Reddit reviews Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white)

Honestly unless you're

1. Showering after
   
   
2. Using wet wipes
   
   
3. Using a bidet
   
   No amount of scrubbing at your asshole with dry paper is going to get it super clean.
   
   After an hour or so of just moving around/body heat/sweat/etc, anyone who goes down on you WILL get some butt B.O.
   
   People really should plunk down the $35 for a bidet and stop shitting like barbarians.
   
   If you spill salsa on shag carpeting, do you scrub at it with paper towels or do you get some kind of water in the mix?

For real though, bidets are the truth and seriously neither expensive nor hard to install.

I’m sitting on mine right now after taking a heavenly coffee poop and am reveling in my clean butthole.

If you want to live like a caveman smearing your feces further with an elevated soft paper towel, be my guest though.

Edit: Best wishes, Q. May you grab your nuts at many refs in your next chapter.

Edit 2: here’s a model similar to the one I have:
Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_GaF4BbHZXSN67

I may your buttholes ever be clean!

Best purchase ever.
https://smile.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_5?crid=2LU7X2J1I4RCZ&keywords=bidet&qid=1550883328&refinements=p_85%3A2470955011&rnid=2470954011&rps=1&s=gateway&sprefix=bid%2Caps%2C159&sr=8-5

If you can turn a wrench and tape some threads, a bidet will change your life. Never again will you make a thousand smearing wipes that still result in skidmarks. You just pat dry and walk away clean.

The only problem is that you'll never want to poop away from home again.

Don't forget the energy costs of manufacture and transportation. It takes 17.3 terawatts of energy to manufacture and transport toilet paper per year. That's a huge carbon footprint.

If you're concerned about the ecological impact of TP, I highly recommend a bidet attachment for your toilet like this:

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1541959341&sr=8-3&keywords=bidet+attachment+for+toilet&dpID=419LXSZM6YL&preST=_SX300_QL70_&dpSrc=srch

You will use significantly less toilet paper, maybe even eschewing it entirely.

$35 on Amazon and it took me like 20 minutes to install.

Luxe Brand:

https://smile.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=pd_bxgy_201_img_3?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=B00A0RHSJO&pd_rd_r=7b9644a3-2f08-11e9-910d-c707fb6d7b72&pd_rd_w=A6cuN&pd_rd_wg=sDg4s&pf_rd_p=6725dbd6-9917-451d-beba-16af7874e407&pf_rd_r=PHKRPCWHY4DRZ0P4454D&psc=1&refRID=PHKRPCWHY4DRZ0P4454D

It's like being kissed by an angel after eating cool mint 5gum

> <$300

My dude, you can get them For $35 nowadays.
Best $40 I've ever spent.

I have one of these. Like 10 minutes to attach it to your toilet and it's smooth sailing!

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_4?gclid=CjwKCAjwk93rBRBLEiwAcMapUdkYF0lPMT7x8SmGqYoXuAjMaEkpmkX1u1sele4ePNpOaB_SuaBDYhoCQakQAvD_BwE&hvadid=241653825521&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9010019&hvnetw=g&hvpos=1t1&hvqmt=e&hvrand=1359111235532572353&hvtargid=aud-647846986441%3Akwd-16370331&hydadcr=26610_9892136&keywords=bidet&qid=1568143028&s=gateway&sr=8-4

idk if it's one of the better ones, but this is the one I have, and it works great:

https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B00A0RMQ1E/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o00__o00_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

There's also a cheaper ($35) version that looks to be almost the same (I can't remember now why I got the $50 one):

https://smile.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO?ref_=bl_dp_s_web_5456991011

I actually bought it a few years back after I saw it linked in a random Reddit thread. Definitely the best thing Reddit has done for my life.

Yes. One of the attachment ones, not a separate unit.

I have one on each of the toilets in my home. They're only $35 people!

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1526312435&sr=8-2&keywords=luxe+bidet

Get a bidet. Changed my life. https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1536781811&sr=8-3&keywords=bidet

Live your dream.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apap_cqd9zyM2CgOVU

Don't use those things regularly, they dry out the skin and make things worse in the long run. Also don't flush them despite the labeling, they don't break up that easily and can clog your plumbing. Speaking from personal experience on both points :|

Instead buy a cheap bidet attachment for your toilet. I have this one and it took about 15 minutes to install.

Get yourself a bidet. Solves the I've-used-so-much-paper-I'm-bleeding thing.

Get a bidet best $40 purchase ever.

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_4?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1504204134&sr=1-4&keywords=bidet

Just goes on under the toilet seat and you hook it up to your water. Pretty simple. This is the one I own and it's fantastic 10/10 clean butt hole.

Do it up real nice for some quality poop time. Get a $40 washlet/bidet kit from Amazon, a squatty potty, poo~pourri...hell, spring for some ambient string lights and a little zen water fountain.

Happy Black Friday, the Luxe Bidet is $25 today.

They are super nice. I just bought a cheep one a year ago and i'm SOOOO glad I did.

But yes, you want TP after you bidet, but just like 2 squares to dry.... But if you dont have any tp, it's just slightly annoying to have a completely clean but slightly damp tush. Annoying vs unlivable.

If you're curious This is the one I suggest. It's $35. I did a lot of research and this one is well reviewed for the price. Installation is about 10 min, you have to unscrew the hose for the toilet, screw it back on, then take of the toilet seat, and put it back on. $35 is throw away money for most people. And you'll save loads on TP so it'll pay for it's self easy. And of course if you ever get the burning shits, you'll be blessing my name.

Seriously, just do it.

Skip all of that baby wipes nonsense and join the bidet masterrace. http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00A0RHSJO/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o01_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Get a bidet!
Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_hzPcBb5V6VRBK

Try a bidet attachment for your existing toilet.

example.

No dude wipe fatbergs. No blowout. I don't remember the last time I had to buy toilet paper.

Things to discuss:

• Shopping experience (there's weirdly a lot of styles to choose from)
  
• Installation experience
  
• User experience
  
• Value
  
• Cleaning

OMG, only $35, though I recommend the $48 upgrade if you're a lady.
The hype is all true, IT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE

I got a bidet. Changed my life, no exaggeration. Wipe first for the big stuff, then use bidet fully, then wipe again one time to get the water off. My toilet paper usage is way down, and my butthole is never agitated and sore.

I also take soluble fiber pills to make it be normal coming out. It's no big deal to me like it is to you. Taking 3-6 of them a day is way easier than trying to incorporate some traditional food into my diet. The fact that it's soluble is fine. There is a definite difference in the solidness due to the fiber pills.

Edit: added a link to the bidet I got.

Just buy a bidet

Not entirely necessary before you move in, but installing a bidet is fairly easy, and once you start using it, you will never want to poop anywhere else. I'd recommend something along the lines of this:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_1

Or, if warm water is something you want, upgrading to the 320 model isn't that much more.

I have four of these in my house. No plumbing experience necessary and they hook into the existing toilet supply without getting additional hookups for hot water or electric.

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO


I love these and so do most guests that try them out.

nice ad, but if you want a nice bidet, you don't need to spend $69 on one. i've used this one for years and it's absolutely perfect.

Attachable bidets are a good alternative.

Close, California. Bidet made in China.

http://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Elite/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1412111458&sr=8-1&keywords=neo+120

I actually did a review of it after the company sent me a 2nd one (to review) but fuck if I can find it amongst the other 678 reviews.

Dude don't wait to redo the bathroom, get a bidet attachment for your existing toilet.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_hCQ2DbJT4BGK7

$35 an Amazon for a Luxe Bidet Neo 120. I bought three of these (actually two of the 180s, and one 185), one for each bathroom and couldn't be happier. The higher models offer dual sprayers (one sprays further forward), and different controls. Taps into the clean water line going to the tank so it is super easy to install. I recommend 1000%.

You need a bidet attachment.

bidets are $35 on amazon, and they attach directly onto your toilet in a roughtly 5-minute installation. No idea what you mean when you're saying "there's no space really". If there's space for your ass-cheeks, there's space for a bidet.

Every time someone brings up bidets on reddit, I always see some sort of disclaimer that could turn people off or confuse people about them (e.g. the water is too cold, they're too expensive, etc.)

The fact of the matter is that they're $35 on Amazon (here's the one I have), incredibly easy to install, shoot out room-temperature water, save you long-term on TP costs, etc. I have no idea why every house doesn't have one these days.

If this is something you're really concerned about, you could invest in a very affordable bidet seat for your toilet

This will spray and help clean your ass a lot more than using TP. These are very common in Asia and formal bidets are found throughout Europe. Feels good, cleans good!

You're about to owe me a huge favor. The best thing I have purchased in the last 5 years is this (I bought a house last year and that doesn't compare with net happiness vs cost) :

http://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1420580324&sr=8-5&keywords=bidet

This $50 thing CHANGED MY LIFE. It is AMAZING. It's a "shitty" conversation to have with your GF. It's like 5 minutes of awkwardness for a lifetime of a clean bottom. No wiping, almost no toilet paper, no remnants, it's faster, it's healthier.

We installed this bidet from amazon in every bathroom. It’s under $40 US and easy to install. I’m thinking of upgrading to a Toto washlet in our master bath. Visited Japan and the warm seat and water is nice.

Only peasants use toilet paper, nobles use bidet. Be one of us OP.

I get my toilet paper from Amazon as well, but I also got a $25 bidet from Amazon and it has been life changing. You will never ever ever regret it. My husband was a hard sell in trying it, now he won't poop anywhere but at home lol he feels disgusting without it. Took less than 10 minutes to install and only needed a Philips head screwdriver.

Basic $25 bidet

Slightly nicer one for $35

Get a bidet. They aren't expensive and they will save you so much time. Seriously, it's the best life choice you'll ever make.


https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_4?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1498093189&sr=1-4&keywords=bidet

I installed it in my master bedroom. I have this one Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_UhiLzbQHS5ZDG

I can't say enough positive things about it. I don't know how I lived without it so long. The kids might play with it but that seems easily correctable and worth the headache

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_QZMLDbZ8H5VD8

for realz.
https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_4?crid=1V0I2XNBQH5K4&keywords=lux+bidet+neo+120&qid=1571438229&sprefix=lux+b%2Caps%2C142&sr=8-4

that's what i have...life changing.

Yo I'm gonna be honest with you... I went to the local pub last night and ate a mountain of Nachos while watching the NCAA Finals. I'm mildly lactose intolerant. I've taken three painful dumps so far today and my butthole has taken quite the beating. Nonetheless, I still highly recommend everyone buy a bidet. The Europeans know what's up. Here's the one I bought off Amazon over 5 years ago. Still as good as new. Only $35 bucks with free Prime 1 day shipping. At those prices you can't afford NOT to buy one. If they had these installed at my work's bathroom, I wouldn't be in this mess. At the very least, they could install the three seashells. It's 2017. Stop wiping with paper, you savages.

Buy a Bidet off amazon and dont ever whipe more than twice again. I will link it below. Once you go Bidet you never go back.

​

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_4?keywords=bidet&qid=1568176780&s=gateway&sr=8-4

Or just buy a bidet. No more need to pollute the environment by cutting down trees to wipe your ass and it may be semi-expensive at first ($35 for one off Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_t4-vzbC9Z4V0Z ) but in the long run, you will save money.

You motherfuckers need a bidet.

Boi, they cost like $30 on Amazon. I have this one and fr, I'm never going back to just toilet paper ever again

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO

a bidet could change your life, friend.

Not quite 20, but have 2 of these. Work great, wife and I both love it, going into year 3.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00A0RHSJO/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1

You could always install a bidet onto your toilet.


They’re really easy to use and involve no waste.


You can check out one here

I got this one for christmas and it’s been great! That said I cannot comprehend how anyone can turn the dial past like 2, maybe 3, let alone all the way, without giving themselves an enema...

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO I got this one. It's got a pretty intense spray, so I had to also get a valve thingy to control it better so I didn't give myself an enema every poop, but I like it now lol.

Of course! There are a view inexpensive and promising ones. I chose this . Not exactly dirt cheap, but cheap compared to its similarly highly-rated competitors. There are cheaper ones out there.

We honestly talked about them and found the idea to be a good one, I just didn’t think he’d commit to the idea. Now he has to try it! I’ll keep the sub updated 😆

Happy early birthday wishes to your husband!!!

I personally use this one and it's great

I have one of those and one of these also.

I think these do a better job of shotgunning your chocolate starfish while the Luxe is better at 'DEEP' cleaning in there. I trade off which toilet I use in my house depending on how it's feeling before coming out.

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=pd_bxgy_201_img_3?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=B00A0RHSJO&pd_rd_r=7b9644a3-2f08-11e9-910d-c707fb6d7b72&pd_rd_w=A6cuN&pd_rd_wg=sDg4s&pf_rd_p=6725dbd6-9917-451d-beba-16af7874e407&pf_rd_r=PHKRPCWHY4DRZ0P4454D&psc=1&refRID=PHKRPCWHY4DRZ0P4454D&pldnSite=1

Honestly people still just don't know what a modern bidet is, they still think its a separate unit entirely like the little sink

I try to explain to people that its $40 on amazon, installs in minutes with no tools, and lives right under your toilet seat. It makes you shower fresh after every poop and you end up saving money over time with the reduced TP/Wet Wipe consumption. It's completely hands free.

I evangelize about bidets like a 1920s automobile owner talking to his horse & buggy neighbor. Ya'll in the past doing it wrong.

What other mess do you NOT bring water into play to clean up?? Especially shit? You can wipe for days but you're never as clean as a constant adjustable stream of water can get you.

Basic model

Hot Water model

Okay well have I got a surprise for you!

THIS IS THE ACTUAL THING YOU NEVER KNEW YOU NEEDED

Once you have it you will wonder why and how you lived so long without one.

For the longest time, I used wet wipes. They get expensive over time.

I bought one of these, spent 20 minutes installing it. Haven't looked back since.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00A0RHSJO/ref=oh_details_o09_s00_i00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

That's the one I have.

This is what they're talking about https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_k1p8AbPW6BASR

No need for power outlets or complicated setups. These bidet attachments fit on almost any toilet and simply tap into the fresh water that goes into the toilet bowl. You can add it in a rental apartment no problem. It's not warm water but that doesn't really matter. Almost all of my friends have these now and everyone swears by them.

i got a bidet attachment from amazon about a year ago, and it has been the best $30 i've spent. this one is super easy to install and very affordable:

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_3?keywords=bidet&qid=1556635315&s=gateway&sr=8-3

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?crid=3EQZQVHVDDBCI&keywords=bidet+for+toilet&qid=1554255741&s=gateway&sprefix=bide&sr=8-3

I mean....... I ain't rich but my butthole feels like a million dollars!

This is the one we got:

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO

You can install yourself - super quick and easy

You gotta buy one of these

$35 bidet and joy can be yours.

This is the one I have. You can buy one that has a hook up for hot water as well but my tap water isn't cold for whatever reason so it doesn't bother me to just have a cold water line. It uses the water that would eventually run to the tank. It's basically like using the water from your sink line--I know a lot of people think that its uses "toilet bowl" water but it doesn't. It's really easy to install. I actually have reinstalled it on a different toilet in my house and it worked on both. You do have to buy little spacers to attach to the bottom of your toilet seat since the bidet attachment makes the back of the seat sit a bit higher than the front. Again, they're really easy to install/uninstall. Definitely get the ones that screw on so they don't fall off one day into the toilet.

To use you just stay seated and SLOWLY turn on the knob. The one I have linked has SUPER HIGH water pressure but maybe there are models that aren't so strong. Do NOT turn it on while you're standing in front of it "just to make sure it works". I shot myself in the chest the first time I tested it hahahaha. Lots of guests also get curious and turn it on while standing in front of the toilet instead of sitting and end up getting shot in the chest or face. It's hilarious. My father in law for shot in the forehead with the water!

All in all its a 45$ investment if you use the same set up I did--definitely worth the money and if you can always upgrade to a different model if you end up liking it!

There are handheld type options that look like a shower head but they require maneuvering on the toilet and seem like more trouble than just staying seated.

I tried moist wipes for a while but a lot of them have alcohol in them and seemed to dry out more than they helped.

Sorry for the long winded response, hope it was helpful!

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00A0RHSJO/ref=yo_ii_img?ie=UTF8&psc=1

You've prompted me to check these out:

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00A0RHSJO/ref=s9_acsd_al_bw_c_x_2_w

I think I will get this. One review reported using 1/3 less t.p. and I know my septic system would appreciate this, plus the other obvious benefit.

You can get them to retro-fit on nearly any toilet. I got this one for about $45CDN just because of all the bidet talk here on reddit. I figured for the price it wasn't much of a gamble.

I can't express how much I love the thing. It is so far superior to toilet paper and you will have no idea until you try it.

I spent this weekend away from home and had to actually wipe my own ass for the first time in months. It was awful. Ate something that didn't agree with me so I was using the toilet more than usual too. Couldn't wait to get home.

Seriously, try it.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_N1SNAb2MGXDD8


Am I allowed to link directly to products? This is the one I bought. I was off by 15 bucks It looks like but w/e.

My mom went to Italy and loved the idea so much, she bought an installable one from Amazon. She's the only person I know who has one.

https://smile.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?keywords=bidet+sprayer+for+toilet&qid=1557426938&s=gateway&sprefix=bidet&sr=8-3

Skip the wet wipes, a bidet is cheaper AND more environmentally friendly

Bruh. Buy this guy and install it.
Best $35 you'll ever spend. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_vtA3Bb2H598MF

Just get one of these.

35 bucks and they work great.

On mobile and too lazy to format for a shorter link, but here you go!

Best $35 I’ve ever spent. This one comes with everything you need to install as well, so even if you don’t have any tools at all, you can still install it easily.


https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=asc_df_B00A0RHSJO/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=167148575413&hvpos=1o1&hvnetw=g&hvrand=10510592816483862097&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9006810&hvtargid=pla-274847307778&psc=1

As someone who takes narcotics for pain, may I recommend Miralax? It dissolves in coffee easily and helps keep the constipation to a minimum.

Softer poop will be much easier to pass, talk to the docs about how much Miralax you need.

(I'm not a medical professional, please talk to an expert before taking new drugs!)

You're also going to need a bidet attachment for your toilet. That will help clean your butt without lots of painful wiping. I recommend this one, it's easy to install and use: "Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white)" https://smile.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/

Good luck with your butthole, OP, I hope you heal quickly. Remember that the embarrassment will fade, accidents happen :)

First, congratulations!

My suggestion is to take good care of your fiancee... since that's what you want them to think you're doing, after all ;-)

Did your father-in-law already buy a bidet?? If not, Amazon US actually sells cheap basic bidets/spray toilet seats that you could install, if you really wanted to go above and beyond. Really, though, a bidet is the answer you seek... your in-laws will feel comfortable, and happy to know you cared enough to go out of your way since bidets aren't so common in the U.S.


Having slippers, chopsticks, and bottled beverages (non-sweetened) available for them would also be a nice gesture. Not everyone uses them, but for some it's a real comfort to have them around.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_pfr3AbKEA5BXC

Best $35 ive spent on Amazon. Pro tip, upgrade to the metal t valve.

I. Love. My. Bidet. This one is like a jet stream, so you can clean the surface or douche out your ass. Best thing ever.

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO

I recommend this one.
Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_VATWAb88AS8BD

I have this one and it is a game changer. Totally recommend it. Not only do you use little or no TP, but the feeling of being totally clean afterwards is awesome. I used to pride myself on being a company time pooper, now I wait til I get home (if I can help it) to use the bidet.

Bought on January 8, 2017. https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B00A0RHSJO/ref=oh_aui_search_detailpage?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Papa Bless

Buy a bidet attachment for your toilet. No wipes to buy or clog your pipes, and you stay nice and clean. Best $40 ever.

Edit: [This] (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00FPYIK6M/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_1TRHzb04T8P8Y) is worth getting too to replace the plastic tee that comes with the bidet and give you better flow control.

Something like this will do. https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1503720717&sr=8-1&keywords=luxe+bidet

I got you fam!

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_mi-ADbRDZNCG6

dirty ass? clean it up!

Pro Tip: Buy a Bidet add-on. They’re under $35 on Amazon

I had 3 fistulas: 1 low, 2 high. They did a fistulotomyb the low one and put draining setons in the 2 high ones. That was 5 months ago.

I bathe twice per day, each time for minimum 30 minutes but often for 90-120 minutes per bath. I read books, check reddit on my phone, watch videos, etc. I'm trying to jerry-rig some setup where I'd feel secure having my laptop in there so I could work during the day. It's hard to overstate how good a hot soak feels.

I also have a bidet on my toilet and a travel bidet which I take with me whenever I'm not home. I use panty liners to deal with drainage and change those 3-4 times per day.

I'm so grateful to have flexibility with my job where I can work from home on days I don't feel well. This experience would be much worse if I had limitations on my hygiene.

Other than the fistulas and 5-6 watery bowel movements per day I'm not overly symptomatic (subject to diet) so I'm grateful for that.

Started remicade and methotrexate a month ago. GI & colorectal surgeon want to give it 9-12 months and see if the fistulas are closing up.

Bidet links:

Base $35 model, cold water only https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO

Deluxe $60 model, hot and cold water https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RX2UI

Travel Bidet: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B008CSDKSQ

Switch to a Bidet and save on toilet paper and your bumm.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 least expensive but works well

Get a bidet! I highly recommend one, makes everything sparkly clean, and helps toilet paper purchases go further.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bide... https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_c_api_8ItEzb3V8KM6Y

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO

Not electric. I have this and it is nice. Cold water is ok and refreshing.

https://nutritionfacts.org/video/chicken-out-of-utis/ Click on the "View transcript" button below the video if you don't want to watch. It has the benefit of being evidence based.

**Edit to add: https://nutritionfacts.org/video/avoiding-chicken-to-avoid-bladder-infections/

I got my bidet off Woot, but Amazon has them for under $30. You'll want to get a better connector than the plastic one they come with, but it's been a godsend for me.


https://www.amazon.com/TP70-Handheld-Personal-Portable-Capacity/dp/B00O92IF6Q/ref=sr_1_7?crid=7YUMED4AGJKQ is a cheap and easy tester for the portable ones.

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_4 is what Woot.com had for about the same price, and I love it.

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_4?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1524602455&sr=1-4&keywords=bidet

yo i highly recommend a bidet attachment for your toilet if you're a little skidmarksy in y'undapants!

BOOM!

For anyone curious this is the one we got. https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO?ie=UTF8&ref_=cm_cr_arp_d_product_top
Not the cheapest and not the most expensive, but it works like a charm

Get one. It will absolutely change your life. Best $40 I've ever spent.
Luxe Bidet Neo 120 (Elite Series) - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment w/ Strong Faucet Valves and Metal Hoses https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_awd_FiWbub1FQP5FM

The Luxe bidet is easy to install and comes with everything you need inside the box at $36 via amazon:

Luxe Bidet Neo 120

I like the knob rather than the more common "dials" which seem harder to twist. Good luck!

get a bidet. will change your life. Used to take me maybe 25 wipes (and I would always put water on my toilet paper to clean better). Now it takes me about 6-7. Imagine getting shit on your arm, would you simply wipe it with tp 25 times and call it good? No, you would rinse that shit off first with water, wipe some more. So why is your ass any different? It isn't. Get a bidet. You will use less TP and thus have a less chafed asshole, no more itchy asshole if you ever had that issue.

What's the difference?

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1491855606&sr=8-2&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=bidet+for+toilet

A bidet will change your life.

I have this one...
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00A0RHSJO?psc=1
It's only $40. There really is no excuse for smearing feces all over your anus.

Since colorectal cancer is on the rise, and earlier in today's sub someone mentioned bidet attachments for their toilet -- I think we should take a moment to appreciate this review of the top selling bidet attachment on Amazon:

>Speaking as a hirsute gentleman, the Luxe Bidet Neo 120 has soured me on pooping in bidet-less toilets forever. It's shown me the difference between rubbing peanut butter out of shag carpeting with a paper towel, and that sparkling clean feeling you get right when you step out of the shower.

>The unit took me all of about 10 minutes to install on my existing toilet with only a wrench. The easy-to-control flow valve allows you to provide just the right amount of water pressure for a full range of cleaning, from "gentle trickling stream" to "full-on 'Silkwood' decontamination", ensuring the end of your bowel movement leaves you feeling cleaner and more refreshed than using just toilet paper alone. Even flush-able wet wipes pale in comparison.

I hope to report back on the state of my rectal health shortly after a few weeks of use. Hemorrhoids be damned!

Yep! https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO

But when we replace this toilet were getting a true bidet toilet.

Yeah, Toto Washlets are the shit. But if you don't want to spend that much money, for like $40 you can get a very effective alternative.

It'll change your life. Highly recommended for anyone with an asshole.

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_4?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1506473914&sr=1-4&keywords=bidet

Not only will your ass be squeeky clean, but your tp bill will pay for the bidet in a month or two.

Plus it feels kinda good.

I wish I had the hot water/ seat heater/ air dryer one but I only have the basic one

I swear every person in the US needs to get one. Totally changed the way I poop. I go through like one roll of toilet paper every month or two, I always feel refreshed, and I never get swamp ass. Buy this thing RIGHT NOW. It installs in less than 5 minutes.

http://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/

They're pretty sweet especially if you have a hairy ass.

I've had no problems with this one:

Amazon Canada

Amazon USA

It seems that your comment contains 1 or more links that are hard to tap for mobile users.
I will extend those so they're easier for our sausage fingers to click!


Here is link number 1 - Previous text "$35"

Here is link number 2 - Previous text "$48"



----
^Please ^PM ^/u/eganwall ^with ^issues ^or ^feedback! ^| ^Delete

My Shiny Hiney commercial... It saddens me that Bidets still aren't a thing in the U.S.

Seriously - go buy and install one. It will cost you $35 on Amazon. Your butt will thank you. You also will not use nearly as much toilet paper. The one I linked is the one I have in my apartment. It took 10 minutes to install. You'll recoup that $35 in savings on toilet paper.

Lux Bidet. $38 at Amazon
Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_vVsNDb0WQ25F8

Go buy a bidet. Seriously one of the best $35-$50 you can spend. After a month, I ended up buying one for each bathroom, my parent's house, and even a couple of friends.

Buy this valve too, it helps with the install.

Rather than baby wipes, invest in a simple mechanical bidet. We've got this model and love it so much that we've given them as housewarming gifts and I've even installed them at my office so I don't have to poop like a savage during the workday...! Trust me - with the bidet, you're shower-fresh every single time, and you'll never want to go back to just toilet paper.

And you can help your husband get over the embarrassment with a little help from Parks & Rec...

We recently got this one and installation was simple. https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?keywords=luxe+bidet&qid=1550727061&s=gateway&sr=8-3 Since we've had it, I have thought "more women need these, especially postpartum and when menstruating." Useful for sure. And I say this as someone who was totally resistant to the idea.

A bidet. I bought one after someone in a thread exactly like this suggested it, and it's as life-changing as they said it would be. https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO (Don't forget to use Amazon smile if you buy it.....doctors without borders could use the help)

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://smile.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_5gyyCbHB0HQGD

This is the one I have, can't go back.

$35 solution.

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO

This is the one I got.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apip_HbAtBcYKEFmk4

It works, but it hits my asshole at such force that the spray shoots out from my ass, under the seat, and down my legs. This is on the lowest pressure setting too.

My buddy has this one and swears by it. He lives in the south, so the cold water isn't as big of a deal. I live in MN so the heated one is necessary.

Just a heads up, but you can get a $25-35 bidet attachment for any regular toilet. They work pretty well.

Amazon Luxe 120

We've only been able to convert one person in our immediate circle of friends. And the guy's wife won't even use it. My mother screamed when she tried it at my house, which was at least entertaining... ;)

This is the one we have. Luxe Bidet Attachment on Amazon

Hello, sorry to hijack your comment but I have a question for you as someone who works in a hotel if you don't mind. I will be staying in a hotel for 4 months (paid by my employer) while I finish the job training. I use a toilet bidet like This one in my house, and I honestly feel like I can't live without it. Would something like this be allowed in my hotel room? There is no plumbing that needs to be done, the bidet connects directly to the toilet pipe and it's very easy to install. Again sorry for the off topic question but I really don't know where to ask this.

Why not just get one now? Just attach this one to your toilet.

There are 2 types of bidets. There’s what you described but there are also super cheap add ons you can get to an existing toilet. I spend around $30 on mine and it only took probably 20 minutes to install, with zero damage to the toilet, floor, wall anything. No additional plumbing needed either.

I think it was this one: https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1550391056&sr=8-3&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=bidet&dpPl=1&dpID=419LXSZM6YL&ref=plSrch

Yes! https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-185-Elite/dp/B00P2XZIP2/ref=sr_1_3 This is the dual nozzle for feminine cleaning and rear. If you only need rear, get the single nozzle model https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_4

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO?ref=yo_pop_ma_swf

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_4?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1525063099&sr=1-4&keywords=bidet

Less than $40 right now. Get it, you’ll love it! But, go very light on the pressure...i can’t imagine why anyone or how anyone would use the #10 setting, lol.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_RxZnDbNVJXDDB

I have this one and don't know how I lived without it.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_y7ZCxbZ57VF12

Lol I felt the exact same way! My hubby really wanted to try one and I was iffy about it. Then I read some reviews:

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO


We aren't the only ones who were unsure. I will tell you this- it took a few tries to get used to it, but now, I really don't like going anywhere other than the bathroom with the bidet. If you try it I think you might be pleasantly surprised! (and no- I'm not a Big Bidet Shill, just a happy bidet owner. America is way behind the times on this. The rest of the world things it's crazy to NOT use one.)

Haven't bought yet but that seems to be the best rated and most popular on Amazon. In the end they're all designed to shoot water at your ass so the only really difference in most is the dial lol.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_u6HoDbSTZHPMV

You can buy one from Amazon for $40. It takes 15 minutes to install. I doubt you're not going to like it, but even if you do it's not a huge waste of time and money.

http://amzn.com/B00A0RHSJO

This is the best $40 you will ever spend.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00A0RHSJO/

Game changer. I've got some digestive issues, not dissimilar to UC, and I cannot advocate for this thing enough.

$60, This is my go-to funny yet functional birthday gift I've given a few friends. It does both hot/cold.

$36 cold water only version

Edit: My buddy sent me this SFW 13 second video of the $60 unit in action.

This is an actual bidet and there are others that look more sleek. I picked this one because the gift card I had was $25. You can shop around for it.

That or use a shit ton of toilet paper or clog your toilet with wet wipes. Hope you do know most bidets are ones that are attached to the toilet. Very rare for a separate one, only seen those in Paris in my hotel. Everywhere else it was attached like this to the toilet.

There is also this one. Just need to keep looking into you find one you like.

>Does it use cold water?

This one does. This other one uses both hot and cold.

>If so, is that unpleasant when it's cold out?

Not if your bathroom is warm.

>How do you dry your butt afterwards?

TP, I guess. I don't know for sure.

>Is it sufficient pressure for really nasty poops?

Probably, but I don't know for sure.

Pretty simple I believe. Something like this..

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1499373840&sr=8-4&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=Bidet+seat&dpPl=1&dpID=419LXSZM6YL&ref=plSrch

Get one of these. Dabbing tissue paper in toilet water sounds horrific.

I’d be happy to offer you guidance on your journey into the amazing world of bidets.

I started out with this one:

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1523776662&sr=8-3&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=bidet&dpPl=1&dpID=419LXSZM6YL&ref=plSrch

It’s an awesome bidet and does the job perfectly, is super easy to install and for $35 you can’t go wrong.

However about six months ago I decided to splurge and get the king of all bidets, the Toto Washlet:

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00UCIOWRM/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1523776789&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=toto+washlet&dpPl=1&dpID=31uvbuDPUAL&ref=plSrch

It’s expensive but worth it; the water is heated, it has different speeds and the nozzle can move back and forth, and the best part is that it dries your butt afterwards, which is amazing.

One thing about bidets though—for us guys, unless you don’t mind your balls being sprayed with water, it is kind of necessary to make sure they’re out of the way, or figure out a position where the water doesn’t hit them.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1519144406&sr=8-3&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=bidet

:) saves you on TP too. Also super hygienic, better for your septic tank/sewer system. Easy install.

Fyi, you can get a bidet cover for a toilet for less than $100, and they have pretty good reviews
$330 TOTO SW2024#01 A200 WASHLET Electronic Bidet Tolet Seat with SoftClose Lid. Elongated, Cotton White https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0165UFOOA/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_mJn6AbP3940TV

$35 Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_CJn6AbAR9M0K6

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_1?s=hi&ie=UTF8&qid=1525740136&sr=1-1&keywords=Luxe+Bidet+Neo+120+-+Self+Cleaning+Nozzle+-+Fresh+Water+Non-Electric+Mechanical+Bidet+Toilet+Attachment+%28blue+and+white%29

1. Talk to a therapist about this. This is some thing that could be helped with the right person to talk to.
   
   
2. You need to eat. You're hurting yourself to avoid your period. This isnt okay.
   
   
3. Look into birth control to eliminate your period. I can personally attest that the Mirena IUD stopped my period (2 years strong, only light spotting at the first 2 months). I've also read about BC pills that can reduce/eliminate your period. A doctor is a good place to start for help with all of this. Note: IDK how old you are or what country you're from, but in my opinion if you're old enough to have a period you're old enough to use birth control. I hope this is accessible to you.
   
   
4. If its touching the blood, look into using tampons and getting a bidet ( https://smile.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_MrGRCb6X5PXPM ). This washes off your private-bits after you go or have your period and you just pat dry when done. No need to touch a lot of blood. Talk to a doctor or gyno on how to use tampons. Here is also a pretty good guide https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/health-and-wellness/menstruation/how-do-i-use-tampons-pads-and-menstrual-cups .
   
   Bottom line is you need to eat. Talk to someone about how you're feeling and about accessing these supports until you've dealt with the psychological root of your menophobia.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_ep_dp_8ogezbMWQPKFX

Thats the one I got. Its pretty good and worth spendin 35 bucks on just to see if you like it or not. If not it was just 35 bucks but if you do it is gonna be a game changer. No more mud butt, endless wiping on messy days, etc.

It was pretty easy to install with basic tools. They have a higher end one that's got hot water hookups that would be cool during winter. Summer around here the cold water is warm anyway in my neck of the woods.

First time was a little weird but after that it was awesome.

Here's a decent one, but you can shell out more for heat control and other stuff. My morning ritual involves immediately defecating while deleting cringey facebook memories. Treat yourself!

Also, females have disgusting bathroom habits. Growing up, I always thought they were the cleaner sex...you should start leaving unflushed, steaming Chipotle piles in their bathroom

best $40 you're ever going to spend, life-changer! https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_MyhSAb8MW8QW3)

The only way to come clean about that

If I'm being honest, the bidet is made of super cheap plastic and it cracked where the bolt from the seat goes through it. Replacing it for $40 every few years is worth it to me. YMMV

Just buy one of the bidets that attaches to your toilet like: https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1502899352&sr=8-2&keywords=astor+bidet

I've had this one for about two years and I like it.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_fBfQzbE8VGRM3

> unless bidets began to be a thing in the US

I've had this bidet on my wishlist forever but haven't pulled the trigger yet. Just walked into a friend's place the other day and saw they had gotten the same model; they were raving about it.

Have you considered a bidet? They expedite the wiping process and make it all much more sanitary! They're available for $36 on Amazon and can be installed quite easily on any toilet using basic tools. https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_4?keywords=bidet&qid=1571242073&sr=8-4

Get a bidet attachment, just air dry after. You will save so much on using little to no TP.

One way to do it:

• spray,
  
• go,
  
• spray,
  
• wipe,
  
• flush
  .. the first spray help ease in cleaning up after you go. Most bidet types will not agitate the bowl while spraying.
  
  I have this type:
  http://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1420674033&sr=8-5&keywords=bidet
  
  

Problem Solved

It was about two years ago I read about bidets (I think in frugal) and my God, what a difference in money saved, cleanliness, comfort.

bidet seat

adapter that comes with seat sux, so buy this one

Bidet add ons go for $35 on Amazon . Save the planet while feeling like you just took a shower!

Also if you got poo on your face, you would definitely wash it off and not just use a paper towel to smear it, right???

My situation is similar to yours, OP.

This Parks and Rec. clip speaks to me.

Recently I bought this cheap "entry level" bidet on Amazon, and honestly... I sort of look forward to pooping because it's so much easier now. It's a maximum 10 minute install process that anyone can do, and then you're set.

You sit down and take your poop, then turn on the bidet, slowly increasing the pressure until it feels right, then wiggle your ass around a little bit. Turn off the bidet, wipe a couple times to clear the water off, and then move on with your day.

I'd advise against using wet wipes if you plan on flushing them. Even though the boxes say they're flushable, they really aren't. "Flushable" wet wipes cause so many clogged septic systems every year. Here's a quick 2 minute video from the BBC talking about what wet wipes do to the London sewer systems. It's much worse if you have a septic tank buried in your yard. Wet wipes can easily clog the hell out of your tank and then you need to get it pumped. Imagine coming home from work one hot summer day and your front lawn has become a literal puddle of shit and piss because your tank clogged and overflowed.

missing: bidet

Buy one of these, and stop wiping your butt with your hand like some primitive cave person.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_UuV6CbDVDBX94

This is the answer right here. You can get one off Amazon for $35.

This is the exact one I bought:

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_37H4BbXGF7JG4

American link. This is a great addition, I have one and use it daily. Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO

Oh, no, dude. You don’t have to be rich for a bidet. We have one.

Here, look:

https://smile.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1542242787&sr=8-3&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=bidet&dpPl=1&dpID=419LXSZM6YL&ref=plSrch

Exactly what they other poster said. They are both excellent bidets and widely available. I just happened to grab one at random from Amazon for the link, which unfortunately seems to be a lousy example. This is the one I own and very much approve of.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_2HDYBbZN954AH
I just got “Amazon’s choice” but there’s a bunch out there including ones that heat the water if you’re into that

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_m83VBb1G8TRZN

I got this specific one. It comes with a waterline spitter and 1 supply line. I think at the time mine was cheaper. I’m sure you can find another one that does the trick too if this is too much money. They are for sure worth the investment.

Bidets are game-changers. The Luxe ones are east to install and cheap, too.

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO

Look no further.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_C9MQybPPGYTH7

Bonus quote from reviews:

"Speaking as a hirsute gentleman, the Luxe Bidet Neo 120 has soured me on pooping in bidet-less toilets forever. It's shown me the difference between rubbing peanut butter out of shag carpeting with a paper towel, and that sparkling clean feeling you get right when you step out of the shower."

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO works great with any toilet

This is the one we have (in US), not sure how plumbing differs where you're at but it attaches externally to the water line on the toliet. Bidet

They don’t sell mine anymore, but this is the updated version

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white)

There are fancier models that do more, all the way up to $300. Mine was about $30. Very easy to set up. No permanent changes to toilet. Mine is now on its second commode.

My FH and I are both on the Charmin bandwagon but we differ on whether we get Ultra Soft or Ultra Strong. But I'm usually shopping so we get Ultra Soft.

BUT I think everyone here is missing something that my FH introduced me to. A bidet!

It's seriously the best thing ever. Your toosh will thank you. And you'll use less of whichever TP you are buying.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self... https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share

It's this one here. I live in New Zealand so I had to replace the T with a 1/2 inch one because most toilet plumbing in NZ is 1/2 inch. Also had to get a 600mm extension for the tube because the connection was too far away.

The bowl on my toilet has the mounting holes quite far back behind the bowl and the seats available were hitting the bidet at the back and it would flex even with spacers. So I fitted the seat and drew out where I would need to cut and just snapped the piece off with some pliers.

Fits great now and doesn't even need spacers. Just had to ruin a cheap toilet seat haha

35 bucks on amazon! Installed on all the toilets. First thing I had ordered even we moved in to the new house. amazon bidet for 35

it will change your life

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_HfG-zbRTBYH4J

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_4?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1511125250&sr=1-4&keywords=bidet&dpID=419LXSZM6YL&preST=_SX300_QL70_&dpSrc=srch

theres a video there for the install. its easy and not permanent. you'll need some channel locks and a small adjustable wrench.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_010eAbEZM388J

Bidet attachment. Life changer.

This is the one I got two years ago, changed my life for the better. Would you clean poo of your arm with a piece of dry paper, or would you use water?

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_NTItDb8978CQ6

I'm two weeks post-op.

People here all have fantastic suggestions so far!
I used:

1. Fruit of the Loom bras from Wal-Mart, look like this. They were cheaper at the store vs. Amazon. I specifically like this bra because it's shaped like a tank top -- not a racerback, which means I can wear more clothes with it without straps showing.
   
2. Curad Non-Stick pads that look like this. That's what my doctor shoved in my post-op bra, so I just got more of them. Now I don't need them anymore. I didn't even finish the one box of 12.
   
3. Husband installed this bidet for me. The dignity of cleaning my own butt after such a challenging surgery was nice.
   
4. Someone else said heating pad -- yep.
   
5. Consider pre-making some food -- something really healthy and easy to eat. I made a diet soup that is meant for a cleanse because it had a ton of fiber (cabbage, lots of other veg) and was easy to heat a little at a time. I can provide the recipe link if you want it. I also took psyllium fiber tablets every day and drank dark coffee each morning, while drinking as much water as I could. And I lost some extra weight with the soup, too. For breakfast, I only ate oatmeal with cinnamon and bananas since that's so easy to digest. I had no problems, uh, getting the job done with all that fiber.
   
6. We installed a handheld shower head. I had my husband around to help me bathe, and it made things easier for both of us. I sat in a shallow bath and he helped me clean with the shower head. In the shallow bath, I used some scented epsom salts to help me relax. The first couple of baths were uncomfortable and awkward and it helped.
   
7. Tylenol. I weaned myself off the drugs after 3-4 days. In the morning, I took half the dose of Tylenol (which is every 3 hours vs. 6) to see how my pain was, then I'd either take another one on time, wait a while, or take half a pain pill. I did this until I was using only Tylenol and eventually nothing or only one dose a day of it.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO

Most don't require electricity. This one, for example. This one is slightly nicer and also requires no electricity. There are also hand sprayer models: I opened the wall and plumbed mine to both the hot and cold so I can wash my ass with warm water. This one just tees off the toilet supply line.

Easily one of the [best purchases](http://amzn.com/B00A0RHSJO) I've ever made.

Bidet. Buy a bidet. It takes ~15 mins to hook it up. You can also try a squatting stool.

This is the one I have. It's $40 extremely well spent. Spray-clean your bung and wipe once to dry off.

Easy to add one. This one works great.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?qid=1426440167&sr=8-3&pi=AC_SY200_QL40&keywords=Bidet

I had the WORST heartburn, gas, bowels for about 2 weeks. Adding fiber and taking an extra probiotic worked wonders for me.

As a side note: For under $50 you can buy a bidet toilet seat attachment on Amazon. That's what we have, but there are a bunch of choices. It took us 20 minutes to install ourselves. It is life changing. I have no clue why every house doesn't come with one.

I just (disgusting, I know) had a colonoscopy. No bleeding, no chapped backside, no enraged hemorrhoids.

Well I only have the one and it was like $40, not sure what your budget is exactly. But here's a link!

The one I have is from LUXE Bidet, looks to be $34 usd now.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00A0RHSJO?psc=1&ref=ppx_pop_mob_b_pd_title

Lol "set it to jet" haha ! I like that. No, but seriously check this out, it's the one I have

I own this one from Amazon. Takes about 5 minutes to install and costs about $50.00 Definitely worth it!
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00A0RHSJO/ref=ox_sc_act_title_1?ie=UTF8&psc=1&smid=ATVPDKIKX0DER

this is the one I have love it. Only $40

Yeah it was totally worth it, although my water pressure is awesome at my house and I made a few mistakes being over zealous with it at first leaving me a little sore for a while... Also I probably would've sprung the extra few bucks for the heated one as my water gets awfully cold too but overall it's a great unit that my wife still refuses to use.

this is the unit I bought

This one is cheap and parts look suspect, but this thing just works. Great reviews on amazon too

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00A0RHSJO/ref=wms_ohs_product

I was thinking of something like this that you add to an existing toilet: https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/

I’ll tell you what, if you stop ruining your plumbing you can have it for free.

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1526916104&sr=8-3&keywords=bidet+toilet+seats

It’s so cheap you’ll make your money back from those nasty things inside of a week.

Best $40.00 you'll ever spend.

You can order one that connects to your toilet on Amazon.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_gUn-AbXK9FPHH

Hi.

One recommendation for your DH and FSIL: a bidet.

Don't trip out, they are cheap, sturdy, and easy to install. You know that nozzle on the wall behind the toilet? That's where the water for the toilet comes from. You basically stick the bidet right on that line.

Trust me, if I can do it, anyone can do it, you just need an adjustable wrench and a couple of different-sized screwdrivers.

Forget discussing toilet paper, seriously.

And non-digestive issues people need to learn about these things as well, because honestly? This washes your butt, okay. It does not give you an enema!

Non-mobile: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?qid=1426440167&sr=8-3&pi=AC_SY200_QL40&keywords=Bidet

^That's ^why ^I'm ^here, ^I ^don't ^judge ^you. ^PM ^/u/xl0 ^if ^I'm ^causing ^any ^trouble. ^WUT?

Install one of these, on every toilet you have.

Luxe Bidet Neo120

is your sink on the other side of the toilet?

you can just tap off that supply. bonus with this option is to use a mixer and get luke-warm water instead of freezing cold-water only for the bidet.

you'll have to learn to wash your butt with your left hand.

or step into the FUTURE

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/

You should show him reviews from all the bidet converts here: Luxe Bidet
I know, I know. One more thing to buy on Amazon. But this thing is so easy to install and it will change your life!

Came here to say this. Read a comment saying the same thing a few days ago. Bought this, installed it and it's actually been kinda fun shitting. Yeah you wipe to dry. But it's a nice clean butthole after that.

Yes just do the Amazon search and you'll see a few models that are all highly rated. I got this one for $35 because it was the highest rated and had the most reviews (and has the cleaning function). I honestly can't tell what the difference is between the other models besides a few basic functionalities. The one i got works perfectly and is a great price.

If you don't already have something like it, I have one of these and it's great. Pretty cold, but easy to install if you have basic plumbing knowledge, and they make cheaper and more expensive versions.

Bidets just need to be standard. I have this one and it is amazing. Now it just sucks when I'm away from home - so in a public restroom I grab a wet paper towel to do a final pass after toilet paper and then toss it in the trash.

Pretty sure it's this model, and there is a video on that page.

Probably a late reply but I would recommend to get one that at least has a self-cleaning function. It only costs a few dollars more but it is much more sanitary. The [Luxe Neo 120] (https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1480841750&sr=8-1&keywords=luxe+bidet+neo+120) is the version that has it and has a good review.

I just had a new toilet installed last week and didn't think that this wouldn't fit https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_5?s=kitchen-bath&ie=UTF8&qid=1481689073&sr=1-5&keywords=bidet

Yours only missing one thing bro


Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_NhGPAbKCWHXD0

This will change your life

http://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO

You don't need to go that far though, forty bucks gets you a very capable add on: http://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO

These are the two I have.

Plain cold water one. Great first bidet, doesn't need power or to be near sink for hot water. Cheap.

Hot and cold water. Toilet needs to be near sink, I had to drill a small hole in cabinet to put hot water line from bidet to sink.


My dream bidet. Dries your ass, night light, user profile settings and more lol

Invest in the things you do daily! Love my bidets and good mattresses. Big quality of life improvements .

Get a bidet :) toilet paper lasts for months. Best investment of my life.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_XswNDbD7MH89B

Use this. I love mine https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?adgrpid=56091315836&gclid=Cj0KCQjwrfvsBRD7ARIsAKuDvMNyosM9z10OtzWQsZDpntLb3o9ISRo3EiWTZ9B-AMVbj4DepBdcRs8aAm9TEALw_wcB&hvadid=274676084112&hvdev=m&hvlocphy=1026579&hvnetw=g&hvpos=1t1&hvqmt=e&hvrand=15125099866675556155&hvtargid=aud-649564993678%3Akwd-299238691198&hydadcr=6443_9587363&keywords=bidets&qid=1570754520&sr=8-3

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_4?crid=C46P04BW0U5E&keywords=bedat+toilet&qid=1570805527&sprefix=bedat%2Caps%2C566&sr=8-4

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_tai_u0CODbW5719D8

You’ll thank me later.

Yes absolutely! This is the one I have:

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_8P1NDbV5YWW78

It’s great, a little intense at first but you get used to it! I miss mine when I’m not home lol

this is the one i’ve been looking at

pretty highly rated, good reviews. gonna be purchasing this one. hope this helps :)

I have this one and it is fantastic. So good, that I installed it on both our toilets.

Was just about to post something like this. If you can convince them to let you chuck one of these in there you won't give a damn about the TP quality.

IT's 2017, WHY DON'T YOU OWN ME?

I bought this and it's amazing. It just connects between the water line and the toilet https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO

I got this bidet a few months ago and it has changed my life. Honestly. It's amazing we use toilet paper at all with these things available. It takes 5-10 minutes to set up.

get a neo 120

You got $35?

This will solve all your problems. Seriously. It's a game-changer.

Neo lux on Amazon. Pretty easy install. No warm water option, but I'm it's not necessary. Extra spacers are needed for the toilet seat, it they didn't work too well with the slow closing like, but otherwise it's nice.

It gets a little finicky to clean, but I'm a bit of a neat freak.

https://smile.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?keywords=neo+luxe+bidet&qid=1558519510&s=gateway&sprefix=neo+lu&sr=8-3

They make bidet attachments that fit between your existing toilet seat and the toilet now. Just take the seat off, put it in place, put the seat back on and attach the water connection to the one that's serving your toilet now. Takes about 10 minutes and costs between $30 and $80, depending on which unit you get. No renovation required.

EDIT: This is the one I have

This takes < 10 min to install and takes up no extra room. Best damn purchase I've made in a long time.

why not one of these? there are many options available, but this is a nicely priced quality product. I recommend it.

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/

Get a bidet. I feel so much cleaner since I got one.

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1543440742&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=bidit&dpPl=1&dpID=419LXSZM6YL&ref=plSrch

A bidet might help. You can get a good one that's easy to install for less than $35. Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment

I would like to highly recommend anyone reading this to get a bidet. It severely cuts toilet paper use and genuinely improves your quality of life.
I use one similar to this.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_awd_rbQ8wbVMM3EPB

They sell them on amazon. It’s called a personal bidet. They have ones that attach to your toilet, or portable handheld ones in the form of spray bottles. Some examples:

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=gwm_tlc_pi?pf_rd_s=grid-11&pf_rd_t=Gateway&pf_rd_i=mobile&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=EFXTCPJAYK1XYTG3PYA2&pf_rd_p=04affaba-c566-4cec-9a48-677cfbfdb6f8&pd_rd_i=B00A0RHSJO

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B01DB8DRNO/ref=sspa_mw_detail_1?ie=UTF8&psc=1

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B07K21X113/ref=sspa_mw_detail_1?ie=UTF8&psc=1

You can buy bidet attachments on Amazon for US toilets - fairly affordable. Congrats on grad school. (https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_4?s=hi&ie=UTF8&qid=1500912639&sr=1-4&keywords=bidet+attachment+for+toilet)

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1536620447&sr=8-3&keywords=bidet

This is why:

1. Always use the right paper for the right job. If you're wiping your bathroom sink with toilet paper, you're gonna be sorry later.
   
   
2. Own a bidet attachment or a toilet with one built in. Your toilet paper will last way, way longer, and your butt/vag will be way, way cleaner.

I'm gonna hijack this thread really quick and say that I have installed those bidets that can fit onto your current toilet seat. I have them in both of my places, and as a dude, have been using them for years. I can say the best advantages are:

• Easy to install
  
• Use only a couple squares, just to dry
  
• Got that fresh clean feeling all day
  
  They're really not that expensive: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_3aVizbRPGPPA7

IMO in your case this is the solution Bidet

Here's the one I bought about about a year ago Amazon link

It's easy to install and does it's job.

I got this one:

Amazon link

Bidet
lLuxe Bidet Neo 120

Get a bidet, it'll help - your butt hole will thank you:

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO

This is the one

Have you thought about installing a bidet. I know there's ones on Amazon that is just an extension that anyone can add to their existing toilet. Costs like 30 USD iirc.

http://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO?ie=UTF8&keywords=bidet&qid=1464571117&ref_=sr_1_1&s=kitchen-bath&sr=1-1

Yep, one of these: Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_other_apa_bG-pxbS22AFDZ

Works great!

I have a $30 one and I love it. Something like this. All it uses is the clean cold water incoming to the toilet and use it to spray you clean. It doesn't have any electronics like these fancy ones.

What do you mean real?

This is the one I have and it's amazing.

Does $35 work?

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_PQTgAbTMVP3MR

A cool $35. You're welcome.

Luxe Bidet Neo 120 - Self Cleaning Nozzle - Fresh Water Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet Toilet Attachment (blue and white) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_Zq.JxbFA00H3R

Here you go buddy

I've bought and used multiple ones over the years. There are many different kinds, different categories, each with their own advantages and disadvantages.

I've used this and this before. And my brother had something like this which was very luxurious. :-)

I got a bidet before Xmas and I can't recommend it enough. It was simple to install, it's only cold water but that was surprisingly not a problem.

I'm at the point now where I'm telling everyone they should get a bidet.

The one I bought was $40

Do yourself a favor and install a $30 bidet.

Never squat or cheek-lift again. Life changing.

https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/

35 dollars and easy hook up.

It will stay on your toilet for many years. Why would you be throwing it away? Do you not buy anything because you might throw it away later?

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A0RHSJO?psc=1&smid=A2E4TKQ2QE4KJS