me to get over, especially with all these celebrities celebrating AB's "mastermind genius chess finesse" on his instagram posts. Mack's trade was arguably a win for everyone involved. This is only a win for AB and the Pats.
Xerox PARC invented the mouse, the GUI, Ethernet... and did nothing with it. Thank god the invited Apple over to steal everything, otherwise it might have never been used.
If you haven't read "Revolution in the Valley" or folklore.org, you should. Great story about the creation of the Mac and insight into working under Steve Jobs.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0596007191?ie=UTF8&tag=smasher02-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0596007191
I was able to find alternate shoes for my interview outfit. I don't love them as much, but they'll work--they're these, but in mauve/light pink. I like them.
Tomorrow I need to read Brave New World for book club, flip through this book for my interview, and do overall interview prep. Ugh. Since I have a lot of reading to do, I am instead watching The Great British Bake Off. So charming!
On days when I need more of a visual authority boost I pair a black blazer with plain t/tank and jeans. It works but sometimes comes over a bit more on the formal side of tech business casual.
I say you do you because honestly your outfits sound neutral/professional enough, and add this to your reading list for some practical advice on daily life in a male-dominated tech environment: https://www.amazon.com/Feminist-Fight-Club-Survival-Workplace/dp/0062439782
TL;DR: The conflict over "power users" is due to the fundamental anonymity mismatch created by a site that creates usernames, tracks user involvement but permits no user identification or community beyond 15 characters and two scores. If you care to learn more, read on. If you don't, the following will bore the shit out of you.
I've given this a lot of thought. I've been fortunate to befriend an extremely intelligent social media guru (in the academic sense, not the SEO sense) and the reading list I've gotten off of her has been illuminating as fuck. The following theory owes its creation to the following books:
You are not a gadget
Predictably Irrational
Reality is Broken
The Starfish and the Spider
Further discussion can be found here and here. I realize it's pretty goddamn rude to front-load a conversation with a bibliography and footnotes but I want to emphasize that this is not something I treat flippantly. I have never had as much influence over the behavior of the world as I feel we all do at Reddit and the behaviors we see and experience are, in my opinion, a new social ground that deserves study. Using the 10/10 rule, I believe that public forums such as Reddit are likely to become the preeminent form of communication in the future and wrapping one's head around the foibles and failings of the medium while it still remains the domain of the early adopter is an investment that will pay off in spades going forward.
First off, the statement "everybody wants to take the idols down a notch" is indisputable truth, for varying values of "everybody." I would say that messages of support are far more likely to come in via PM and that messages of disparagement are far more likely to come in via public forum. The end result is that "take the idols down a notch" is a socially-condoned behavior while "worshipping the idols" is something that will generally get you shunned. The exception is when Reddit at large is busily worshipping you - post something that Reddit loves and people saying "I love this redditor" will get upvoted. Even then, however, the number of PMs of support you get is generally 5x the number of public accolades. The prevailing culture of Reddit is very much aligned with the (apocryphal?) Japanese proverb "The nail that sticks up will be hammered down."
The reason this attitude prevails is due to the tripartite nature of Reddit and the incongruities it causes. Reddit is, at once and simultaneously,
No one place can be all three of those things without friction.
From a "news" perspective, Reddit could be compared to, say, Gizmodo. The difference is that Gizmodo is a top-down, conventional news site where a select few insiders produce content for a sea of outsiders. The boundary is obvious there - if your name is on the article, you're a for-pay employee. The criticism heaped upon Gizmodo is entirely appropriate because they're journalists. Letters to the Editor date back to the Revolutionary War. Reddit, however, has most of the same characteristics as Gizmodo, minus the editorial wall. So whereas "yell at the name you recognize" is a tradition well-served and understood in the world of journalism, in the everyone-as-editor world of Reddit "yell at the name you recognize" tends to concentrate the insults from those who contribute the least on those who are contributing the most.
From a "video game" perspective, Reddit might as well be Farmville. We see each other's scores growing and when someone else's score grows vastly faster than ours, we're likely to presume they're cheating (particularly when the rules of the game are largely secret and passed down amongst users primarily via folklore). Reddit is also one of the least-rewarding video games ever created, as there are no multicolored sprites or triumphant marches played when a comment or submission scores well. As such, the "hipsterism" of Reddit promotes attacks on those with high karma because, after all, only nerds would spend so much time on a video game that can't even hold a candle to Pac Man. Finally, scores on Reddit are highlighted prominently and are an intrinsic part of the "game" even though the scores hold absolutely no value. Reddit puts "players" in a gold-farming frame of mind without giving them anything to spend their gold on.
Reddit falls apart the most as a "social site." Unlike standard PHPBB communities, you can click on a username and learn exactly nothing about them on Reddit. You can't even see what their top contributions have been. Reddit awards users with a "trophy" for verifying an email address - which occupies the same lofty perch as producing the top daily comment or top daily post on a site with 500,000 users. Reddit is barely removed from the 100% anonymity provided by 4chan - with the exception of the "power users." The fact that we borrowed the term from Digg (where it meant something) and use it here (where it totally doesn't) only makes matters worse, particularly when combined with the poorly-understood mechanisms of Reddit's anti-spam filters. Most Redditors presume that they get a "posting too fast" warning in any given subreddit because they lack the karma to bypass the filter. When I mention it, people are usually flabbergasted that I run into the same problem, despite having a top 20 or 30 combined karma score of all time.
And it's the anonymity mismatch that causes the biggest problem, in my estimation. Ask any redditor to name 5 reddit accounts other than his own and he'll have a hard time. Of those he remembers, dollars to donuts they'll be names that he either a) sees a lot or b) really pissed him off in a flamewar at some point. The rest of it is entirely too anonymous to remember. Probably half of p-dub's comment karma comes from people upvoting him so they could say "do your homework." Probably 3/4ths of L3mm1w1nkz's comment karma comes from his signature "PS I am a shithead." Gimli_the_dwarf, despite having a lot to say and extremely insightful posts, is going to be remembered for "And my axe." This is why novelty accounts flourish on Reddit - they're easy to recognize, easy to remember, and easy to reward.
The flip-side, of course, is they're also easy to punish. The reason Randall doesn't post as xkcd any more, if I had to guess, is that as soon as people decided that xkcd wasn't indisputably funny people jumped on him. That's why so very many of the names that were prominent on this site a year ago are now gone - the opportunities for interaction are so very rare that -
Planner with 6+ years' experience, and a master's degree, chiming in.
Make sure you have some tangible skills, like GIS. Also be prepared to move anywhere in the country (or world). I.e., be as flexible as possible, because, as someone else said, planning is a bit of a niche market and there aren't a million jobs in any given locale. Get as much work experience as possible while you're still in school and can afford to work for free or close to free.
While you're at it, get a book (like this one) on how to write a resume and make it look good (and keep it to one page). Do something to stand out. The market is, in fact, flooded with job-seekers and you need to make it both easy to not throw your resume away, and easy for the hiring manager to want to give you a second look.
Another idea: if there happens to be some sort of natural disaster when you graduate and are looking, there are always going to be jobs with state and federal money assisting in the cleanup and rehabilitation. E.g., after Sandy, I saw lots of (temp) community planning jobs in NJ and NY helping with community revitalization.
One final thought. If you don't want to be flexible and know exactly where you want to work, you can, first, tailor your education towards that end. I knew a guy who did that and got his dream job right out of grad school. Second, you can move to that area and go to all the networking events and really target your applications (geographically). Accept something less than what you want initially just to have some stability and build a resume in your chosen location, and never stop looking for the next thing. Expect to change jobs a lot. Everyone else will.
"Snakes in Suits: When Psychopaths Go to Work" by Paul Babiak
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B000QUCOAS/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1
A book I really like is “What Works For Women At Work” by Joan C Williams
https://www.amazon.com/What-Works-Women-Work-Patterns-ebook/dp/B00GXA1QN6
Hey everyone! I’m seeing many questions from budding or new data scientists in the thread trying to figure out the best path ahead - How do I get started in a career in data science? What skills do I need? What should I major in?
As we all know, data science is becoming increasingly popular, yet the term is still hotly debated.
So to start us off, my view is that a data scientist is basically a statistician who can program. Data science is the art of using the latest computer science and statistical techniques to collect, analyze, visualize, and otherwise draw conclusions from data. Most of the thorny topics being discussed these days about bias, quality of data, modeling, learning, and data cleaning all come from the healthy body of statistics we've built over the last 100 years. The novelty of data science comes from a technical need to be able to handle the volume of data now available and to wrangle it from many disparate forms into a clean, usable format. Beyond that, all the other skills attributed to a data scientist - visual communication skills, good written skills, subject matter expertise - hold true for anyone doing science, from biology to anthropology.
What’s interesting to note is that the skills needed by a true “data scientist” are exceedingly rare. Using Drew Conway’s data science Venn diagram (yes, I still reference this one), one needs to have:
Hacking skills: These are programming and scripting skills, but are often not taught in universities or even in industry.
Statistical experience: Not many people are trained in formal statistics beyond simple linear regression. A good data scientist should be an expert in questions of bias, advanced modeling, and causal inference.
Machine learning: I’m going to single out machine learning chops, as not every hacker + stats person has these. It takes a special skill set to build efficient neural networks and to understand how they do/don’t work.
Substantive expertise: The data scientist may not need to be an expert in the field themselves but, if they’re not, they better learn enough of it from an expert to be able to interpret results or think creatively. At DataKind we solve this by teaming non-profits with the data scientists to bring their expertise.
The good news? With this diversity of skills needed, there are lots of pathways you can follow and no one way. For example, Drew himself was a computer science undergrad who went on to get a Ph.D. in political science. His graduate work drew him into the world of statistics and data, including machine learning concepts that inspired him to study the social networks of terrorists and do predictive analytics on voting behaviors. He also has great communication skills, picked up some basic visualization, and has strong business and management savvy from his time in government and intelligence. Other people I know have come from mathematics backgrounds and then picked up programming and computer science to be able to build more advanced models. No matter how you get there, you’ll need to build up your programming and stats skills and not lose sight of your soft skills of communication and creativity.
To learn more about the paths of data scientists, I also recommend a great book Sebastian Gutierrez, one of the moderators of /r/datascience put together called Data Scientists at Work - http://www.amazon.com/Data-Scientists-Work-Sebastian-Gutierrez/dp/1430265981
The bad news? There are lots of pathways you can follow so it can feel overwhelming to figure out how to get started.
The Internet is now littered with online courses to teach you data science. Check out Coursera first and foremost. There are also fellowships through Insight and the Data Incubator that will round out your data science training over about 12 weeks. I’m also a huge fan of John Foreman’s Data Smart for a good intro to data science algorithms and thinking if you’re more of the self-learning type. Of course the best way to learn is to do: Check out online competitions through Kaggle or DrivenData to take part in machine learning competitions. Start small and look at questions you’re genuinely interested in. Lastly, don’t underestimate the power of meeting people in person. Immerse yourself in the data science community as best you can. Attend local Meetups, check out webinars or local conferences, and keep posting questions on /r/datascience of course and you’ll soon be well on your own data science path. When you’re ready to start the job search, don’t forget that we do a monthly jobs round up over at DataKind to help you use your powers for good - check out our list for January!
No matter how you get there, enjoy the journey. Data science is a thrilling and exciting field and whether you know Linear Algebra backwards and forwards or not is not as important as rolling up your sleeves and having fun digging in wherever you’re at. Good luck!
suggested reading on this (and related) topic(s): Cultures and Organizations: Software of the Mind](http://www.amazon.com/Cultures-Organizations-Software-Mind-Third/dp/0071664181). A very interesting book/study that explores (national) culture through several dimensions, especially helpful if you work with people in/from a different culture than your own. Gender attitudes is not an explicit cultural dimension, but follows from others. (e.g the most feminist countries also seem to score high on femininity v. masculinity)
Personally, my only real experience with this sort of thing is the time I was in Zambia for round about a month. Gender inequality seemed very engrained into the culture as a whole with not many women working etc. One time in a supermarket, a guy was blatantly taking pictures of my (white) female coworkers. However, most women I met were actively working against the stereotype and inequality, two of our host's four daughters had gone to the US to go to college, one of them was well on her way to become a doctor, while the youngest was enrolling University the following year. Also, we worked with women in high positions in an organisation managed by the Reformed Church of Zambia and taught basic computer and internet skills to about twenty people from the slums, most of whom were female as well.
Revolution In the Valley: an insanely great geek coffee-table book. Well-worth picking up, even though most/all of the stories are online at folklore.org, including the one you remember.
Not exactly what you’re looking for, but the book that I believe has defined my thinking about cultures (including my own) the most was “Cultures and Organizations” by Hofstede et al. (https://www.amazon.com/Cultures-Organizations-Software-Mind-Third/dp/0071664181). It’s an academic book so it’s rather hard to read, but the premise is to fit all the world cultures into a single framework, and I believe that it delivers on that promise. All that “guards saying hi to the white guys” stuff you can pretty much get from Wikitravel (my favorite travel website), but “Cultures and Organizations” might offer a reason for why certain things have established into various parts of the world.
you're not alone.
books that have helped me: http://www.amazon.com/Somebody-Around-Insider-Secrets-Hired/dp/0312373341
Corporate Confidential: 50 Secrets Your Company Doesn't Want You to Know---and What to Do About Them by Cynthia Shapiro
Link: http://amzn.com/B003K15PC4
No one will ever tell you they have an issue with you. No one likes confrontation and they figure if you don't know the imaginary, unofficial rules of Corporate America, then you don't belong there anyway.
HR is not there for you. HR is there to keep the company from getting sued. Makes friends with someone and ask them to give you honest feedback about how you behave/come across and any insider tips on the culture at the office. It's the only way to survive.
I've never been at a job more than a couple years. Edit: mostly because I don't do politics and butt kissing and get so bored I stop doing my job.
To avoid such fuckups, checklists should be followed.
The Checklist Manifesto: How To Get Things Right
by Atul Gawande
The problem is not only that this affects men attempting to parent their kids, it affects the entire society's gender roles. Anne-Marie Slaughter wrote a great book on the topic Unfinished Business: Women, Men, Work, Family that discusses these issues. When the assumption is women are the natural caregivers, it has overwhelming effects on both women and men at work, at home, and in relationships.
Not sure I would classify it as a Business book exactly, but The Tipping Point was really good. I wasn't able to finish it because of scratched CDs, but Execution seemed like a fairly good book as well.
we have to build robust, redundant, online-to-offline-and-back networks of rapid communication via trusted networks. trust being in the meat space & heart space that exists between people, not trust based solely on some level of upvoting or amazon.com reputation system or what not. that type of crowd sourcing for importance is part of it, but cannot, should not be all of it. too open to manipulation.
befriend 3-5 online berners closely enough that you trust eachother to connect via other channels. ask each of your network to spread out that way as well. We have to become the Starfishes to thwart the Spiders in the media.
No problem! Let me know what you think of this list I pulled together:
1) Getting the easy one out of the way, plus size clothing sections and stores are common for women, but not for men. Men either shop in the regular department or, if need be, Big & Tall. Women have separate departments for sizes 12+ in most major stores, and if you Google "plus size clothing stores" you'll get all stores for women (at least I did). Even when I Googled "clothes for fat people" all the results I got were female-related. When I searched for "big and tall" I finally got results for men, though most results are for items that will still be found in the general "men's" department, not a department of their own. (Not that they should have a department of their own, just the discrepancy between how men and women are treated in this area doesn't make sense to me.)
2) The common sentiments from transgendered people who have lived as both sexes are that, firstly, men are taken more seriously than women, and, secondly, that appearance matters far more when you're a woman. To quote /r/IAMA's most recent transgender AMA:
>One thing that stands out to me is the experience of size. When I lived as a teenage girl I was constantly thinking about my weight. The world is filled with messages from family, friends, and media telling teen girls they need to lose weight and whatnot. I didn't like to admit it, but it was affecting me to some degree. Now, as a guy, I don't hear much of those messages anymore. It's not that they stopped, but I just can't hear them as much because I'm socialized as a guy now. As a guy, it's a nice thing if you're ripped but it's also no big deal if you're average or overweight. It's not considered the main thing about the man, like it is about a woman. I've been basically the same weight all my life since age 12 (120-130 lbs) but as a male I never feel bad about it.
3) According to a major survey conducted by the Center for Talent Innovation and detailed in the book "Executive Presence," senior executives listed twice as many appearance blunders committed by women than men. Additionally, women were judged more harshly. For example, a woman might be seen as lacking leadership skills if she's overweight, while a man receives the same judgment if obese.
4) Looking at media, it's not terribly uncommon to see an overweight man with a fit wife. Sometimes you'll see both the man and woman unfit. If there's an example somewhere of an overweight woman with a fit husband, I haven't seen it.
5) Similarly, males in video games are allowed to be young, old, fat, thin, ginormous, etc. Women are predominantly fit and busty. The character design for Overwatch is a good example of this. Look at the wide range of male body types! The women? All fit and busty. (For anyone seeking to give me the "but it's made for men!" line; I've heard it. Doesn't change how things are.)
--------
Despite me feeling the above are solid examples, I want to give you a few peer reviewed studies to avoid feeling like I'm giving you a list of anecdotes:
6) Results showed that females are more concerned than males about eating, body weight, and physical appearance and have lower appearance self-esteem. More important, these gender differences are generally apparent at all ages.
7) Relationships between body surveillance, body shame, and body esteem were stronger for women than for men. Women had higher surveillance,body shame, and actual/ideal weight discrepancy, and lower body esteem than did men. Multiple regression analysis found that gender differences in body esteem were no longer significant when OBC was entered into the equation, supporting feminist theory about women's body experience.
8) tldr: Study measures various factors influencing career success, one of the conclusions is that "poor in physical appearance" is a damning factor specifically for women.
9) Our annual global investment in appearance totals close to $200 billion. Many individuals experience stigma, discrimination, and related difficulties, such as eating disorders, depression, and risky dieting and cosmetic procedures. Women bear a vastly disproportionate share of these costs, in part because they face standards more exacting than those for men, and pay greater penalties for falling short.
10) This study both discusses how obese people make less than non-obese people, but also found that overweight women are more likely to have a low-paying job than overweight men.
11) Women were at greater risk for weight/height discrimination than men, especially women with a BMI of 30–35 who were three times more likely to report weight/height discrimination compared to male peers of a similar weight.
cough http://www.amazon.com/Data-Scientists-Work-Sebastian-Gutierrez/dp/1430265981 cough
Data Scientists at Work (http://www.amazon.com/Data-Scientists-Work-Sebastian-Gutierrez/dp/1430265981) it's an interview series with the following data scientists and 1 investor in data companies.
Note: I wrote it so I'm a bit biased when I say you'll love it because it's the greatest book ever written by me. :)
Also - I did an AMA about it that you might find interesting: https://www.reddit.com/r/datascience/comments/2oyzvu/i_wrote_data_scientists_at_workama/
Definitely. I recommend the Checklist Manifesto. Surgeons, Astronauts, & Scientists are all fallible and get things wrong. Creating your own checklists can help.
Cheesy but potentially useful - much has been written about P&G's culture as a model for mgt in general as well as for other consumer goods cos, so it's common to find people in the industry constantly referencing P&G methods as dogma (which is often laughable from the perspective of an analyst, but good to know.) A few reads:
​
https://www.amazon.com/Playing-Win-Strategy-Really-Works/dp/142218739X/ref=sr_1_2?keywords=procter+gamble+book&qid=1559027196&s=gateway&sr=8-2
​
https://www.amazon.com/When-Core-Values-Are-Strategic/dp/0132905337/ref=sr_1_7?keywords=procter+gamble+case+studies&qid=1559027619&s=gateway&sr=8-7
​
http://globadvantage.ipleiria.pt/files/2009/07/working_paper-33_globadvantage.pdf
http://www.kalzumeus.com/2012/01/23/salary-negotiation/ is my go to tactic for negotiating, although it's geared specifically for software jobs. It's definitely helped me out immensely with salary negotiation, especially since that's a trickier field for women. We have to be much more careful in our wording, lest is be mistaken for being "aggressive".
I also found that What Works for Women at Work by Joan Williams to be an incredibly helpful guide to navigating negotiation and a career.
Jef Raskin developed the initial concept for the Mac. Later he left the team and Jobs took over.
Source: http://www.amazon.com/Revolution-Valley-Paperback-Insanely-Great/dp/0596007191
I loved All The Single Ladies by Rebecca Traister, Bad Feminist by Roxane Gray and Men Explain Things To Me by Rebecca Solnit.
I just purchased Feminist Fight Club by Jessica Bennett but haven't had the chance to read it yet.
Check out Hello, Startup by Yevgeniy Brikman
Indeed an interesting article - a feminist starting to have doubts, condescending as they may be. Thanks for bringing it to our attention!
For those interested:
Slaughter's original complaint:
https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2012/07/why-women-still-cant-have-it-all/309020/
Gottlieb's Response:
https://www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2012/06/why-theres-no-such-thing-as-having-it-all-and-there-never-will-be/258928/
Gottlieb's Case for "Settling":
https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2008/03/marry-him/306651/
Slaughter's Book:
https://www.amazon.com/Unfinished-Business-Women-Work-Family/dp/0812984978
Gottlieb's Book:
https://www.amazon.com/Marry-Him-Case-Settling-Enough/dp/045123216X
Here's McRaven (the former head of JSOC) thesus
BIG PDF WARNING
http://www.dtic.mil/cgi-bin/GetTRDoc?AD=ADA493691
Here's his book:
http://www.amazon.com/Spec-Ops-Studies-Operations-Practice/dp/0891416005
Might want to checkout the ranger handbook too:
http://www.fas.org/irp/doddir/army/ranger.pdf
These books are good too:
http://www.amazon.com/The-Accidental-Guerrilla-Fighting-Small/dp/0195368347/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1345805419&sr=8-1&keywords=accidental+gorilla
http://www.amazon.com/Starfish-Spider-Unstoppable-Leaderless-Organizations/dp/1591841836/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1345805440&sr=1-1&keywords=starfish+and+the+spider
> Should we separate OKRs and Performance Reviews?
Absolutely, that's a foundational premise of OKRs. You should read the book Measure What Matters, it explains what OKRs are, how they came to be and how to approach using them in your organizations.
To the point the other poster made, you absolutely should be setting "aspirational" OKRs, that's another foundational premise of OKRs. You should have stretch OKRs and you should be targeting ~70% completion. OKRs are not a task list and they are not a performance evaluation. If you're hitting 100% of your OKRs you're setting them too conservatively. Again this the process.
If anyone is really interested in implementing OKRs you really should spend some time understanding them. Obviously it's going to be up to individual leaders to decide how best to implement them, whether you want stretch OKRs, etc. but I'm going to use a "no true scottsman" here. OKRs are being pretty widely adopted in progressive orgs these days and it's pretty well documented how they work, you're either doing OKRs or you're not regardless of what you want to call the process.
Radical Candor: How to Get What You Want by Saying What You Mean https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1509845380/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_NMdFDbVQJ7S4B
Radical Candor: we had Kim Scott speak at our company offsite and she was very inspiring. Its not bullshit she lives and breathes this stuff and it really works (selectively)
The Checklist Manifesto: How to Get Things Right. Atul Gawande https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1846683149/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_0NdFDb66SV631
Checklists: will change all your workflows and delivery paradigm.
As someone in the thread on the BBC story pointed out, this was orchestrated deliberately by the author of a book about people being "Jobsworths", Andre Spicer, author of The Stupidity Paradox: The Power and Pitfalls of Functional Stupidity.
Coincidence? Definitely not.
Except for Williams this wasn't a single incident of being treated, in her view and the view of many watching, unfairly. That is the problem with systemic sexism. All the little pushes (the catsuit, the snickers about her rocking body, the unequal pay) are always with you, even if you have managed to push them way down. When something like this happens, outside observers view it as an isolated incident, to be judged solely by the facts of that moment with benefit of the doubt being given to the USTA. But to her, I bet it was another small incident that piles up evidence on the mountain of small inequities over the years. I'm a woman, a few years older than Sabrina Williams. And in my experience, the benefit of the doubt should be with women who speak up about unfair treatment. Because unequal treatment of men and women in workplaces is the norm, not the exception.
I don't have statistical data on what this particular umpire usually rules, but there are oceans of statistics about the implicit biases that women face in the workplace, particularly women of color. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00GXA1QN6/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1 has a great summary of research up to a few years ago.
Sorry for the delay. Whatever you want to call them, trolls, bullies, con-artists, terrorists, etc, people with aggression issues make up at least 10% of the population.
Wikipedia: Warrior Gene
http://saferelationshipsmagazine.com
bullyonline.org
Love Fraud
neurologicalcorrelates.com
psychopathfree.com
C. Nathan DeWall, Ph.D., University of Kentucky Social Psychology Lab
Director
Books:
Snakes in Suits, Paul Babiak & Robert D. Hare
Without Conscience, Robert D. Hare
The Sociopath Next Door, Martha Stout
Just Like His Father, Liane Leedom
edit: fixed link
>It takes vision, planning, and an ability to motivate others.
That's a load of pablum.You're cheerleading the old tired heroic manager fallacy from ...the 1990s?
In any organization, management invariably instead follows The Gervais Principal, and the main factor that dissuades these entryists from taking over our organizations is our ritual requirements.
What you are saying is, "Why can't Freemasonry be more like the Lions Club?" as if that's some great model of success. The Lions Club was created by freemasons who didn't care for all the rituals and esoterics. When you take away ritual and esoterics from Freemasonry, the Lions Club is exactly what you end up with.
Everyone wants to attack and remove the ritualists. With the Lions Club, they succeeded. I guess that makes The Lions Club a two legged stool?
People who don't want to be transformed through the process of learning our moral lessons in detail can take on tasks and lead committees, but they should never be placed with the responsibility of a pedestal chair. They fail to understand freemasonry, and can only lead us in a toxic direction away from the light.
This piece of garbage. I purchased all the volumes on the comixology app. What sucks is, while it was a world warping story, it was still canon(as far as I know).
This book could prove interesting : https://www.amazon.com/Feminist-Fight-Club-Survival-Workplace/dp/0062439782
I haven't read the book yet but it sounds useful. Sexism can be so subtle in a male dominated workplace that it can make one crazy. Men often say they respect good ideas period but when an idea you said an hour ago suddenly comes out of a man's mouth and it is then lauded you think, "Huh. Maybe this sexism thing isn't over."
> "im willing to make sure you lose"
That's actually a good encapsulation of what Russians call a strong man. Some cultural studies using game theory found that Russians were one of a small group of cultures where they were willing to harm their own self interest just to spite someone who wronged them. Most the other countries with similar results were in the Persian Gulf. It was in this book: https://www.amazon.com/Cultures-Organizations-Software-Mind-Third/dp/0071664181
> Paul's Startup Guide
Wery good idea,
If you need help with content for the "tech side" I cannot recommend enough reading, or at least reading the summary of: hello startup.
I was interested too so I googled and this is what I found:
https://www.theguardian.com/profile/andre-spicer
> André Spicer is professor of organisational behaviour at the Cass Business School at City University London. He is author of The Stupidity Paradox.
https://www.amazon.com/Stupidity-Paradox-Power-Pitfalls-Functional/dp/1781255415
This is a decent book that explains the ethereal and concrete characteristics of "executive presence." It might help.
This is a perfectly reasonable response. I just think our reasoning is heavily differentiated when it comes to bodily autonomy. If a fetus can not survive outside the body of the mother, it is not viable as human life.
The violinist essay to me has put it best in terms of an ethical stance. I would not be in favor of abortion after a time which a fetus could be viable (5 months). Even before that begins to be a bit too far along for me personally. But, there are far too many cases and contexts for any one person to be the arbiter of what is right ethically in each of those cases.
The young woman I knew, I had to counsel through the process, healing, and trauma. If she’d had the child, she would have lost her job as a bartender (yes, I know this is supposedly illegal, but try living in the real world), had few skills to recommend additional employment as she only had an associate’s degree, and would have suffered even more emotionally as a result of having a child she had to give away rather than raise - as a motherless child herself.
In the case of my friend’s miscarriage, the fetus was technically still alive. It was no longer viable for my friend to carry the pregnancy due to the uterine tear, and the fetus was largely not viable / the pregnancy could not continue. So by your standard of care, it would have been an abortion.
I think as a society we tend to underrate women’s pain and autonomy, and we rely on women’s self-sacrifice for care work. I think this colors the lens through which people often view early pregnancy, and there is a systematic bias against women, assuming they should have to perform care / host labor in order to create new life. (Some interesting if tangential work written by Anne-Marie Slaughter and Soraya Chemaly in this regard!)
I simply don’t subscribe to these ethics that treat women as second class humans. And I was raised Catholic. (Read a few Elaine Pagels books and got a degree in religion to undo that).
My arguments are not to try to devalue life. I think most women who become pregnant and don’t wish to be struggle tremendously if they have to terminate. I know I would. But I also think society should look to the care of the woman, financially and emotionally, before the care of potential offspring. We are so quick in American culture to ask women to create children, and then we ask provide no assistance once the child is born. We assume a woman will provide care. That this is what they are for.
In many other cultures, even ones I find sexist in nature, women are given a great deal more care after the birth of the child. In Arab cultures, other women come over and take the child off the mother’s hands so she can rest - for days or weeks at a time. They cook, care for the baby, let the Mother sleep. This example starts to become tangential to my main argument, but I think it shows a real difference in how American culture approaches pregnancy and motherhood. You just have the child, we can’t help you after. It is sexist on its face.
Not the best week in terms of raw performance, but a very good week in terms of re-assessing where I'm at and reconnecting with goals. That process seems to recur every 4-5 months or so.
**BODY**
Lifting: After posting last week about leaving my personal trainer, I switched back to 5x5 to explore lifting heavy again.
Despite lifting VERY light for the past 6 months or so, ego still flares up when deciding what weight to put on the bar. I de-loaded to half of where I left off with 5x5 (my PR continued to go up for a few months after that. After so long of not lifting heavy I wanted to build in A LOT of room to build back up.
So, starting quite low in order to build back up and focus on maintaining form. Fun so far; I much prefer 5x5 in general because the workouts are shorter/more to the point.
After some recommendation I've been adding in pull ups and curls to the workouts as well, just super setting between the two after finishing.
Diet: had a few days where I ate off plan this week. One was on a date night with the wife - ordered my first ever Baked Alaska and GOOD LORD, I REGRET NOTHING - FUCK
Memorial Day I had a plan in place for a cookout and did not follow it. Lame.
Doctor: Finally going to see a doctor after many years away. New doc, had first appointment this morning. Liked him, young but very thorough. Fit as well.
My goal is to go back over all my cardiologist data from 6 years ago and reassess my atrial fibrilation. Once that's done, going to get a very thorough heart check up (heart attacks are very common on both mom and dad's side) and just make that a regular thing.
**MINDSET**
I would say slightly weaker than last few weeks.
Noticed myself being bothered more by sexual rejections, not wanting to initiate, etc. Nowhere near as strong as it was, and I'm more aware of it, but I've lost a bit of the OI I was enjoying.
Things are bad ----\> I give up, develop OI -----\> things improve ------\> I get re-attached ------\> lose OI ------\> things are bad
\^\^\^ That's the cycle right there. It's getting less intense over time, though.
**RELATIONSHIPS**
Sex twice this week. I'm doing more initiating during the day, but not any more or less successful than initiating in bed.
I've been thinking about our sex life; I've certainly gotten it to a better place than I ever thought possible (1-2 a week on average). But of course, now my goals have improved.
I'd like to be rejected much less, but I can't force attraction and have a lot of room to grow. I can keep working on that myself.
Something I've largely ignored is my own sexual performance/leadership. I've never had trouble giving my wife orgasms (classic nice guy behavior, "she has to cum!"), so it never bothered me much.
But I definitely rely on a very small collection of positions/techniques, etc. My wife is also very closed off about what she likes, sexually, so there's nothing coming from her. I like to be more dominant in bed, but my wife has not been terribly open to that outside of a small number of instances (doesn't like being told what to do, etc).
Outside of the attraction question, it's up to me to lead the relationship here. I also think I could stand to broaden my repertoire; I can settle into a rut unless I'm pushed.
I have a couple books/etc on sex saved to the HD that I never really explored; think it's a good time to look into that stuff. SGM and a few others.
If I want more variety in our sex life - which I do - I have to create that variety.
**BUSINESS**
Starting a new side biz, which is always fun - that's the exciting part.
Also joining a high level systems training with someone who owns several businesses but doesn't work in any of them. Going to increasingly remove myself from my current business while building side incomes.
**READING**
Measuring what matters
https://www.amazon.com/Measure-What-Matters-Google-Foundation/dp/0525536221
All about OKRs. Very interested in using this in my businesses (and in personal life)
Some Enneagram books - I find the enneagram pretty insightful. Don't really believe in "personality types," but I've gained some insight from this system. I'm a 9, my wife is a 6 - want to get a bit deeper into understanding how she copes with stress/problems.
Congrats on your promotion!
You might want to check out this book called “Executive Presence.” (Here’s the link on Amazon.) It focuses a lot on helping those who may not have the qualities or appearance of stereotypical exec exude the gravitas and confidence of a capable leader. Hopefully it’ll help you "establish yourself as The Boss.”
And actually, the company I work for has a blog with some posts written for new project managers that covers the basics. There’s a glossary of project management terms, an overview of common methodologies, a guide to project risk, and an introduction to using Gantt charts. I hope you find the information useful, and good luck!
I can think of at least three great business books in helping concentration. From the technical, the medium ground and the big picture; in order: Getting Things Done by David Allen, FOCUS by Stephen Covey, and Execution - The Discipline of Getting Things Done by Larry Bossidy and Ram Charan.
Or buy Venkatesh Rao’s Gervais Principle on Kindle.
Found via Geeks, MOPs, and sociopaths in subculture evolution.
http://www.amazon.com/Nobodies-Modern-American-Global-Economy/dp/0812971841
Many [guest foreign workers] (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guest_worker_program) are scammed into paying fees to join these work force programs, often they take loans from unsavory people at high interest fees. When they arrive here in the US for agricultural work(or in micronesia for garment factory work, or saudi arabia for construction labor work). In many cases their passports are then taken from them and they are held captive in their bunkhouses when not working. Theyllearn their room and board plus miscellaneous fees, and interest on any loans to cover these fees, exceed their wages. They are like slaves, except technically more profitable as slaves do not go into greater debt over time. Those who labor to free themselves from debt are often more productive and self-proficient than a slave that is literally owned.
Sex slavery is pretty much the above, the profession may have been the victims choice, it might not have, but they are not free to go and do not live in humane conditions.
We know what companies use varying degrees of unethical labor to make their products. But how many of us actually refuse to purchase or use them?
To reduce sex slavery, it would probably best best to legalize and regulate prostitution to reduce the profitability of black market/inhumane prostitution.
Modern slavery is indeed alive and well in the west. It just is difficult to track and prosecute, especially with how we allow corporations to distance themselves from the culpability of corporations who supply their raw materials use slave labor. Nobodies is a good introductory book on the subject
The Fable universe might have a decent chance against it, since they are fables brought to life in the human world.
Certain Fables can control their own narrative to some degree, and in one of their crossover comics with The Literals (in The Great Fables Crossover), the Big Bad Wolf killed some of the popular writing genres...while in a little girl's body. Then they hatched a new universe out of an egg and trapped the writer of their new universe in it to write to his heart's content.
https://www.amazon.com/Playing-Win-Strategy-Really-Works/dp/142218739X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1521012147&sr=8-1&keywords=Playing+to+win%3A+how+strategy+really+works&dpID=51tdkEK2iuL&preST=_SY291_BO1,204,203,200_QL40_&dpSrc=srch
Read The Starfish and the Spider. (or at least the summary: http://www.amazon.com/The-Starfish-Spider-Unstoppable-Organizations/dp/1591841836) It will likely explain what ISIS' strategy is. This is a far more tricky situation for developed countries than, "let's just use our more advanced technology to extinct them all!"
"The powers" really need to take time tore recognize what they're dealing with or it may just end up like another Vietnam.
You can say "let's table this for now" and even walk away if they won't drop it. You can say "I can talk about it more later but I'm done talking about this right now." They may not take it well the first (few) times. And do keep your promises if you give them a specific time such as "tomorrow" or 'in an hour" etc.
But you have the right to control your own emotions. You don't have to ride the emotions as high as they want you to or even at all.
Sounds like you are dealing with a bully. Bullies often back down when confronted directly. "Mike, I'm a grown man, when I say I don't want to talk about something I mean it." And just look at him. I have used techniques like this on people at work. Sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't. Completely depends on the personality of the individual you're dealing with.
When they don't work, I try to rope in someone else who knows them and may have more experience and skill than I do in terms of knowing them and how to work with them. They might have some good suggestions. It's hard when someone knows how to push your buttons and they seem pretty immune to whatever we come up with. So feel around and also observe how they are interacting with others. When do they back down? What are other people doing that makes the bully keep his distance or otherwise be more reserved than they are with you.
But that might be a direct conversation to have with them. To set guidelines. The approach might vary depending on whether this person a boss vs a friend or family member. There's a book called Difficult Conversations that gives techniques for defusing intense conversations at work and home.
You have to use your own judgement on what direction to take with them. When you pick one, practice it in the mirror a few times until you believe yourself when you say it. Be stern but calm. Like you're just saying "this is how it is" and that's that. If they become crass or make funny faces just be as cool as you can. Then go for a walk. Don't sit and stew. Let yourself get up and move around a bit. It's normal to get worked up after a conversation like that. Just take care of yourself. Breathe through the abdomen, get up and stretch. Remind yourself it's all just words.
A book on my list I haven't gotten to yet is called The Asshole Survival Guide. I think I'll have to read it next because this is a big concern for a lot of people, myself included! They say every company has at least one.
Hang in there and know you are not alone in trying to figure it out!
lol this is the best comparison i have ever read .d
Do you mean this book?
If yes, this discussion is over because we are getting to a point were it's about basic principles. Furthermore your statement "Go read Playing to win" sounds like you didn't really reflect that book because then you wouldn't (most likely) recommend it without any confinements (is this the right word in this context?).
I won't answer back now because I'm tired of it. Thanks for at least trying to make a qualified comment.
I have found that This Book explains a lot about the hiring process and the traps you may fall into to knock yourself out of the running.
http://www.amazon.com/Data-Scientists-Work-Sebastian-Gutierrez/dp/1430265981/
Happy Birthday to /u/nahcabmA and /u/LadyAmpersand!
Here is something I know that we'd like together Elvira pop
Fables Vol. 13
The Legacy of Luther Strode Volume 3
also Do you have any plans for today?
I always give this book recommendation, but honestly it helped me sooooo much. I got my most recent job with the advice from this book (one that I thought I had absolutely no chance of getting) and it has some great tips in there. The hard copy is a bit pricey, but if you have a kindle or somewhere to read kindle books, that one's not so bad.
Best of luck!
> It does not change the fact that a child can indeed understand what you and most Christians cannot. If the truth offends you, then go ahead and report me. I make no apologies for the way Jesus taught as they are His words, not mine. Many hated Him for it cause He was always very blunt and never minced words, especially with the religious leaders of the day.
I did report you. And I am close to blocking you. This is your last chance.
Your attitude of "You just have to get used to me being blunt" is asshole behavior. It's not my job to get used to you being "blunt". It's your job to be civil. You might find this book useful: https://www.amazon.com/Asshole-Survival-Guide-People-Treat-ebook/dp/B01MU0FL7M/
Short answer: I don't have any assholes in my life, and what you're saying isn't special enough to make an exception for you.
And last, the "truth" does not offend me at all. It's your demeaning lies that I find insulting and I won't put up with it. If you want me to continue talking to you, then you must be civil. Period.
> Does Christ change?
Yes. His ministry (salvation) was originally just for the Jews, then he changed and said it was for the gentiles, too.
> It comes down to whether or not you believe Paul was inspired by the Holy Spirit.
Yes, most "Christians" think Paul is special enough to annul God's Law and create his own gospel based off of his own hidden mystery. I have never seen a justification for this retcon of Jesus's ministry. Paul himself couldn't keep his story straight and there were no witnesses to what he experienced. Jesus did warn about false prophets, "wolves in sheep's clothing". Maybe that's why he said many would try, but few would get in. Are you sure that Paul wasn't sent by Satan to pervert Jesus's message?
https://jesuswordsonly.com/
> Here you go
That does not say "miracles will cease", it says, "on these two laws hang all the laws of the prophets" (and Jesus said those laws still stand, by the way, since they are God's Law). Do you have better evidence than this? I think it's time for you to abandon your claim that "the Bible says that miracles will cease".
> You fall into the same literal-ism trap so called believers do.
How do you know that "literalism" is wrong? (Spoiler: because the Bible is NOT the Word of God.)
> I said it once and I'll say it again. The Apostles and disciples did indeed do the physical signs and works for a while, until they realized that they were to do "greater works" as Jesus said they would do
You have no support for this claim.
> I think everyone is or was delusional at one time or another. I know I sure was delusional not that long ago. However, it is the intention of God that most are to be delusional for a time.
You're not answering my question. Do you think Wiccans are delusional when they say that "there is a God and a Goddess, and magic is real"? Do you think that Scientologists are delusional when they say, "Once you are clear from body thetans, then you will gain control over physical matter"?
> I actually agree, but this leaves out the when of how "the many" will be saved after "the few" are saved.
So I guess what you believe isn't really that important if you're going to be saved in the end. You could believe that Jesus was female and we are redeemed by John the Baptist being beheaded and you could still be saved. Or you could be a Mormon, or a Wiccan, or a Scientologist and never accept Jesus, and you'd still be saved. What's the point of believing anything?
https://www.amazon.com/Execution-Discipline-Getting-Things-Done/dp/0609610570
Nice book on this topic for the curious, The Gervais Principle .
The issues you are concerned about are not limited to places like Saipan and Guam. They are widespread throughout the U.S. and elsewhere in the world, just more prevalent and more visible in some places than in others. For just one treatment, see John Bowe's Nobodies. Mr. Bowe does call it "slave labor" but does not make the mistake of calling it slavery. And the worst things he describes took place in the southern United States, not the CNMI.
N.B. I cite Mr. Bowe despite the fact his book contains numerous inaccuracies, occasionally exaggerates, and is at least sometimes sloppy in its reporting of events. I can say this with confidence because I have personal knowledge of some of the the people, things, and events he discusses.
Calling it slavery is not helpful. The word is highly pejorative and both imprecise and inaccurate. You are taring an entire jurisdiction and the people who live there solely for the political shock value, to stir contempt for the islands and indignation against the islanders who run the place among people who otherwise are largely ignorant of the reality of the place.
I'm sure we can think of lots of examples of that sort of practice and agree that it is neither honorable nor worthy of emulation. Take a look at those videos again. Do you see anyone there calling it "slavery"? Those are people from all parts of the community united in pursuit of justice. People for whom the NMI is home and who live and experience the reality of the CNMI daily. Around 5,000 people participated in the Unity March. And Tina Sablan is an indigenous Chamorro in the mold of Bernie Sanders.
Rather than furthering social justice, calling it "slavery" triggers ego defensiveness and denial among the powers-that-be and significant segments of the voting population, causing them to dig in, policy and practices to become more rigid, and new legislation to be more draconian. Credit the reality rather than inflating the bogeyman. Just my friendly advice.
Maybe the dad should have got a license first, instead of hiding behind his kid when he got fined for breaking trading regulations which he surely knew existed, especially when he's written a book on this sort of thing
Having a kid with you doesn't excuse you from the law (yes, of course it was he who got the fine, not his daughter)